Yesterday I had one of those awful Diabetes days where my blood sugar ranged from 35 to 331. (Woke up high, overtreated and went low, 2 bad infusion sets). At 11:30 at night I was in the 300s and knew it wasn’t safe to go to sleep so I made a cappuchino so I could stay up all night and work on blood sugars. Somewhere around 3AM I got the “I’m so sick of this crap feeling”. Truth be told I rarely have that feeling (I consider diabetes somewhere between just a fact and a challenge), and I rarely have days like that. The last time I did it struck me how lucky I was to be diagnosed right before retirement, and to have the time to deal with this stuff. (When you have to work the next day you don’t have the luxury of deciding to stay up all night). At that time I posted a discussion on here about how much I admired all of you who deal with the D while working, going to school, raising families, etc.
Yesterday I had a different thought. My “I’m sick of this crap!” came from hating when my world feels like it’s narrowed down to numbers, and math, and carbs and testing and pump button-pushing, and ordering meds, and more testing. Then I realized that in a way, because I’m retired it’s all too easy to let my world get that narrow. I thought about a friend from high school, Tami, who died last year of a 20-year chronic illness. She, unlike me, was sick or in pain nearly all the time, and had severe mobility problems. But she worked really hard to keep her world from narrowing to her apartment. She went to theater and dance performances and social occasions, though she had to reschedule a lot. She told her doctor she couldn’t accept not being able to travel anymore and he had to help her be able to do that. A year before her death I met Tami and her husband in Costa Rica to celebrate her 60th birthday. I really respect how she fought to keep her world wider than her illness.
I think that whatever our daily lives are about, we all struggle to keep our lives wider. Some days we do better than others. So I would like to hear what you all do to keep your world wider than Diabetes.