I wanted to expand on a topic that Kerri started on her blog today. (www.sixuntilme.com) Kerri tells of an experience where she was listening to a speaker say that when a person controls their diabetes, there are no complications. “None”. Those of us with T1 or who manage kids with T1, know that isn’t true. We are smart enough to know that complications arise even with the best laid plans, management, diligence and care. I do have to say though, that I agree with the speaker to an opposite notion…if I don’t manage the diabetes, I will most certainly have issues. Kerri goes on to speak about having felt guilty in the past or having others thrust guilt upon her due to them not being educated in the world of the Big D.
It got me to thinking, am I teaching my kids to feel guilty over their diabetes?
I had to stop, sit back in my chair and really think. I have never told my kids, “you can’t have that or it will hurt you”. I have, however, told them that if they don’t manage their diabetes that “this” can and most likely will happen. I have worked pretty hard to make them understand that they have to go with the flow, that even if they stick to the plan…outcomes may not match the input. But, I have seen Marty get very upset when his number is over 11 or in the 200’s. “I don’t understand, what did I do wrong?”
I wonder if it’s just a feeling that I should expect my kids to have? A feeling that results inevitably from having a 24/7 disease that will never go away. But do I add to it? I have to say, I don’t feel that I do…but that doesn’t mean that my kids don’t feel that I do. I will definitely be bringing this up today. I need to ensure that I am not adding guilt to their lives about D. I need to do a personal self evaluation with their input. It’s important. I don’t want them growing up feeling helpless or guilty in any way, shape or form if they are doing their best. I mean honestly, I am an Italian Mom. I am sure I can find better things to give them guilt trips over. Things they can control…like the socks on the floor, or all of the clean laundry being shoved into one drawer…