Out of state--

I recently took my trip out to the East coast (Madison, NJ) for graduate school. I make the trek every six months as my program dictates and this was my second to last visit there. I have graduation and final thesis due this summer. I am writing this because I wanted to kind of verbalize an issue that came up while I was there:

I had talked with those I was close with in the program and told them the situation-- I am on a carb counting, sliding scale and can eat whatever fits in my carb value based on the insulin mount I dose with. These people understood. I was having balanced meals and trying to be good, but that tiny piece of Oreo cake got to my by the end of the week. I had dosed more than the meal counted for, thinking there were heavier carb options only (really it was salmon and tofu) so I had some room to play with. I had an Oreo cake, for sure. about a 2X2 slice.

I thought I had 40 mothers in the program. Every, single woman there tried to shame me into not eating it or were worried about me having that. Too much sugar, too much whatever. I had to go over this with them and explain that the carbs were within my limit and, while I wouldn’t be eating TONS of sweets, I could still have a treat on occasion. My sugar never got above 150. It was incredibly frustrating for me to be there and have so many people over my shoulder. I have a friend who was my designated medical helper. He held my extra meter and glucose tabs in case I had an issue, plus he wasn’t hawking like everyone else was, not even close. I was pretty surprised. Does this sort of thing happen often? I mean, I get all kinds of advice from diabetics on how and what to do, though their regimen wouldn’t work for me, and that I can handle. But this kind of mothering? Sheesh. I am thankful for the concern, but I don’t need 45-50 people looking out for my best interest when there are people in the know doing it with me. You know?

I feel you! I am back in college and I get this kind of thing every once in a while when I am around a new group. I have my group who knows me and they have my back and know what to do but them there is the D police who seem to think they have to take over and mom me to death ugh it kills me. I just tell them I got this and move on.

Yes it does happen all the time. Last week there were doughnuts at work and a co worker said to me “well you can’t have that”. And Friday we had a meeting and I ate 2 cookies (running on the low side). No one said anything but I got disapproving stares. Sometimes when it happens my friend will silently hand me another cookie or something and we will crack up. But it can be annoying.

When people ask me ‘Should you be eating that?’ I usually respond with ‘Should YOU be eating that?’…they never know what to say.

Thats a pretty good response Kari. I think its just something I am struggling with as a new diabetic and someone who really enjoys doing their own thing, not being mothered over. Makes me feel icky when people get that way.

Kari’s response is terrific. In time you will get to know your own body and your diabetes better and you will develop trust in doing your own thing.