I need to vent. I don’t care if I’m just venting it to the empty internet, I am beyond frustrated.
I didn;t control my diabetes fr months. I ignored it, pretended it wasn;t there. Stuck the jab in, shot some insulin in and that was it. Needless to say I was very sick. But NOW when I am making gargantuan efforts to be healthy, I find my levels screaming up high and then dropping low. My insulin sometimes takes forever to work. I run up and down the stairs countless times, exhausted because my body doesn;t have the energy but it’s better than just falling asleep. Trying to lose weight, going hypo and having to eat anyway. Not knowing what I’m supposed to do?!
STUPID nurses telling me I’m testing too much. They don;t understand! The frenzy you get in when your levels just WON’T GO DOWN.
Why me? Why not me.
So many people have worse things. But this disease is pretty bad as far as they go. It controls so much if you let it. Your energy your learning, your weight, your mood. I’m just so lucky I have wonderful supportive parents and a lovely boyfriend. Without them, I don’t know how I’d go on.
My last host family, were feeding me CAREMELISED carrots at dinner. WHAT?! What’s worse the mother was a nurse. Don’t these people knwo better?!
Is it just the rule that non diabetics are so blind to how hard this is? Even the doctors seem too hard and calous toards me sometimes.
I don’t know I really don’t. We just keep going I guess. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one.
Peace and Love x