Another Friday night and I ain't got nobody...I got some money cause I just got paid. . .[Paraphrased]Cat Stevens(Yusuf Islam)

Its 10:40pm here, and just took my oral meds, and am going to devour some strawberries with low fat whip cream which will smooth over two different cravings: 1) Going out and having some cocktails. Man I really miss going out without worry. 2) Munching on candies, cake or rocky road ice-cream.

I started smoking again about a year and a half ago to help curb over eating—for what its worth it worked I went from 252ish to 239lbs, and A1C dropped from 8.75 to 7.3. My M.D. sent me a letter stating my blood work is stable, and good. I noticed the free radicals were a little high but, they have always been high. So, I’m hoping to see 202lbs by this time next year—maybe longer.

Tom a mortician with diabetes about 5 years older than me came into the bar today without his cain. I was surprised because he lost half his foot a couple of years ago, and since then he has been a source of hard-core reality, and information in regards to my diabetes. He is thin so I just assume he is Type 1 but, that doesn’t change some of the similarities we share psychologically. Through him I see my own non-sensible glibness that boarders on insanity, and when conversation turns to what we fear and hate most which is our disease, anxiety builds quickly for both of us, and our talk ends abruptly. I don’t see Tom that often maybe two times a year, and this visit he informed me he was buying a funereal home, and asked if I would let him make my final arrangements. We both laughed a little, you know that laugh that’s a little uneasy. I told him my plot is in Oklahoma with my grand parents; the only people I thought ever gave a damn about me. Tom said he would fly me there himself. I had to go to the bathroom but, when I got back Tom had lift leaving a buck fifty on the bar for me.

Just took 31 units of lantus BG is 168 on the breeze II meter and 152 on the True meter. The difference between the reading on the meters ranges between 9 and 19 points. That’s so messed up!