How so, you ask? Well, what I hadn’t realised was that the charge exemption form was valid for only five years, at which point a new form would be issued asking you to confirm that ‘you still have the condition declared on your original application’. Result! All I need to do is tick the box that says ‘No’ and I will no longer have diabetes!
Of course, I still have diabetes you fools! Unless I have somehow missed the earth-shattering news that a cure has been found for the disease affecting over 300 million people worldwide, which seems a little unlikely, I still have diabetes. Ah well, we can but hope!
My diabetes is due to expire,
I’ve got about three years remaining,
For my friend got a letter that implied she’d get better,
And we all found it most entertaining!
Bureaucracy dictates that our diabetic fates
Lie in answering just one simple question,
‘Since last you applied, please confirm or deny
Can your pancreas cope with glucose ingestion?’
Could it be, all along, that the doctors are wrong,
And diabetes is not a lifetime affliction?
Tick the right box – you’re cured, that’s one diabetic fewer,
And you won’t need those horrid prescriptions!
It’s a ‘no’ then from me – I am diabetes-free!
And I’m off to the pub for some drinking!
And I’ll eat what I like with no fear of a spike!
Dr Banting, what on earth were you thinking?