I got out of my way & Celebrating a small victory!

So my daughter Sarah is 10 and she’s had Type 1 since she was 5 years old, 6 weeks shy of her 6th birthday.

She’s an amazing kid and on most days is a trooper with her diabetes but our appointment at the beginning of January with our endo was heart-breaking. Sarah’s A1C was 9.4! Part of that was due to a vial of bad insulin, part of that was Christmas and New Years, but the main part was that Sarah wouldn’t bolus for anything she ate. She was running high every day and I couldn’t get her to care.

We have an amazing social worker as part of our team and at that appointment he told us to stop focusing on the numbers and start to focus on developing good habits. So we went home and tried all sorts of various things, but I was still frustrated that Sarah wasn’t taking any responsibility at all, and it’s surprising because she’s a very mature and responsible kid.

So I thought I would ask you guys and started writing a post asking for ideas of what to do when it hit me… Sarah had no motivation to take responsibility because I had it all! In my efforts to protect her, help her, and shield her, as well as my motivation as a people-pleaser to have good numbers, I had taken over all the responsibility for her diabetes to the point where she had no reason to want to do anything!

I deleted the post, more than chagrined with myself. So I sat down and had a talk with Sarah, I just said that I had been doing everything and I wasn’t doing a good job, and she was more than capable and more than likely could do a better job than I could, and it was encouraging how well she responded. She took the torch and started running with it and I’m so happy to say she started bolusing. She’s also learned how to upload her meters to diasend and loves to check her numbers, and since that day I am continually surprised when we check her blood and her numbers are in range, it’s crazy.

And then this week at our endo appointment we got the proof that this is working… in three months Sarah’s A1C had dropped almost a whole point to 8.5!!! It was all her. And even though we still have some work to do, and need to drop her A1C more, I’m confident that with her in the drivers seat we will succeed. And boy, was it ever nice to have a happy appointment, I didn’t even cry!

And I love that I can come here and share this with all of you, people who actually understand. :slight_smile:

Happy Easter!

11 Likes

Just terrific news Mom, I’m so happy for you. Probably the best lesson I learned here is not to look at the numbers as a “grade” or think of them as “bad” or “good”. I’m not completely finished learning this lesson, but I never hesitate to check my blood sugar any more because I anticipate getting a “bad” number. I have trained myself to say “wow, I’m glad I caught that now instead of later”.

Of course it’s yours to delete, but I feel our community would be completely understanding of your chagrin, and not be judgemental. You had the courage to come here and post your struggle, it’s actually quite brave, I’m glad you got some good ideas and made the changes you did.

and big big kudos to Sarah!!

I love this! You empowered her and she blossomed!!

Congratulations to both you and your daughter!
Is she using an insulin pump or MDI? As a T1, digging out a flex pen to bolus for meals, was inconvenient and always made me feel different from my friends and school chums many years ago. With a pump, I could be much more discreet when I blouses.

She’s on a pump, got it on her 7th birthday. But she always complained about having to push the buttons and being a kid still doesn’t like to take the time to do it, but she’s getting better.

That’s great news. I’ve found it difficult to know when to pass something on to Caleb. I’ve found he usually takes things on without me having to think about it too much - the progression has been mostly organic. It happens bc in life he wants to do something that requires more independence, so we talk about what that will require from him with regard to his diabetes care. When I’ve tried to pass things on just for the sake of passing things on, we’ve been less successful. Life tends to guide us and it’s worked out well, one step at a time, some steps bigger than others.

Congrats. Sounds like a big victory, not a small one. :slight_smile: