Hell everyone, i havent been on here in about a week because i was on making my way to the states from spain. and this is where my problem lies. i live and was diagnosed in seville. i am t1 for seven months now and while reaaly scary at first, ive settled in and things are good. ive got used to eating out and counting carbs, still honeymooning and after some anger im alright about this.
i went down to malaga for a couple of days and everything was fine there.
and then i got to my family in new york. i was here for xmas but i was three weeks into it and it was a bit different. im here now, almost a pro, and i am having such a hard time with this D, psychologically. it is like going back to the beginning, being angry again, feeling very hard done by. a couple of months ago i was able to get by without fast acting, just on basal and im doing everything i can to not take fast acting now, trying to "teach this diabetes a lesson", living on coffee and salad. part of it is being angry and feeling out of control again, feeling very deprived with all the nyc/usa food (think pizza, italian ices, 8 gazillion flavours of ice cream) and then im afraid im going to get fat here, because it happens any summer im here! this is not buying in.
my mom is the most wonderful person in the world, generous and fun but cannot understand D, saying things like, "at least its not cancer", and "you just have to deal with it". ugggh. she is a nurse!
i am disappointed in myself for feeling like this. i know i am not the first one to feel this way, but really? i dont want to be on holiday and not be on holiday from diabetes. this is not buying in. im going backwards. any advice to get myself going forwards again?