Being hard on myself

Im at a point where now I have seen the effects of poor control and frankly, I dont wnat to see them again. I try to hold myself to a high goal because I feel like if I dont, then Ill slide down the slippery slope of “its ok just this once” which can occur all too often. For me that leads to BGs in the 200-300 range. I say this a lot, but its been 25 years that Ive been trying to achieve tight control. I just dont think I was mentally capable nor understood how I needed to do it. Now, I know, am ready, and can achieve the control.

Ive come up with this theory that Dr. B wants those insane 4.x A1Cs and 80mg/dl constant in order to offset any damage that we might have done earlier with high BGs and trends. Almost like a reversal of BG effect. I dont know that there is any validity to this, but it makes me strive for numbers like BSC posted up there. Sometimes, I can pull them off too. =^)