Durable Power of Attorney

I have been working lately on my paperwork for "Adorable Power of Attorney" in appointing my sister to be the one makes decisions on my behalf. I'm 37 years old, male, never married, no children, living single. Only children I have are four legged. 4 cats and a pug.

Lately it has been on my mind what if something happens to me, what will my family do. How are they going to know what I want if I'm unable to communicate or take care of myself.

My friends have sat back and have laughed at me when they have come over to see the paper work sitting out on the table. They wondering why am I dealing with this. Told me I'm way too young to have to worry.

I sit back and have to think of the times I have had lows when no one was around, waking up from a low and being totally out of it. I've had some really bad lows where I'm in the 20s.

I worry about the issue of not waking up or being in a coma. I worry about my family not having some kind of a guide to what my wishes are along with who will handle my affairs.

I'm wondering how many out there have the same feelings and what actions have they taken?

I have a friend who is in her 60s or 70s and has had diabetes for decades. (I don't think she's aware of some of the newer research, plan to check in with her.) When her dog died a couple of years ago, she was reluctant to replace him because of these issues, but after loneliness hit, she did get a new dog and has some sort of arrangement with someone.

I don't think you are too young to do this. I'm a good bit older but I've had notes about these things for decades. One thing we did was to make an arrangement with some good friends that they would either take our dogs and cats or find someone to take them. We have a written piece of paper that we all signed and it also says we'll pay food and vet costs if they spend anything, up to a few hundred bucks.

There are various forms for what you want to happen re your medical condition and those vary according to what state you live in. Good for you for tackling it!

I'm not a lawyer but I think that you might need a Health Care Proxy to have your sister be entitled to make medical decisions on your behalf.


IMHO everyone needs to deal with this. You could slip on the ice, or get hit by car, or any number of other things, and end up in an irreversible coma. Those things have NOTHING to do with age and can happen to anyone. Diabetes is only one of the seven thousand possible things to make provision for.

I applaud you for taking this step. Too many of us do not take the time to make this happen. I have had friends who didn't even have a will when they passed away, leaving a spouse and children in limbo for months because the courts had to settle it. It was not a pleasant experience, and they ended up losing their house. And as Murphy's Law predicts, if you have it, you won't need it! Good job for planning ahead!

I also applaud you for taking this step. It is brave and realistic and wonderful. It will relieve your sister greatly when the time comes to know that she has your permission and guidance in taking charge. I know this from experience as the one who had to take over. Bravo. I believe it will also give you a certain serenity in your own heart...Blessings, my dear and well done.....Judith in Portland

Having gone through the loss of my parents and dealt with all those issues I am now faced with my aunt's situation. She is 95, lives alone in her apartment and in is her last days. I take care of her and have both power of attorney and am her executor (for her estate). And I have to tell you, I use that power on almost a daily basis on her behalf. There are two major elements that have been important, medical and financial. You can have a health care power of attorney separate from a more general power of attorney if you wish. The other thing that is important is establish a health care directive or a living will to call out your wishes. It does little good to give power of attorney to someone if they are not clear what your wishes would be. We don't always take the time to clearly communicate our wishes and people just may not listen. And besides that, if your wish is to put in place an order to withdraw life support or something, if you put that in writing you actually help your family by not forcing them to make a difficult moral decision.

Any of us, whether we have diabetes or not, can find ourselves in a situation where we can't make our decisions heard. Not matter our age or health, it is a good idea. You can do these yourself, there are software packages that help step you through (such as NOLO). You can then usually just go to a notary, some states require you to file it with them.

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If you have worry's about the final arrangements then take care of them now, this will take a lot of stress, financial burden and decision making off your care givers. Make your funeral arrangements, plan your departure, choose your final resting place and IMHO you need to make a spiritual commitment, I would recommend making this commitment every day.

My wife has a medical power of attorney, and can make any kind of financial commitments without my signature. I also have a cemetery plot...:-)

I have been through all of the steps in preparation and anticipation of my death, I'm a Cancer survivor and a organ transplant recipient...in the end my only one true advocate, has guaranteed me safe passage, has already made all the arrangements, All I need to do is show my faith and fallow him.

The Lord is with you always....

Well said, Brian...Blessings