Has anyone ever had someone be super unsupportive of your choice to pump? I was at dinner the other night with my mom and I broke out my pump to bolus. No one noticed it, but she did and said “I just don’t get you. It’s just so much of a hassle to live with that thing. I just don’t understand why you can’t do pills and shots.” When I bring up my pump, she gets all distant and nasty with me, like it’s an annoyance to her. Even when I break it out at meals to do a quick bolus, she gets agitated. I just don’t get it.
I’ve explained to her MULTIPLE times that all of the orals make me sick. I’ve failed all of them. I was sick of shots and don’t always have time to cover for meals. This pump is, at least for me, a lifesaver.
I just don’t get it. Does anyone else have the same thing and if so, what do you do, besides ignore them?
Wow, sorry that you have that you have to deal with this Laura.
I haven’t experienced this type of reaction, but I often see that my acquaintances think that my pump is a “snobby” thing (like I think that I am too good for shots). Of course, none of them need shots or a pump!! So I just figure that they don’t “get it”.
Wow, can I relate, Laura! My mother also “doesn’t get it.” She doesn’t understand anything about my diabetes, and she often tells me that I need to “just take care of that.” As if it will suddenly go away if I “take care of it.”
My theory is that she doesn’t really care to learn about T1 diabetes because I didn’t get it when I was a child. She never had to care for me, test my blood, calculate boluses, etc., so it doesn’t affect her. Her only experience with diabetes has been T2 in distant relatives.
When I’ve tried to explain to her that without insulin I will die, she says, “oh, please stop being so dramatic” or “I doubt it’s that serious.” Or my personal favorite, “maybe if you lost some weight, it would go away.” Ugh . . . mothers!
Just let it roll off of you. You’re doing what’s best for your health and if using a pump in public bothers her, well too bad. It’s your life!
I’m experiencing a similar thing with my boyfriend. He’s trying to be supportive, but for some reason I feel like a cyborg now. I’ve become more comfortable with testing my blood sugar in public and not hiding out in the bathroom anymore and I want to embrace that, but he feels that the symbols of my diabetes are everywhere now. It’s been a rough go of things. I got the diabetes 2 months after we moved in together, and it’s been an ongoing conversation since then. I don’t think that it can be ignored, I think you just need to talk to your mom about the benefits of pumping, and the freedom that it offers you. How would she like to take needles everyday, multiple times! It’s hard, but hopefully she’ll come around.
That’s just what I do ignore him. the him in this is my husband,He said back 20 years ago when I got one I was doing it for attention. now he just turns up his nose to it b/c he knows I will have a snappy comeback to him.
My associates , friends , medical support system may not have understood ( understand ) what it means having to deal with diabetes 24/7 , however looking back , in their own way they are always supporting me living with diabetes for 27 years and pumping for almost 9 years . I don’t hide from them , what I have to deal with .My pump is on my waistband , if wearing slacks …it is not a matter of bringing " IT " out …it is there !
It is sad you have to work soooo hard making them see the light .Enjoy pumping !!
Your mom is scared. Maybe feels a little guilty for stresses & diet issues growing up, but mostly she’s frightened. Deciding to go on insulin is a huge decision and deciding to pump it is even bigger. People who don’t understand diabetes (almost everyone LOL) think it’s a sign of being close to death or being very sick.
My mom is a LOT like your mom in most everything else, so I can completely relate - I approached pumping with my mom in the sense of what a wonderful thing I was doing for myself so that I could live longer. I went through the site & insulin change process with her, and did it in an excited “proud & relieved” way. Make sure you don’t inadvertently imply that you’re somehow sick enough to be pumping or give any sort of entitlement implications to her with regards to treating diabetes.
I can relate too.Like some people think because I am testing more often now that it is because of the pump.Well it’s not.When I was on injections I probably should have been testing more often than I was.I now take it more seriously and want to stay healthy.Some people don’t understand.
Many acquainteces and co-workers think that because I use a pump, that I am on “death’s door”…sounds like Peggy has called it correctly… Fear…Let her know YOU are not afraid and that you will do everything you can to take care of yourself…And do not expect support from her as long as she is fearful… You just keepo doing what you need to do, and let her carry the “scared about health burden” if that is her choice,
the common assumption from both nurses and lay people (around here) is that I must have terrible control or be (Brittle). They cant seem to understand that while I am t1 and do have some fluctuations I am on pump because it makes my life easier to live and I dont have to worry as much from lows when on the pump because of extended bolus ( i have slow digestion). I cant wait to see how vocal they are when I get my dex. I just ignore them and figure they are ignorant and arent worth arguing with
I had a “friend” who watched me bolus with my pump, looked at me and said… “Your’e not going to have a DIABETIC FIT on me are you”? People just do not understand… I realize that even today diabetics have their feet and legs removed…but 50-60 years ago that was the norm!!! It is not 1950!!! I just had to sit my friend down and explain…calmly… I did not want to have a “fit”…the truth about our disease… Thanks for Listening… Mark
