While I try to approach my daily life with unending optimism, I am sometimes slapped in the face with a strong dose of realism. So while my general approach to life with the Big D is to take whatever good I can from it and try not to stress about the rest, I too have those rough moments that make me wonder why I got stuck with this.
So here are some snapshots of some of those rougher (yet still comical) moments:
WORK, Part 1
I have been up for hours now – I arrived at the hospital around midnight and was processed and finally admitted around 4:00 a.m. While I sat with an IV in my arm waiting for the CDE to come in at 8 a.m., I was also waiting for the appropriate moment to call the V.P. in charge of subs that day. We have been instructed to call after 5:30 a.m., but I chose to give myself an extra half hour to figure out what to say. At 6 a.m., the call went something like this:
VP: very groggy “hello?”
me: timidly “Hi VP, I am at the hospital, so I wont be in today”
VP: “Well, are you there for you or for somebody else?”
me: “um…me, they diagnosed me with diabetes and they haven’t told me when they will release me”
VP: “Well, I guess if you really can’t come in we will have to figure something out.”
me: sensing her frustration with me… “um…I guess I can try to come in this afternoon if they release me, but I haven’t slept at all.”
VP: “Call back and let me know”
The first and only day I’ve ever had to call in the morning of to say I wouldn’t be in at work. A little more compassion would have been appreciated.
WORK, Part 2
I was running late in the morning and forgot to pack lunch. Knowing I needed to eat something, or I wouldn’t make it through the day, and also knowing I wouldn’t have time to run out of the building to pick anything up, I opted for school lunch. I know it is nutritionally awful. I know that neither of the vegetarian options are going to be ‘betes friendly. But having a hypo episode while teaching because I didn’t eat lunch isn’t very friendly either (this was pre-pump life for me, so I couldn’t just crank down my basal and skip the meal). So, I grabbed the cheese pizza, and a carton of milk, knowing it would be a bigger bolus than most of my meals but not the end of the world, and I headed to the teachers’ lounge. While I’m in there, in comes VP (yes, the same one as above). On her way to the vending machine, she stops, looks at what I have for lunch, and says, “Should you be eating that?” Mind you, she is significantly overweight, is in the midst of a high risk pregnancy, and walks away from the vending machines with a bag of chips, a candy bar, and a soda. My reply, “my doctor is cool with it” and luckily she dropped it just as quickly as it came up, and she was out the door.
WORK, Part 3
At the beginning of each school year, we have the option of filling out a medical information card to be kept with the school nurse. I never used to do it, as I wasn’t on any medication (other than before and after my knee surgery), but I figured that it had become more necessary to keep my information on file. The nurse was already aware of my DX (but to date, I have not needed her assistance in anything D-related) when I brought her a glucagon kit to keep in her office. I keep one with me and my neighboring teachers all know where it is (and hopefully how to use it), but I asked my endo for a 2nd to keep with the nurse, just in case. Now, mind you, it comes in a bright red case that says “Glucagon Emergency Kit for Low Blood Sugar” right on it. I put it in the nurse’s hand, and she says, “Oh, yea…what are you allergic to again?” FACEPALM!
DATING, Part 1
After having hung out with a guy a few times, I casually bring up in conversation that I have the Big D. Quickly explain that it doesn’t really get in the way of much in my life, but thought he should know (at this point I had been a pumper for a bit – so its not like I could hide it forever, and not that I would want to). His response, “So did you used to be fat?”
DATING, Part 2
After having hung out with a guy a few times… (yep, story starts the same, but different guy…ugh that makes me sound like a serial dater).
Response this time, “Oh, my dad’s dog has that. The vet said it’s from eating too much.” Fast forward to him telling me about his ulcerative colitis and all of the side effects that come along with it. Next person that says, “ew gross” when they see my site or see me prick my finger is going to get me retelling his stories – then they will know what gross really is.
EXERCISE, Part 1
I’m at winter kayak practice at the indoor pool. I have most of my gear on and am pretty much ready to hit the pool. Our instructor has introduced himself and talked to us about what he would like us to work on when we get in. When he is done giving instructions, I go over to my equipment, and the last thing I do before getting in my boat is adjust my basal rate. Instructor notices me fiddling with my pump, “you going to listen to an IPOD during practice?” Nope, just dialing down my pancreas.
EXERCISE, Part 2
Unhooked the pump for some “yoga”, and when it was over, checked my BG. Noticing I was high from the extended time off of my pump, I went ahead and programmed in my correction bolus. My partner had to remind me that I might want to reconnect before hitting go. Yep. Facepalm again. At least this one was my bad.
EXERCISE, Part 3
Going on a quick little 3 mile run – choose to stick to more of a main road route than my usual back road routine (I like to save the back road route for my longer runs anyway). Run is too short for me to worry about bringing hydration with me – but I know well enough to always bring a fast-acting snack. So, towards the end of the run when I started to feel the telltale signs of crashing at the end of a workout, I popped a Shot Blok in my mouth. My timing could not have been better. Just as I opened my mouth to force myself to chew through that gooey mess, I was passing a car stopped at a red light with all the windows down. Girl leans out the window and shouts, “You won’t get skinny if you keep eating while you run!” Well, there’s my motivation to keep up with my run schedule this week. Thank you girl who has clearly never participated in a really long race when even the non-Big D folk are usually chomping something every few miles.