I guess with my current issue of stress fractures coming up again. I guess i am beginning to question if some things i have done in the past our coming back to haunt me. I had a couple of years as a teenager where my diabetes was not in perfect control and yes i was fighting myself about being diabetic. My concern goes back to high school and my early twenties where i was extremely obsessed with exercise and dieting. I am not sure if you would call me anorexic but i tend to believe that is the truth of the matter. I had two periods in my life where i lost more than 60lbs in three month period of time and continued to want to lose more weight. I still have pictures of me 5’11 at 119 lbs which is quite small for some one as tall as i am. My mother then recognized that i was having issue and got me to start eating more and exercising less.
My mother and my sister have both battled with this obsessive nature of the beast of wanting to be thin. It also does not help that my family has history of osteoporosis. I am not really sure if my current injury is from my excessive dieting or just my family history osteoporosis. I have had a bone density done this year and i have osteopenia.
I really wish i knew what i know now about what dieting can do to your body and the consequences of over exercising can do to the body. I guess now the only thing i can do is own it and try to move on. I have learned quite a lesson from my need to be thin and how it is not worth all the damage it has caused.