Frustration over "bad" numbers?


#1

Reading through the fabulous book “When You’re a Parent with Diabetes”, I ran into a thought that made me sit and think:
“When you see a ‘good’ number, pat yourself in the back and note how you achieve that number so you can make similar choices in the future. If you see a ‘bad’ number, pat yourself in the back (for checking!) and consider what decisions or events caused or may have contributed to it -but only so that you can add that information to your arsenal.”

This was such a powerful thought. Though most of the time I do exactly as the book said, at times I do beat myself up over sustained highs: the numbers I can’t quite explain (or perhaps the ones I refuse to accept)… it’s certainly a day-to-day decision process, isn’t it?

What about you? How do you treat “good” and “bad” numbers?


#2

I look at the big picture, we have a goal of numbers for Tony and we shoot to get in that goal 60% of the time, life happens! That is a good thought, thanx!


#3

When I wake up to high numbers, I usually say “Why can’t someone help me with this?”. It mostly frustrates me more than anything. I don’t usually give myself any credit for good numbers.


#4

Ooooooo, my moods match my meter which I HATE!


#5

When I go high I pat myself on the back and try to be extra nice to myself. Because it’s always an accident. I try to figure out why it went high and avoid it in the future like you said. But being high feels awful and to me that is punishment enough without feeling guilty about it. We’re only human after all and I do the best I can. :slight_smile: Of course, when my numbers are good I am happy and I also feel good so that is extra happy and gives me incentive to try to keep them good.


#6

I always beat myself up for highs, because it is always what I ate, hardly ever a bad site, bad insulin, etc.

I hate highs in the a.m. as that is the longest time during the night that I can have steady bgs hence leading to fewer complications, and better A1C’s. I know this and know if I go to bed at 110, I will wake up pretty close to that, so why o why do I continue to do the bedtime snack and bolus to mess me up. 8 hours of a high is not a good thing and something I know I had total control over.

Lows anger me, but not where I blame myself, but I blame this freaking disease and the fact that it does not let me be free to garden, golf, bike ride, etc. without a low. I never blame myself for those lows but this freaking disease.

Karen


#7

Freakin’ numbers!!1 I hate them all…blood sugars, AlC’s, cholesterol, blood pressure, weight. Such a big investment in the numbers.
When home bg monitoring became widespread, I looked at an off-target number as a reflection on “just how bad” I was - not only behavior-wise, but as a person (yeah I know, makes no sense). It was like getting a report card on life, 6 times per day. I so hated that reminder that I gave up testing and rarely did so for several years.
The numbers provide valuable information, and I’m trying to learn how to get along with them.


#8

Personally, I think its much better to make numbers completely neutral, because it removes any sort of association between the number and “good” or “bad”. I agree that the number should make us consider what decisions or events caused or may have contributed to it (high or low), and we can use the experience to try and replicate it (or not) in the future, but after 31 years of living with type 1 diabetes, I have also learned that there is as much art (and a fair amount of luck, too!) as there is actual science in managing diabetes. Although I try to figure out if there was something behind the numbers, more often than not, I was following the rules and ended up with a number that was not what it should have been, and I learned not to beat myself up over it.

Instead, I prefer to remove any feeling that the number is anything more than a reading, and a tool to inform us whether we need to take any steps to move it in another direction (either to take more insulin or to eat). Once I accepted that, my feeling of irritation subsided considerably. Otherwise, I end up shaking my head and asking questions which cannot always be answered!!


#9

sigh… those numbers are a report card to me. A good number and I feel great! Anything that isn’t within 10 points of normal and I feel fussy …anything 40 points or higher can downright depress me. Sometimes, Frustration is so great at a too high number that I just give up and eat whatever I want knowing that I will get an even higher number for the rest of the day. Then, I just move on to the next day and start over.
Diabetes + my Turtle-Stubborn … or as my husband says “Pertinaciousness” LOL! that word was found in a thesaurus! It bascially means more obstinate,stubborn and just totally MORE! We got such a great laugh out of him finding that word to describe me! ( It totally fits.)


#10

I know how you feel! I get really upset when I go really low and sometimes I start crying because it feels so bad. And it makes me so mad when it effects daily activities like that. It’s like walking a tight rope all the time!


#11

Ideally, I try to approach my numbers as a tool to control my diabetes. I say “Ideally” because I always have an initial reaction of some kind first. If they are wonderfully normal, I start to think that the diabetes might be going away. If they are high, I’m disappointed and somehow feel like I’ve done something wrong. Highs always bring me down to the reality of being sick or feeling broken. Going low really unsettles me and typically makes me a little afraid of the insulin. Again I think, “If I’m going low, then I don’t need it…” In the end, I’m now trying to use the numbers constructively, and I’m very thankful I was always good in math!


#12

I have had D so long that I really look at these numbers as a point in which I can do better. I had rather have the high numbers as opposed to the low numbers so I know I won’t fall out and cannot remember anythig but then again that’s just my opion.


#13

Oh yehhh this is a problem of mine. I TRY not to worry too much about highs, after all, at least I tested and can deal to it.

I’m getting better - most days I just see a number and take action. If I’m too high though, I’m grumpy! and I DO take it personally, and it DOES feel like a failure. I’m fine once I deal to it though.

It takes practice to not take it as a personal failure. But none of us are always sitting pretty along the lower end of the scale with gentle little peaks once in a while. If that was possible none of us would be here, we’d have nothing to talk about - and in fact, I guess we wouldn’t be diabetics!


#14

I get frustrated and angry. Not at myself. I am doing what I should. I am frustrated that my body does not respond as I expected it should. I am frustrated that the best I can do is take a shot and wait and see. I eat the same thing for breakfast each and every morning yet get a inconsistent results from day to day.


#15

I was typing up my husbands bg levels for the last couple weeks for the first time to send to the diabetic nurse as we want to change him over to humulog and lantis from R and N. He wanted me to not include some of the highs and the lows. he said it was like someone reading his diary…
He gets mad over the highs and I get mad over the lows :slight_smile: