I have this great quote:
“I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.” - Marilyn Monroe
Yup. My fiance’s mother told him to stop checking up on me. He had called her to make sure I was awake when I stayed home from work one day. (I have been through about 10 insulin shock comas) She said she wasn’t going to check on me. She said that it wasn’t his “job” to worry about me. He told her that I’m a part of the family and to please do it (I was sleeping and didnt hear my phone) because he’s marrying me and going to give her grandchildren.
I know that his family kind of hates me for bringing this into their bloodlines, and I understand their frustration. Who wants to see their son worry all the time? But it’s not my fault either. I’m just trying to get through the day too.
My fiance fights for me. I love him for that.
I’ve been with my fiance for about 11 years, We have been through a LOT together.
The one that really sticks out as a “bad date” though, is when I first started dating him. I was 15 and had started on new insulin dosages a few days prior. We went with his mother on some errands and then they stopped off at his grandmother’s house to pick something up. I knew that I was going low, but I had never told them how to handle my diabetes before then. They knew that I was diabetic, but that’s it.
So, I sat in the car, waiting for them to hurry the F up and get me home (I told them I didn’t feel good). When they came outside after their eternity long visit, I was sitting on the driveway, picking up rocks and putting them in my lap. My fiance helped me into the van and we drove home. I know that I was mumbling things to him.
He carried me into the house and laid me down on the couch. I kept trying to test my BG but kept dropping my meter. I was getting extremely frustrated because it seemed like my fingers weren’t working. I had blood all over my hands from continuously poking the tips of my fingers. Then, there was about 20 blood strips all half-used on the floor. He helped me get my reading FINALLY and I saw a 19. Then, I passed out.
I woke up to EMTs and cake frosting in my mouth.
It was about 3 months into our relationship at the time. I was 15 and he was 17. Kids dealing with life and death.
11 years later, we’re still holding on and now planning our wedding.
aw I’m sorry to hear that Jim! Hopefully she’ll understand. If she doesn’t know that you have diabetes yet, just tell her you weren’t feeling well and that you’d like another chance. If she’s a “keeper” she’ll give you another shot.
(no pun intended)
When I was 20 years old, I had a boyfriend tell me once, when he was ready to dump me (he was cheating, and so he added an extra jab in there, as to why he was cheating), that he could never marry someone with a family history of Diabetes, like myself, because his own family has a history of it, and he didn’t want to bring children into the world with the disease. While I don’t think he was cheating because of that and think it was a lot of bull on his part, I was still dumbfounded… that was the first time I had ever heard anything like that before. Heck, I didn’t even have Pre-Diabetes then.
I’ll have to say, he’s a wimp. Good thing it happened early on so you knew. I’d hate to know what would have happened if you passed out!
I’ve been fortunate, never needed any medical intervention, although the one time I wasn’t waking up, my husband was pissed off at me because I wasn’t answering his yells for me. Then he found me passed out. Too bad I wasn’t purposely ignoring him.
I love the quote
Lizmari- he was weak. Diabetes is not something that has to hold you back. And for him to not be able to see past a condition you can’t control to see your beauty, then he was an ■■■■■■■ and you didn’t need him anyway. That’s like saying “I can’t marry you because you have brown hair and I really want to have blonde children.”
I was on a second or third date with a woman. She put her arm around me and felt my pump site. Ask what it was. I told her all about it. She seemd to take it well . The next day she told me she couldnt date someone who had diabetes so bad that he needed a pump. She said she had a neighbor that lost a leg becuase of Diabetes. Guess I didnt explain it very well…
I know, how ridiculous is that! I just thought it was a made up excuse, and the dumbest thing I had ever heard anyone say…
Aw that sucks! Too bad she couldn’t ask more questions to better understand before she gave up. Tho it’s really scary for someone to get into a relationship with someone who has a chronic condition, they fail to see that when they fall in love with someone who has a condition like ours, the bond grows even tighter because of the condition.
This is one of the most romantic stories I have ever heard… Congrats on finding one of the great ones early on!
Aw thanks SugarPaige! I am a lucky girl. He is a very brave man to put up with me. 
Marps, I believe it is wonderful that you have had a long term relationship and will one day get married.
I often wonder how my daughter will meet her prince charming and if he will be diabetic or non diabetic. I have read various forums over the past 3 years and it seems there are many type 1’s not married. Maybe there needs to be a diabetic meeting/dating site. Only another type 1 can really understand what one goes through each and everyday. A life partner can be kind, caring, helping, giving, and concerned, but will never understand the feelings and emotions that are felt and the extremes they are felt for a diabetic. Marps I am not hacking on your relationship at all. I am thankful that you have found yourself, “a cream of the crop and one in a million.” I wish all diabetics could be so fortunate/blessed.
I’m a mom and can only wonder. My daughter will be 10 in April and has many years before she will be dating. It’s so sad that diabetes seems to scare so many people away. Just like jmac was describing in his story. That is so sad it makes me cry for the ignorance of others and I am really sorry that happened to you. I believe every diabetic should be loved more and more. Life itself is tough enough. (((((((((HUGS))))))))) to all of you.
MARPS!!! Special, yes… Brave to put up with you… No. But congrats on finding him…
Been there, done that, Jmac… Marps is right. If they are any kind of person at all, they will embrace the condition and want to help with it / learn about it. Sadly, those people seem to be very few in number, while the number of diabetics continues to skyrocket…
Kudos Daisycolors… and Marps as well…
No true-r words were ever spoken…
Marps, everytime I read this post, it breaks my heart… sucks that the man that owns your heart is related to one of those people that can… with just a few words… make you feel sooo bad… like less of a person because of something that you have NO control over… Wasn’t like we all chose to have this disease or that we were cursed with it because of some immoral dicision or freak exposure to something…
I am soo happy for you, having found such a wonderful person and at the same time, I hate that he ‘has’ to take up for you… That’s just rediculous, but thank-the-Lord he does…
A-men…