You know, I found that I was blaming myself a lot like you were. Then I realised, even though I technically knew, that lows really do cause me to be angry and feel despair. It was a good day when I decided to give myself a break, because I do tend to abuse myself a lot with negative self talk. When diabetes makes me feel rotten, I try to breathe and tell myself I can try again tomorrow. When I’m in a real diabetes bind I call up or e-mail my CDE, she helps me when I don’t have the strength to do it on my own 
And yes, I often want to eat my fridge when I’m low. Do you have any Dex tabs handy? I find having a good supply of those around keeps me from eating the fridge. And peanut butter on whole wheat toast! It helps keep you steady
I am one NOT with amazing control compared to some with an A1C of lower the 6 ...and I am here to tell the story :) ...30 plus years with diabetes , no complications that anyone knows of ...have had so far an amazing life with diabetes , which is sometimes the pitts ..ask my Hubby !! As a Canadian I stay connected with the Canadian Diabetes Association and this has served me well ..I did receive the Queem's Jubilee Medal ...we are all different and I surely have had my SAD times !!
I wish you well cat !!
Me too! I can’t believe how much I consumed in the middle of last night - OJ, chocolate milk. Sweating and shaking. It messes with my whole day sometimes.
Carrying Dex tabs EVERYWHERE helps, and checking BG before going anywhere also helps with confidence. But I also feel wronged somehow when my insulin needs change and I have to come up with a new regimen. Like everything should just stay the same for a while - but it doesn’t. And needing more insulin makes me feel a bit like a failure! I always talk through the changes, with my husband or whoever is around, and even though I know they are usually just nodding politely without really getting it, that makes me feel a little stronger about it.
I haven't let my blood sugar drop below 70 n a long time. When I get lows, they happen so fast and my blood sugar drops so fast it terrifies me! I'm already insulin sensitive so I check my blood sugar a lot and tend to keep it higher than I should for fear of lows. I am CONSUMED with negative self-talk, even bought a book recently "stop being mean to yourself" haha. I blame myself for keeping my blood sugars higher than they should be and then I blame myself when things get unpredictable. The whole situation is just unmanageable. Hoping a new endo/diabetes team/fresh start will give me the courage to work my numbers down
I love the Avengers and Iron Man movies, and you are so right, Tim. Cat, the Avengers will take your mind off your cares and woes, and Ruffalo is great. I get the Hulk SMASH urge when high!
OH, I know how you feel. I had such a bad low now i'm 183 wanting to go to bed. I start my Omnipod training tomorrow but I know that too is going to be another weeks, months worth of adjustments. I feel like you do, this is unbearable sometimes, I can't take this for one more day...all over the place, up down, high low...feel like sh!t everyday. I mean, this is completely insane. I'm going to see someone, a therapist, because I just can't frickin stand this anymore, ya know.
seriously, like how is someone (we, type 1's) supposed to live a normal frickin life like this, this feels like just too damn much sometimes. so much of a toll it takes, sometimes.
what a great inspiration. thanks for your honesty
i think therapy is a great idea. I wanna start again too. I know acceptance is THE answer to this stuff. And yes some days are worse than others. I have such fear about lows, it keeps me from living a normal life. I know I''m more insulin sensitive than most and my blood sugar plummets faster than most diabetics i've met, but I see that we all deal with the frustration. I would love to be at 183 and be comfortable right now!
I feel you on that. My boyfriend is my "type 3" helper, and I talk thru stuff with him. "wronged", yes. FURIOUS!! and hopeless, too.
i just read on my FB page that my friend's husband's co-worker's daughter, OK that's a long intro, 15 years old just died from diabetes - insulin shock, went to bed and didn't wake up. I know we all know this, this can happen, it's rare but lows hit. I'm really rethinking my aggression with my control. I was going to attempt maybe high 5 A1C's but what's the point. After yesterday, I'm really going to loosen up on my control. I am overly aggressive with my insulin because I don't feel well, at all, with highs and correct anything over 130 because everyone one here says anything above 140 causes damage, there's no research to support this. IDK about any of this sometimes..ugh!
how completely tragic. I know for a fact with the way my insulin needs shift every few days and with the way my lows hit that it wouldn't be safe for me to stay under 140. I'm considering an even more restricted diet to maybe shoot for 150-180, which is less than ideal but I can't risk it.
This sort of story is tragic and I do think care should always be taken, but in my view the risks are highly inflated. Consider that insulin shock therapy was a standard of care for thousands of patients. A typical treatment was 50-60 comas induced with 100-450 units of insulin. Mortality risks varied, but ranged from 1-5% (for the whole treatment of 50-60 comas). If this was truly insulin shock, it may have been more complicated than simply a hypo caused by too much basal.
So how does this translate to us? I think if you choose to correct a 140 mg/dl 3 hours or so after a meal with a single unit that brings you down 50 mg/dl, that is a quite unreasonable and rational thing to do.
i agree, it's very rare but it does happen. we ALL plummet if we take too much insulin. Cat, we all have to deal with this but you have to get within 'normal blood sugar levels'. maybe get a CGM....you can aim for 90's to 130's or 140's...but running 150 isn't good either. it takes a while to get adjusted to normal blood sugars, you will feel 'low' even if you're not, same theory about us who keep tight control, anything close to high feels awful, at least for me, or it's not so much the number it's the climb or drop.
oh sarah, I know you mean well <3 but we aren't all built the same! I have a CGM and I test about 20-25x/day. My insulin needs change every few days and I feel like I'm usually chasing the changes (though not often as drastically as this one!) It's not just as simple as plummeting when I've taken too much insulin. Thanks for your kind words though
mine change every few days too, most people's change all the time, that's the nature of this beast. if you're testing 25 times a day, that's like every hour, of course you'll see changes, our blood sugars change from minute to minute and testing too much, so much, will not provide any better data. hope you can to terms with your fear and back to better blood sugars, lower your doses in you're dropping too much.
Good and sensible advice
and I wish more doctors gave advice like this instead of sending people off with horror stories
Sarah, I wish it was that easy. I’ve worked with several specialists to try to figure out why I have such drastic shifts and such marked insulin sensitivity after 20 years with this disease. The fact is, some people just have a tougher time with their diabetes than others for whatever reason. I used to feel really isolated in the diabetes community when people didn’t understand but I’m learning there are others like me, and people only know the cross they bear.