I love that my grandma cares about me, but what the heck? Im looking at this magazine that has a billion and one sweets. Im sitting there saying oh that looks yummy and stuff like that and she says oh you aren’t supposed to have that. I love you grandma, but I can eat that I just need to make sure I bolus correctly sheesh. she has always been like that, I remember when I was probably 12 and I had gone to her kitchen a had a bite sized candy bar. she practically yelled at me to never eat those because I shouldn’t eat them. I guess it’s because that’s how she was raised to treat those with diabetes. Deny them sweets and that will help them with blood sugars. I know we all have those people in our lives.
I was wondering what do you do when someone snatches a treat or a much needed carb out of your hand or makes a comment like that?
Thank God Im pretty fortunate that my immediate family understands and is knowledgeable about our condition. But some far relatives would usually have a frown on their faces too when I eat something they do not agree with. And yes…its quite frustrating and annoying. They dont (and will never dare) snatch anything away from me… maybe because they know I will snatch it back from them harder and firmer. Sometimes i also assess “who” the person is…if its Grandma/pa…I would usually not say anything nor argue with them further…I just beleive that they are just “too set in their ways”. And no amount of explanation can do me correct. For others…I would just simply say…" I already know from my health professionals…what I have to eat, eat moderately and not… But thank you for your concern…" with a smile. It usually works for me. Situations differ though.
I try to say calmly (ha ha) “I can eat whatever you do as long as I put it in my meal plan.” I have an annoying coworker who likes to say ‘are you sure you should be eating that?’ ‘are you allowed to have bread?’ It is hard!
Yep that would be my grandmother too, along with my father, husband, and children. The rest have passed. What do I do when they do that? Ingnore and inform…Every blessed time. You would think after 36 years of diabetes (grandmother and father) 25 years of marriage and 21 years of being mom they would quit but they don’t. One thing this has tought me is patients with airheaded ppl! HA!!
I just had another experience, but this time with a woman at my farewell which was yesterday. I was eating some chips and the woman walks over and says you can’t eat that. I promptly grabbed another few chips and smiled. Her husband has T2, I understand what she was trying to do but at my party? that’s kinda mean.
I don’t eat sugar(haven’t for fifteen years do to an eating disorder) and actually have had the opposite experience. Everyone tells me “Oh you can have just a little” or "it isn’t very sweet. Since my diabetes diagnosis I am happy to say nobody tries to push sugar on me anymore.
We are all different in our food choices, even among Type 1’s or Type 2’s. Not everyone subscribes to the “eat whatever you want and bolus for it” philosophy. I think the important thing is not to assume and not to judge (in life as well as diabetes!)
I’m sure that everyone is trying to do their best when they’re with us diabetic folks. So I’m pretty mild with them.
They can’t possibly know how I’m treating me. BUT, they’ve probably had an experience with someone else.
I’m sure with the numbers of different sorts of bodies we have, and the different expressions of diabetes that there are, we’re each giving different messages to the general public by what we DO. We don’t need to SAY anything at all. LOL
That being said, anyone grab something out of my hand, and I’ll grab it back.
I sometimes post about my frustrations with diabetes on my facebook page and I have this one friend who makes himself my food police. It makes me so mad. I posted the other day about how everyone in my dept got chocolates for Christmas. I got a mug. It made me really sad that day and I posted about it. So this friend and some others start lecturing me about how I can’t have chocolate, how I should just get"sugar-free" chocolates and how I should be grateful for the thoughtfulness of my friend giving me the mug.
There were so many things wrong with their responses - I don’t know where to start.
this is exactly why i’ve never disclosed to anyone in 50 years i’m diabetic. it makes life much easier when only my wife, endo and kids know of my ``afflication.’’ i have a pump so if people looked they could probably figure it out, but i never get asked. been that way from grade school, high school, college, and now work. luckily i’ve never had a problem, ie a seizure or incapacitated by high or low. i have no complications after 50 years so i’m pretty set in my ways. my desire is to avoid police action in all its forms.
I have mixed feelings about my openness. On the one hand, I sort of wish no one knew. Then I could be all like “I’ve got a secret” and I wouldn’t have to worry about food police or people looking down on me or potential job issues. But on the other hand, it’s given me lots of opportunities to educate people - talking to Rotary and various groups as well as individuals. And as a professor, it’s enabled me to connect not only with my students who are also diabetics (interestingly out of a class of 35 I have two type 1s) but students who have other medical issues see to appreciate having someone who understands what it’s like. My biochem students also say they appreciate my talking about it in class. Plus I do get emotional support from friends.
I tend to, if anything, be too open with everyone about my diabetes. Maybe that’s why my experience is the exact opposite of the “diabetes police”. I get lack of understanding and sympathy from some people like “why do you have to eat at a certain time” or being annoyed when I say the pizza place or mexican place won’t work for me or giving me a “15 minute food ETA” for my bolus which was actually 1/2 hour (and this from a nurse!). Another friend whose husband is a diabetic returned to the table from the bathroom and said “Are you two still talking about diabetes?”
I totally understand your “mug experience” feelings, Maria. Me, I’ve had the opposite feelings. Where I used to work we had a fund of $25 for people’s birthdays and the tradition is to get a cake. When my birthday came up my coworker went out and bought me a goddess pendent instead because he knew I didn’t eat sugar. . I was so touched! (and this guy was not known for being a feminist!) I guess I’m more invested in being “special” than worried about being “different”…lol.
My girlfriend was really scared when I got my diagnosis. I took her down with me on a couple of trips to the dietitian. That was the best thing I did so she had a better understanding of the disease and that at times I need carbs It helped her eat more healthy as well. My sister is the food police and I keep telling her that on holiday meals I will work around her but she wont listen. Ughhhh I try to ignore her and I chip away at educating her.
I had similar experiences at my last place of employment. Pot lucks where the worst, because people would always be eying my plate and asking if “I could really have that”. Sometimes people were sweet and tried to bring in ‘sugar free’ things for me, even though I have to take the same amount of Novolog for sugar or sugarless treats as many of them still contain carbohydrates. :-p I never had the heart to mention that.
Good luck with your personal food police person. I actually found a good way to get them to stop - I’d explain it to them. Over and over and over! They likely didn’t get what I was saying, but the threat of another one of my long winded diabetes explanations was enough! Hahaha!
