Funny, I don't really worry about them much. When Eric was first diagnosed, I thought about them a lot and was very sad and frightened, but over time I came to realize that we could just do the best we could and try to keep his BGs and A1cs at the range set by his endocrinologist. So I try not to think about it except to keep watch for signs.
It probably drops into my head maybe once a week, hopefully less, but occasionally more often, but on average would say once a week.
Eyes worry me a bit as I wear glasses and also feet due to being so active. But probably mostly from the numbers of hypo's I've had over my bad years the neurological damage caused by them and the likelihood of that catching up with me one day.
Feelings on it, not sure. Annoyed probably it took so long to actually get things back in my control other than being under the control of D. Anger at being "discharged" way back when and being left to fly blind for so long before getting care again. Determination these days to not let it beat me now I'm back in charge, and now to push myself as far as I can while I can.
I think about complications every time I have a back ache (could that be my liver or kidneys?!???) or every time I get a headache behind the eyes.
I think that I'm in that lucky group of people that has experienced very few complications, and I think that I've avoided talking about them too much here on TuD and on other social media because I don't want to be the guy that talks about something he knows little about.
If you decide to come to Minneapolis, let me know and we’ll organize a big Type 1 meet-up. If you need a place to stay and transportation, I can host you.
I’ve never worried much about complications. After 36 years of Type 1, my eyes, kidneys and heart are seemingly fine. As long as I can take care of myself, I feel confident. I’m terrified of being hospitalized or in a nursing home and relying on others. I’m also worried about the US medical system and what my coverage will be under the Affordable Care Act followed by Medicare.
Thanks!! I think the trip includes lodging, at least from my recollection of the sign up sheet but I'll let you know if I'm gonna go! It's sort of a "using Medtronic product to overcome ____" and some of the products sounded like they might be for things that are hairier than diabetes?
Bravo, Mike.
We all make diabetes seem too easy, so that someone with a heart condition seems like they have overcome more than we have. Your story is very inspiring with your commitment to exercise helping you lose weight and get fabulous diabetes results.
*blushes* Thanks for being so generous!! We'll see if they agree!
If I get picked I'll be very nervous but the Twin Cities Race is the same week as Chicago so I can train with the group I ran with the last two years, which is a big help. I agree that I paint a pretty sunny picture of the whole diabetes thing and am pretty dismissive of the hazards of passing out, etc.
Happy happy anniversary....37 years....wow!
Thanks a lot, Zoe. I am so amazed that anyone would hang in there like he has. So many ups and downs, but he is always right beside me. He is my miracle.
Attitude is everything with diabetes. You had a FANTASTIC grandmother, beechbeard.
I applaud UPBEAT. We cannot spend our days crying or wishing for something else. D is what it is and moving forward is the point.
I know I have specific views on this--even harsh. But after some experience, I have survived whole. I want everyone to be tough, move ahead. be brave and be strong.
I've had diabetes 23 years. I got it when I was 13, no one else had it in the family and we lived 30 minutes from town. I had 1 endo apt/yr. I spent most of my time NOT thinking about what could happen and a great deal of time in my 20's trying to ignore it all together. I only ever heard about kidneys and eyes, or losing a limb. Never did I think or know there were any other kinds of complications, until about 1 1/2 years ago. 1st it was gastroperisis (nerve damage to the stomach) then a couple months later Hypotension (low bp) then last december my left eye showed a lot of retinopathy. This year has been tough, suddenly I couldn't eat much and I get dizzy often. I have had a LOT of time to reflect. I wish I had done this so long ago but.. hindsight.. 20/20. At first, I didn't talk about it with friends on facebook or twitter. I was afraid it would just scare people, I am someones nightmare. There was so much shame and guilt- are people going to judge? Then I decided I'm going to be 100% honest, with the hopes that it might help someone. I don't know if even one person has connected, I do know that I am doing better, mentally at least. I feel like by acknowledging these things are there, I can appreciate what I DO have. I think about the "what-ifs" I think that's normal. Finding the DOC has been huge for me. No judging, no lectures, just support.
1) yes. terrifying,
2) my eyes. because they have given me the most grief.
3) on a nearly moment-to-moment basis, because my vision has been severely impacted by retinopathy. I do try not to think of them. Sometimes, this entails throwing myself into work, other times, it's kicking back and having some drinks with friends. Because you know what??? Having a couple hours where I DON'T think about it is healthy now and then.
4) Mine would be a mix of fear (of going blind) and guilt (that I didn't take better care younger) and determination (to hopefully keep worse complications at bay)
Thanks however I tried loading up on that stuff last summer with mixed results. I tried coffee and it worked ok last year (1x 20 miler and during the Chicago marathon...) but it failed in California. I picked up the vitamin D in a sports injury book so we'll see how that does but I have only just gotten back to running since taking a month off. I'm gonna give 6 miles a spin this evening so we'll see how it goes!
Such wisdom and insight here! I appreciated reading each and every reply. Thanks to al.
I agree, feel the same. Every time I think of it, it devastes me.
No. I don't think I've ever had a dream or a nightmare about diabetes. Not one that I remember anyway.
When I think of complications I think of my eyes first and foremost. I've worn glasses since middle school and I did have an incident about three years ago where I "saw" black blood dripping down inside my eyes. I was in a very stressful job with a psycho boss at the time. When this happened I called the advice nurse and saw the ophthalmologist the next day. Two year's of targeted follow up and the conclusion was DM w/o RETINOPATHY. Whew! I blame stress for what I experienced, not diabetes. Soon after that I wasn't in that job anymore, but that's another story.
I feel grateful for living in the time and place that I do. I have the means (technological, monetary, and mental)to monitor my BG. I can make informed choices. What I don't have is the willpower to consistently adopt more healthful habits. I should loose weight. I should exercise. I should manage my stress level better; not be so Type A. What I feel is frustration. Frustration with myself. Not with the medical establishment for not finding a cure (yet). Not with the food companies who make high carb, high fat food easy to get and cheap. Not with the government for not building walkable towns. Not with diabetes which means my metabolism isn't working as it should.
I guess I try to focus on the things I can do something about and I accept that what we know is what we know.
Complications do enter my head from time to time. But mostly they seem vague and far off. Diabetes makes it hard for me to stay in my body, so to speak. Whenever I feel dizzy or clammy my first thought is my BG level. Am I low? Most likely I'm high. I try to stay conscious of how much better I feel when I eat a low carb diet. I try to smile when my BG is below 150 and not simply take it in as data. In that way I'm creating my own personal positive feedback loop.
Complications is kind of a crap shoot. I know how to improve my odds for a long, healthful life. But there are no guarantees. I accept that. Life is uncertain.
I don't think much about complications, except when I get my semi-annual eye exam, or if my sugars are high for long periods of time. When I do think about them I worry mostly about losing my eye sight. I'm scared of that. I tell myself it's not going to happen, but there have been times when I worried myself into a frenzy, thinking it doesn't matter what I'll do from now on since I probably already did enough permanent damage over the years for this particlaur complication to surface at some point. So when I worry - I really worry! Most of the time though it doesn't cross my mind. For some reason other complications don't scare me as much. I think I just figure that with age everything will slowly start to go anyway, and there isn't much you can do about it apart from what you're already doing.
Great Post ,KATHY. YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION!!!
God bless,
Brunetta