**insert cute greeting to everyone here**

Hello everyone!

My nickname is Squibble, but my real name is much more mundane… DeAnna… I was very recently diagnosed with T2 Diabetes (10/10/2008), and to tell you all the truth, I was scared out of my freaking mind… and in a slight way, kind of relieved… I’ve been experiencing some “small” health problems–swolen feet, constant congestion, recurring yeast infection, and some other things to boot, but not all at once-- but the doctors would treat my symptoms and never search for a reason or a “cure” for them. Basically give me meds, a “bandaid” and pat me on the back and say take these, if you don’t feel better, come back, I’ll gladly give you some more… The “relief” was knowing that most of my “problems” were due to Diabetes… ok… now I have a name, and reason… ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh sh*****TTTTTTTT (not sure if swearing is allowed in the forums) I have Diabetes… lots and lots of crying ensued for the first week… I finally got an appointment for my Diabetes Clinic (Diabetes America) after living the weekend with about 35 carbs per day–carbs were BAD!!! My A1c was 12 and my BG was 284 when I was being examined at the clinic. Though, the two days at the doctor’s office–who initially dx’d me, I was 304 and 317… I did not know that I was sick… that is the scary part… ya know?

Granted, it’s only been 18 days since my dx, but I have definately changed alot of my old habits… and I think and read and think harder before ANYTHING crosses my lips… and knowing that I will be doing that for the rest of my life… just makes my perspective on life a bit more open…

I was wondering… if any of you felt depression or guilt or the like when you initially were dx’d? My emotions have definately run the gambit… I don’t ever want to attempt to forget that I have Diabetes, but a cure would be wonderful, and not just because it is me, but because, since my dx, I’ve come to realise just HOW many people are affected AND effected by this disease… from tiny babies to geriactrics… every race, creed, gender and age can be affected…

Anyway… heh… I was just saying hello…

waves nervously and bashfully


Squibble –

Welcome aboard!

I definitely felt the depression when I was diagnosed - luckily, pharmaceuticals and medical professionals being what they are, it can be gotten under control. Guilt I didn’t have, but that’s probably because I was diagnosed as type 1, which means there ain’t squat I could have done differently.

Sounds like you’re doing all the right things, so keep it up!

– Dov

thanks Dov, for the encouragement. I don’t think I mentioned this but, since my initial dx, my BG is now, around 120 pre breakfast. They’re only having me test my BG once a day, and if I want to, after my dinner… not sure if this is… “correct proceedure” or if they’re just “getting me used to it all” because, even after extensive research online before I went to the clinic… I was rather overwhelmed. Mostly because I didn’t know much other than “the D word.” shrugs I go back in about 2 weeks, and I’m kinda excited already, since I seem to have done so well…

Hi Squibble (aka DeAnna),

Glad you’re here, glad you found us–welcome! Don’t be nervous or bashful here. It’s a safe place to explore & talk about whatever you like, whenever you like.

My husband took me to the ER with 809 BG. I didn’t know I was sick enough to have died & thought I had the flu. Talk about feeling stupid.

Our bodies start adusting to slowly creeping up BG. Lots of people don’t know until they’re ill enough to get properly diagnosed & sadly doctors often miss the early symptoms.

I was diagnosed in late May, Type 1. I’m a newbie, too, & have learned more through Tu D than from my doctors, nurses, certified diabetic educator (CDE) & the useless diabetic ed classes I attended. Realize it looks daunting, but try to read some of the archived threads. Tons of great info.

I was in shock when I was diagnosed. Anger, fear, worry, anxiety, dread, depression accompanied my every waking moment. Hell yes, on the depression & anger. Who wouldn’t be depressed! Guilt–nope. Have heard so many people here talk of guilt & shame. Now, that makes me angry! To think that someone has to deal with everything associated with a diabetes diagnosis & feel guilt to boot. Wonder if people feel guilty about other medical conditions?

Seems to me, that you’re doing far better than many people–kudos & hugs! Lots of people go into denial. So, yay for you for taking this head on. It’s a condition of control, personal control & you’ve got what it takes.

You definitely need to be testing more than once a day. Can’t stress this enough. Ridiculous & irresponsible to be told otherwise. You need to test first thing when you wake up (before eating), before meals, two hours after meals & right before bed. Keep a log of your numbers & what you eat. No way to get a handle on BG without knowing where you stand. Have your dr. write you an Rx for test strips for testing 10x a day so you don’t run out.

Get thee to an endo pronto.

Thanks Gerri!!

My guilt stems mostly because I am over weight and I’ve been told by the three docs that I’ve seen recently, that if I were to lose 100 pounds I would probably be in remission… So by my not watching what I eat–until now–I feel that I have done this to myself…

HOWEVER, I do know that I cannot go back in the past and undo what I have already done, all that I can do is to look forward and do the best I can for myself, my loverly husband, and my family (no children, but a couple nieces and a nephew and a brother) from here on out.

As far as the testing… I am a bit confused… heh… I had horrible diarreah the other day at work, I did NOT have my BG kit with me, as I’ve only been told to test the one time a day… but I felt feverish and just horrible most of the day… I called my clinic’s 24 hour hotline, talked to a nurse, and her first question to me was “what is your BG?” I’m like, I have no clue… I was told to only test once or twice a day, but mostly the once a day… she was a little astounded at that…as I’m sure you all are… I went home, checked my BG and it was 140, which is high, but not what I’ve seen… so it wasn’t my Diabetes, seems I had contracted some sort of stomach bug, just for a little while, because I ate a little, took a nap and felt all better… weird… and my Dr did write me an Rx for strips, its just that money is really tight right now and I’m hoping the sample strips they gave me at the clinic will last until Friday–payday…

I’ve been rather scared and hesitant to post here… but I’m glad I did…

Thank you :slight_smile: huggles


Hey Squibble…don’t ever be scared or hesitant here. There are so many knowledgeable, but mainly friendly people on this site…it is such a great resource.
One problem for those of us that knew nothing about Diabetes at diagnoses is that the 2 main types, 1 and 2, are different in causes and usually, treatment. The testing once a day instruction is not unusual for T2’s, I gather. You are lucky in most likely being able to help your situation through lifestyle changes. Check out some past T2 forum topics. There is so much information there. You’ll see Dr Bernstein mentioned often…he is a bit controversial in his recommendation for very low carb intake, but his books are great learning tools.
Keep asking questions,
Good luck and welcome.

Yep, you can’t undo the past–move forward–that’s the only productive attitude there is. You go, girl. Guilt is useless, paralyzing.

A very dear friend of mine is a large woman, a very large woman. She’s the healthiest person I know. Her lipids are perfect, her cardio health is perfect, everything health wise is perfect. She’s active, brilliant & beautiful. She’s gotten grief her entire life for being “fat.” She’s now a professor of women’s studies, published in respected journals & lectures on body image & the politics of fat. Her work is pretty radical & awesome. Lots & lots of misinformation out there about obesity & health. Not saying that losing weight won’t help your Type 2, but please don’t beat yourself up.

Go back to the clinic & don’t be shy about asking for more strips. They get them free. Strips are so expensive. We all struggle with this. I now view strips as currency. Hmm, this item is the equivalent of _# of strips:) I look for free meter offers on-line because they come with free strips. You want to stick with one brand of meter for consistency, but your brand may show up in a freebie offer. Just say you use another brand when you fill out the form.

Just in case your doctor didn’t mention this, being sick, having an infection can raise BG a lot. Sometimes we can tell before all the symptoms show that we’ve got an infection just from testing.

Second Elaine’s suggestion about checking out Dr. Bernstein. Low carb does help tremendously with greater control, lower BG. Low carb means being able to count carbs. Several good on-line carb counters & it’s not hard. There are also some great sites with low carb recipes. You’ll lose weight quickly. Go to www.diabetesincontrol.com. At the bottom of the home page there are links for archived writers (think that’s what it’s called), Click on that & then Dr. B from the drop down menu. They’ve got whole chapters from his book.

Keep in touch!

Huggles, back.

Hi Squibble

It’s nice to meet you!

I was diagnosed in April this year, so I remember pretty clearly how it feels. I was initially shocked, but also relieved that the reason I was feeling so tired all the time had finally been discovered. I don’t have a final diagnosis of Type 1 or 2 yet, but I definitely feel guilty for being overweight at the time I was diagnosed. Reading Jenny’s website, here, really helped me. The good news is that now you know what the problem is, so you can tackle it head on. Congrats on your good start!

Hello and welcome to the club,

I can really relate. My dx was in May and I spend the first three weeks scared to leave the house because I had no idea how anything would affect my bg.(T1) Ah, fun times.

I didn’t become depressed during that time, but I felt a bit guilty. I’ve had all the telltale symptoms for a while before I finally went to see a doctor. (took him all of three seconds to make a diagnosis) Maybe that could have prevented later complications. What if I already had caused some nerve damage etc because I didn’t go sooner? I managed a a1c of 16,2 after all.

Such thoughts are completely useless of course. I knew nothing about diabetes and have no family history of it. I never would have connected the dots on my own. All I can do right now is take good care of myself and accept whatever may come my way without worrying about it too much.

Anyway, this is a great community. Everyone is so helpful and nice it’s almost scary. :wink:


I haven’t checked the T2 forums yet, but when I get home from work a lil later this morning (beings I just woke up to go to work) I WILL check it out… I do know there are several different types of D, and different treatments for them all.

Thank you very much for your encouragement, Elaine huggles

All this positive feedback… is amazing… most everyone around me knows nothing, or very little at least… thank you, just for being you!

I had NO clue I could go back to the clinic and ask for more strips!! jaw drops it had not occurred to me that that would have been an option… wow… thanks Gerri!!

I still, right now at least, cannot help but to feel upset at myself for “letting myself go” for such a long time and get my health so bad, but I am sure once I know that it wasn’t all my fault that I have D… wow, this makes no sense, but it does to me, I guess… mostly, I guess since I’m so newly dx’d that there are still questions that no one has answers to, just yet, that I will do as I have always done and taken the blame for any “wrong doing.” heh, but I do KNOW that my BG is up, not because of what I eat, it’s the disease… though… haha, I do know that if I eat something “bad” that it IS my fault if my BG is up too…haha --catch 22–

Again, Gerri, thanks so much for the encouragement!!

Debb, the moment I found out, and could get myself home, all I did was read… read, read… though, unfortunately I did not find this friendly place until a couple days ago…tho ugh, granted, it’s been just a few weeks since my dx… though it seems a long time ago already…

I have been put on a 2000 calorie meal plan with my clinic… I don’t count calories as much as I count carbs… my “target” is 45-60 carbs per meal… plus some protein and fats to go along with them… I dont’ know if I have lost weight as the Lantus is “supposed” to make me gain weight, but I’m also on Lisinopril for my kidneys, which is supposed to help me lose weight? I think, and I’m also on Metformin, not sure what all it does other than help my liver “not act up” and produce too much glucose…

Most of my life I’ve been trying to lose weight in some fashion or another… hell, I even went on the Atkins diet for a couple of months… I lost about 40 pounds, but it was the holiday season and my sister-in-law can’t cook anything Atkins friendly, so I kinda went off of it then…and didn’t go back…so I know all about the yo-yo diet thing…

NOW I am on a lifestyle change… everything I eat I think about carbs, no carbs, fat, no fat, etc… not sure how it’s working as far as dropping pounds, but my BG seems to like it :slight_smile:

Yes, that fat lady in the mirror that I see, has very pretty eyes, and hair… and I’m doing my best to not hurt her feelings when it comes to the rest of her!!

Thanks so much for the encouragment!! huggles

HI Megan!

Yes, for me as well, knowing the dx as to my tiredness and many other things… was a relief… but still farkin scary too… still is scary, though there are so many who’re like 'oh it’s just Diabetes." JUST??? sure, you can say that because your pancreas isn’t revolting on you… hehe

Thanks for your encouragement!!! huggles

Hello Kat!

I am definately glad that I have joined the community! You are correct, everyone has been so helpful and kind… it’s amazing!!

I agree, negative thoughts don’t need to be around us, especially coming from our own heads, but I know too, that there are times when none of us can help but to think negatively… I’m working on that aspect, and just looking forward and doing the best I can for myself daily. Thinking before I eat or do things… that’s the important thing for me… thinking ahead… and READING labels and reading EVERYTHING… I’m sure we all do that

I was OCD before, but now, if I don’t know any sort of fragment of a nutrition label, I refuse to eat it!! Better safe than sorry…

huggles and thanks for the add!!

Hiya Squibble, glad to have you aboard. This is a great place to learn and make friends. I was dx’d about 7 years ago with T2 and since then it has progressed to T1, I don’t feel guilty, my mother was a diabetic and it was almost inevitable that one of her daughters would get it and that would be me. I totally agree with Debb, it does no good to look down on yourself, it only makes matters worse. I did this for quite a few years, now I just manage it and try to keep my numbers down. And they will go up and down, stress, illness and hormones will effect your numbers. You just have to adjust accordingly. I don’t worry about my weight so much anymore as long as my numbers stay low and I feel good, it is all in how you look at life. It is hard sometimes, and depression does set in at times, but I just pick myself up and say, this is how it is, you have to move on and live your life. I have other health issues as well and these keep me on my toes as well, I have Fibromyalgia, and I am bipolar. The pain is something that will make my numbers higher too, so I try and keep moving to keep the pain down to about a 6 or 7, that is pretty manageable for me, the bipolar is a whole other ball of wax, that is something that has to be controlled with meds, and even with the meds I might still have an episode (crosses fingers and knocks on wood). You just chin up and keep the faith, you are well on your way. Again glad to have you here. Take Care and lots of Blessings, Beth

Hello Beth, and thank you for your encouragement!!

I am doing the best that I know how, right now…

I wish you the best and lots of blessings as well!!

huggles thank you so much!

The more you learn, the better it gets. You will make alot of friends and get lots of advice, we are all just one big family here.
Blessed Be, Beth

I saw something recently - don’t recall where - that recent studies indicate that T2s on oral meds don’t need to test as often, and there’s no therapeutic benefit to frequent testing. That being said, I see you’re taking shots, so if you’re taking insulin, you MUST test more frequently. I never leave home without my meter, and I keep a spare in my desk at work as well.