Feeling very angry right now

Let me start off by saying that I really feel for everyone that has to deal with diabetes. I really do. I just get soooo frustrated!

I apologize if this is long but I really need to get it off my chest.

After sitting here tonight struggling to get my zonked out almost 5 year old to drink a juice box because he's low, and dealing with our 4th round of this stomach bug and all the crazy highs and lows that went with it (thank you preschool), and being terrified each time my 2.5 year old gets sick that he'll be the next one diagnosed I am just really finding that I have no patience for some older people that are diagnosed with type 2 and want to play the oh woe is me card.
I know that there are some situations where people become type 2 through no fault of their own and these are NOT the people I'm talking about. I am talking about people like the woman I work with. I mean really, you didn't think that being 250-300lbs overweight would affect your health! You thought that eating a full size bag of chips everyday and the giant basket of chocolate on your desk wouldn't catch up with you someday.
Please don't come to my desk and tell me how hard this is for you and how you don't know how you're going to pay your copay for the test strips you now have to get each month ($20) but at least your oral pills are free at the local grocery store. I fork out $800 a month in copays for my son and husband who are both type 1 diagnosed as toddlers. Try having to stick your baby with a needle multiple times a day when he's diagnosed at 2 years old and you're 5 months pregnant with your second little boy. My boys did nothing to deserve this, and no you don't deserve this either, but really with all the media attention that there is for type 2 diabetes there is no excuse for you being "blindsided" by this. Were you living under a rock!!!
Please don't gorge yourself with unhealthy foods and shun exercise like it's the freakin plague and then come whining to me.
Live a day in my shoes lady (or any of the other parents of type 1 kids). See how difficult THAT is. Until then, keep you're mouth shut when you see me.

I'm sorry if this rubbed anyone the wrong way but I just don't have anyone to vent it to in real life that would understand.

You guys are the strongest people in the world and I am honored to be part of the group. Our kids are awesome and so are we!
Thanks everyone!

Hi jakesmom,
I wanted to reply to let you know that you have been heard and we feel your pain. It makes us so vulnerable, when we put our true feelings out there. I think we all feel the way you do. Every time the media includes the word "diabetes" in their headline or plot point, without clarifying which TYPE of diabetes they mean, it does everyone of us in the T1 community a GREAT disservice. Whenever I hear an ignorant comment or remark, I use that as a "teachable moment," and tell them every way that my child's Type 1 diabetes is NOT like the Type 2 THEY have. I hope your coworker will understand that soon and will stop adding more unneeded stress to your life. Lord knows we have enough already. ((hugs)) to you and your son. (btw, our daughter was also dxd at 23 months and is now 6 yrs old.)

Thanks Tonya. I appreciate you responding. I feel better that I got it out there. I know the woman is scared and confused and I don't want to say anything to her to make things more difficult. I figured this was probably the best place to share.... even if a few people decided to flame me for it. I just hope that I have half the strength that Jake has, as long as a do I'll be OK. He's the bravest little man I know. Good luck to you and your daughter as well!

I understand your frustration. I truly don’t think think many people, especially type 2, get what type 1 is all about. They don’t understand it is a whole other ballgame. I try to remind those 2’s that they are lucky to have a pancreas that works and have some control over how bad their diabetes really is…also praying for peace acceptance and understanding. Thinking of you.

Oh, I don't blame you one bit. I don't know how you haven't lost it yet with this woman. I'm sure she thinks you are a sympathetic ear and probably doesn't have a clue how you feel. And there's really no diplomatic way to address her. How do you nicely tell someone their condition is entirely their fault and they wouldn't even need pills and supplies if they lost 200 pounds? Sometimes just venting is exactly what you need.

And we've been through the stomach bug, too, last year. My daughter was diagnosed last February and had the bug in May - it was the 2nd worst week of my life! Had to inject her with Glucagon 2 nights in a row b/c she refused to eat and her BG was dropping at bedtime. I hope Jake gets over it soon!

Our kids are my heroes. Their strength and courage never ceases to amaze and inspire me.

I agree with you totally but never put my feelings in writing! You just did it for me! Hope your little guy starts feeling better today! My daughter was diagnosed less than 2 years ago at age 10, and I always tell my husband that it must be even more difficult when they are still babies. Hang in there, Sister!

You are not alone.

jakesmom - do not apologize for feeling as you do. I think we all have these moments, sometimes more often then we want to let on. I know the first time I picked up my sons supplies from the pharmacy and stood behind a young, 20ish, woman, with tattoos, smelling of smoke, who complained about her $3 co-pays. It was all I could do to not reach out and "touch someone". And I have good insurance and was still in shock when I got my co-pay bill.

My son is not as young as yours, mine is 16, almost 17, but diagnosed this past August. I struggle with the frustrations of it all, as well. I need to get him ready for being away from home for college, and that scares the *hit out of me! But I do realize how fortunate I am that he is the age he is. I can not imagine my sweet baby, being all of 1 or 2 getting this.

Feel free to share the pain and frustration.

Totally understand. My son was dx at 20 months, so I understand exactly how you feel. Those toddler years are so volatile in BGs on a normal day, and add illness and it can be maddening/scary/exhausting!

I will tell you that as they get older, their BGs are a bit less volatile. Illness is still hard, but daily BGs seem to not get the dramatic lows as often. Nothing about this disease is easy though. I don’t think anyone but another parent of a child with T1D can truly understand. Hang in there!

so, I just joined so I can reply to this post.

About a year and half ago, my daughter was diagnosed with T1.. probably the first time in my life where I felt my legs buckle (though I know there are worse thing in this world). I was laid off from my job in 2009, and was working two contracting jobs, and was able to stash away some bucks. Paying your own family health coverage (bad at that) to the tune of 1600 per month, with a 25,000 emergency room deductible. In the end, my medical bills were in the order of 35K, so that second job and all those late nights just went *poof*, but it was worth every penny to get her the care that she needed. However, when I see these morbidly obese people, who then get T2 and are on medicaid or medicare, guess who foots that bill ? And like the original poster states, "what.. you didn't know that eventually your lifestyle wasn't going to bite you in the .....".

Hey Jakesmom,
Trust me. I feel your frustration. It is always hard for me to talk to my family about diabetes because they developed type 2 primarily based on their lifestyle choices. It breaks my heart when I have to discuss with my daughter EVERY FREAKING TIME we leave their house that her diabetes and theirs are vastly different and that she needs to keep doing things the way she is doing them (checking BS regularly, bolusing for that tight glucose control etc...). I also have to point out that I am the only one of the family that has not developed type 2 and I am fairly active (usually, but now I am in RN school so that has gone on the back burner for a while) so that HELPS me from getting it.

You are doing a great job by not unleashing on your coworker. Maybe she could be, in her own way, asking for help with management from someone she knows and trusts. I know I have educated several patients/my family on recommendations about control and encourage them to get active so they will be around for a longer period of time and it can get better but only if THEY chose to make it so. Keep your head up and, please by all means, VENT, VENT, VENT. Prayers for you and yours.

same here.

Hey!! So sorry you are going through this but I understand all to well!

I recently “lost it” in the Dr.'s office last week! A physician told me her husband was a “type 1” but could easily be a " type 2" if he lost 30 pounds!! Really?!?! So i told her she needs to go back to Medical School and that it’s pretty sad that I know more about Diabetes then she does and my son has not even been diagnosed a year.

I do not understand why there is not more awareness about Type 1. My life is a constant worry over my sons health.

I’m glad you opened up!! You just wrote what most of us think and I’m behind you 100%! You are not alone! Wish more people could just see a day in our life!!


Our kids are awesome and have to deal with so much!

Mine is now in college and my fears have changed from BG to what should he get a degree in, will he be able to get a job or will he be discriminated against because of his diabetes and will he be able to get healthcare by the time he is dropped from our policy at 26 ?

I am considering funding a medical trust fund that I can leave to him so he will always have $$ for his care but first, paying for college! Luckily, he was not diagnosed until age 16. With his medical expenses, there would not have been much left to put in a college fund.

I wish you with little ones good luck and hope for a cure or at least advancements in treatment to make it easier.

I am a pediatrician who manages my t1 diabetic, asthmatic, and celiac 12 year old, as well as a busy peds and adult practice. interstingly, since I started blogging about kennedy and learning about diabetes, i have become somewhat of a self proclaimed t2 expert in our shockingly obese community here in western ky. My t2 adult patients occasionally get all crybaby about their disease and obesity and hypertension and back pain, and on and on ( usually a bit of paxil or wellbutrin does wonders) but when I mention oh you know kennedy has to do a, b, c and x, y z then they manage to SNAP RIGHT OUT OF IT! I call it playing the " kennedy card " I try to use it sparingly, but it really does help these folks gain some perspective.

I have a hard time not feeling animosity to type two's also and this is probably the only place i'd admit it...

I try not to feel " superior" to those folks, but it does ■■■■ me off how all the research dollars are flowing there because of the GIANT CRAPLOAD of MONEY to be MADE off t2. EVEN my collegues in endocrine from med school and residency are mostly doing t2 research!!

I am with you.

Do you have dexie yet? We just got one and I can breathe a sign of relief, It is costing out the wazoo, and we are cash pay, but we are wearing for two weeks, and using hartly any strips, so it is practically cost neutral for us!! 150/month dex vs 125/month for strips!

I see what you mean about the trust! Kennedy has been considering endocrinology as a specialty, frankly, she could do the work now, as a 12 year old...

you know our kids DO have a massive healthcare advantage, working in health IT, diabetes tech and innovation , research, I know it's not for everyone, but kennedy is a SHOE IN for admission, due to her disease.

She is also thinking of entering a pageant now, they say you have to have a "platform" so WHY NOT DIABETES????

Our kids should excel in life and in caring for their illness! WHY NOT?

Look at all the fantastic dcom, and dbloggers and dadvocates, and ????

In short, we have to stay POSITIVE!!!

Hi Jakesmom....
first of all let me say that I DO sympathize with your frustration. The frustration of ANY parent of a child with a serious chronic health condition. I am such a parent...though not pertaining to diabetes. I'm also a diabetic...Type 2, but thin (5'6"...122lbs) and inherited from my dad and his mother, (both thin and insulin dependent) amongst other. I have complication...but that's another story. There is Type 1 and Type 2 on both sides of my family. I have done all the right things and STILL, managed to "get" it. So...I am not turning on you...I know where you are coming from, and it burns you to the core. Having a child with diabetes, taking care of LOW lows...HI highs...trying to get a baby or toddler to comply when they refuse to, poking them when they're screaming, is overwhelmingly frightening. That lady has NO CLUE....and never will, lest she gets an education. She may or may not have helped the diabetes along..who knows, but nevertheless...she does not understand. (A mere $20. co pay a month...geez...I wish!!!) There are SO many variants to diabetes, more than "just" Type 1 and 2...and SO many think that they can eat whatever they want, take their oral meds/insulin, and everything will be peachy keen. They are SO wrong. I don't know what to say/suggest other than to either blatantly tell her that she HAS NO IDEA how different it is for your child. Thank God there is a haven here!

Building community is the goal of TuDiabetes. We ask members to respect the differing but equal challenges faced by T1, T2, LADA members & their families. No one, regardless of type, is responsible for causing their own diabetes. Statements that point fingers & lay blame are not in the spirit of support, understanding & mutual respect. Discussions that are divisive & polarizing will be closed.

Please see Our Values http://www.tudiabetes.org/profiles/blogs/the-values-of-tudiabetes.

Thank you.

I have multiple chronic conditions...aside from diabetes...obesity not one of them. Though it is never may aim, to be complaining...I do hurt at time, and frequently one condition or other will tessellate with diabetes, rendering everything very difficult and/or painful. Asthma meds raise my bg, migraines are frequent if I go low. And though I am careful, I go very low at times (1.5). I have severe allergies, and must caution from ingesting certain foods, I do have very high blood pressure, which is controlled with medication....but they occasionally cause cramps that have had me in the hospital. It is not something some of us want to do...complain to our doctors, and YES, there are whiners out there, but I do not for a minute assume that I am worse than anyone else. The fact remains....I have SINCERE pain/flare ups, and my doctor is the ONLY one I can take these concerns to. I pray that my doctor does not consider them minor due to the severity of another patient's condition.