Today I got a Dr. Pepper at the gas station… even though I was 211 in the mid-afternoon. I havent had that kind of spike in a while (maybe 2 weeks or so). My little sister got a drink and I knew I shouldn’t get a big one, but I felt like I needed to splurge. Every time after I “splurge” I get a little guilty. So my question is, do you ever get guilty after you “splurge”? Tell me your stories, if you have one, when you have splurged, then felt guilty.
Sometimes, I always feel guilty but triumphant if I can eat pizza and still stay in control, more guilty cause it takes up to 25 units to stay in range, Most of my sugary treats come while I am working and between the work out I get on the job and the amount of water I drink during work I rarely go over 150.
To be honest, no. I’m at a point in my life where I have decided guilt is a much over-rated emotion. I just can’t be bothered. I either don’t do things that I am going to feel guilty about, or I make a choice to do the thing and accept the consequences. The only time I feel guilty, or maybe feel bad is a better word, is when I unintentionally do something that hurts someone else. Since I’m the one who I manage my diabetes for, I’m only accountable to myself, so why feel guilty? If I’m at 211 and I eat or drink something that’s going to jack me up to 300, I’m going to feel like crap and I’m going to spend the next few hours trying to correct it back down from the stratosphere and that is punishment enough (and also deterrant for the next time!). In the long run, if I screw up too much for too long I will then suffer major consequences in the form of complications and those are the best deterrant of all, but guilt? Nah, what’s the point? Now if you’d asked me the same question when I was 20? I basically felt guilty for everything all the time! So I used on my guilt quota back then.
As for splurges, when I got in recovery for my eating disorder I learned that I used food in many ways that had nothing to do with nutrition, and had to figure out other ways to deal with emotions than medicating them with food. But, yeah, everyone needs splurges. I just got two Mac brand lipsticks in the mail from Macys - way expensive but I love the deep colors and I paid another $8 for shipping to save me the aggravation of spending hours on buses and in crowded stores.
I don’t worry about ‘too much’. I try to be sensible most of the time but occasionally hitting stuff is ok. I wouldn’t drink a regular Dr. Pepper w/o bolusing though? When I had shots, I always kept my works handy in case I ran across stray potato chips.
I’m not sure you’re supposed to refer to your syringe as “works”, acidrock…lol Maybe that’s why I gravitated to the pen.
Refer to mine as my rig and my injection as shooting up or getting a fix. Some people react funny to it
I feel guilty every, single time I eat. I’m quite overweight, and type 2, so no matter what I put in my mouth, I worry that I’m hurting myself and feel guilty about it.
Well…maybe not a piece of lettuce or spinach.
I think feeling guilty about eating all the time is counterproductive and not healthy, though. The best thing would be to eat in healthy moderation, maintain a healthy weight, exercise in healthy moderation, maintain a healthy blood glucose average (A1C) to the best of my ability and never feel guilty when I give my body the fuel it needs to thrive.
That’s my goal.
Ooo, I’m going to have to read that again from a diabetes perspective. Phlilip Glass & Burroughs–we have simillar taste. The film Naked Lunch was on the late movie a few weeks ago.
“…I pulled my harpoon, from my dirty red bandana,
The driver sang while Bobby played the blues,
Windshield wipers clapping time,
I was holding Bobby’s hand in mine,
We sang every song that driver knew…”
Name that tune!
Well duh, Jim…lol. There was a time I would have thought I hit the jackpot getting all these legal needles.
Me and Bobby McGee, Jean, ask me a hard one…lol
You guys are taking me back…way back. What similarities, acidrock?
Zoe, there are some wonderful advantages to getting older, aren’t there? Things that bothered me, that I obsessed over & felt guilty about, I now shrug off. Took decades to realize & separate the important from the trivial. When I was young, too many insignificant things seemed worthy of emotional investment.
Easy Me and Bobby Mcgee
As I load my pistol
Of fine German steel
I never thought I'd be so down and out
Having my last meal
But I know I can do it
It just took a few years
As I execute my killer
The morning is near
Acidrock and or Danny should know this one
(But I had to cheat and google the lyrics…)
Oh, there definitely are, Gerri! I wouldn’t mind looking 20, but I wouldn’t want to go back to how I felt then for anything! I find it so much more comfortable in my own skin now.
I think though that for me it’s easier to look at eating adventurously as a fun challenge and to beat up food with insulin. Pa-yow
LOL took me forever to be able to inject insulin into my arm after dx.