Early yesterday morning, I dreamt that I was taking lessons to fly a plane…I was for some reason sitting next to my copilot tilted back in the seat, facing up to the sky rather than ahead (I know this doesn’t make sense…but it’s a dream) and waiting to take off, but there was a stream of delays…very frustrating and then just as it seemed we were finally, my alarm clock went off… I had set it to test myself in the middle of the night… and it was within range for me (126) so I went back to sleep and woke up at 44…
I treated it, ate breakfast, bolused, went to work…only to find out that I had just one test strip left in the kit I leave at work… and of course it would be on a day that started out rough… so I pondered when would be the best time to use this one strip? I still felt hazy from the low and wanted to test to make sure that it had indeed fully corrected, but I felt okay…so decided to wait for lunch…but then decided since I felt okay to wait and do 1hr pp after lunch… cause I would rather at this point correct a high if need be later on…or something like that…(thinking about it now…not really sure what I was thinking)…
But got distracted at work …and the documents were getting more and more difficult to read…I must be tired since I was up fairly late last night…got a latte w/soy milk (and splenda and cinnamon) very delcicious but it was still difficult and it seemed like the pages would kind of disappear… and then it seemed my mouth was going numb…and finally decided to test myself… and it was 48… and thinking… why didn’t I think of this sooner but at the same why did I do that….because before it seemed easier to ignore the symptoms, but that now that I was too fully aware of it…and it felt more intense (though I think now the reverse might be true as well…) and I only had two glucose tabs left…I took them…found some skittles that had fallen out of a bag…and ate about 10 of those…but the numbness and general inability to think and the strong desire to sleep or at least block out the external world persisted… which is why I hate lows much much more than highs…because at least when you’re high it’s easier to function… or at least to push through the symptoms… and to maintain control… whereas lows for me anyways are more unpredictable in their effects and often seem to take my mind hostage once it gets past a certain point…it wasn’t until about 3 hours later that I felt fully functional again…but I made it…luckily for me there were not pressing deadlines at work and I work fast so made up for it today…
I’m still not entirely sure what was up with those two lows… maybe the lantus kicked in faster or the bolus was too much from dinner (which was at 11pm)… this unpredicatably of injected basal insulins was one of the reasons why I had originally switched to the pump since it seems to give a smoother delivery… but I’ll just have to discuss this at the upcoming endo appt.
Maybe I should have titled this post Irrational Thinking and Hypoglycemia…but then dreams too have their own kind of strange logic and events that defy reasoning…
