Just thought I would say HI, Just found this site after getting a diabetic living magazine. I am a mom of Annaliese age 17 D’x at 6. Very tough age she doesnt’ want to take care of herself anymore. Very stressful
It is not easy, but we tie rewards like going out to a movie or with friends to showing responsibility. Blood sugars in range, charts completed.
Hi Penny,
My daughter is only 6, i’m not looking forward to her teen years, her two older sisters are there already. It’s not uncommon for that to happen, from what I hear. I hope you find some useful information to help you both.
Hi and welcome. (My name is Penny too.)
My son was diagnosed at 3 and is 5 now.
and not too rebelious about it yet… I suppose.
The only time he complains or rebels is when it’s time to change his pump site. I’m not looking forward to the teen years. (I have a 17 year old non-D child too.) I hope there is a cure before Riley hits his teens.
When Annaliese was young she was awesome. Never complained did everything herself very early and was just a good diabetic. she never even cried when she got a shot. It’s now that she is just a pistol! Does everything she can to try to out smart (or so she thinks) just like yesterday I told her to download her numbers and there was no checks for yesterday at all…well as we talked (or argued) about it because she claimed she did (trying to blame it on her meter) I finally said look whether your meter is broke or not either Sunday or Monday you did not check and that is the bottom line…soooooooo frustrating. I am so worried about her. It is a constant battle.
Doctors have told us not to use “rewards” like that as we wouldn’t do it for our non diabetic kids. It seems that doctors don’t want you to be mean but yet they don’t offer much help in what to do if they aren’t doing what needs to be done. We try taking things away it helps for the moment.
(((Hugs))) I know that has to be difficult. The problem is that she’s at a wierd age. She’s old enough to make decisions but not old enough to understand the ramifications of her decisions.
I hope you find someone here that can be of help. Also, have you checked out Children with Diabetes. It has a forum for parents that you may find helpful.
I think offering rewards is a great idea. I would do for my non diabetic kids as well. It’s no different than rewarding them for chores or good grades. If it means your daughter will respond and take better care of herself, then by all means do it. It is her life, health at stake.
As bad as it may sound, I believe in showing them the hard consequences if they don’t take care of themselves. My daughter is only 6 and I am already teaching her what can happen if we don’t control her BG. I explain on a daily basis the importance, and have even shown her pictures of what can happen, there is no harm. I have friends who are diabetic and don’t take care of themselves as they should, one is loosing feeling in his feet and soon could lose them, I tell my daughter that, and even have him talk to her about it.
Diabetes is not something anyone can take lightly and I enforce that in my child and ANYONE who comes into contact with her. She is treated like a normal girl and I don’t feel sorry for her, we have past that, we now work on the cause and effect of this condition.
I hope everyone will do the same. I am constantly concerned about the teen years and when she is off to college and I no longer have control, I guess that is why I am compulsive about it now and teach her to be in control of her life at such an early age.
our meter didn’t down load at the dr’s office, but we could manually check what the #"s were.
Hey if it works, it works. I use rewards for my one daughter for grades she likes to shop, so I will reward her with that. nothing else seemed to matter to her. (taking things away)…then she has to use her $ to buy her own clothes, undergarments, socks…that way I don’t spend more $ buing those kind of things for her, she thinks she’s coming out ahead, were i would need to buy those things for her anyway. she’s non d
then for my d child, if she does well with helping with her shoots and checks…once a week she gets an reward…she is only 6…Face it, they are different so why shouldn’t they get treated different, in a good way that is…i’m not saying “out in the real world”
Lotus- i think it is good you show your daughter the reality. However, there may still come a time when she rebels. My child says he does not care, although he knows his birthfather has all the complications, has lost a leg, etc.
Yes my daughter too at a young age met a woman who was going through alot. Had lost an eye had kidney damage, lost a baby and one had health problems etc. She told us that the doctor had told her she had the insides of an 80 year old woman. She said she probably wouldn’t live for more than another 5 years.
With all that said Annaliese has still chosen to ignore the “bad” end of diabetes. She has never had any severe consequences with her diabetes even at diagnosis. We caught it early “by the grace of God” and she has never been back in the hospital due to problems of any kind.
When you have diabetes at such a young age burn out is bound to happen, you just never know to what extent. I know I am a parent with “burn out” and I don’t have the disease and it’s hard because people don’t really understand the stress we have. I just wish that Annaliese would get with the program. Thanks!
I constantly prepare myself for her to rebel. I can only hope that she doesn’t. I just know that I wasn’t taught certain things as a child, that I wish I had been taught just about life in general. So I have learned from that and teach my child as much as I can, knowing that she might not listen, but one could only hope and pray that she does.
I truly believe that at the teen years, it has a lot to do with self esteem, you know, it’s embarrassing to give yourself a shot in front of people, or pull out your pump. But one thing I have learned, is that no matter what you look like, or what disability you may have, or how “normal” you might seem, people will always find a reason to tease you. Unfortunaly having to give yourself shots or pull our your pump makes you an easier target. I strongly feel that if you can get that “I don’t care what you think attitude” things would be easier. If you don’t care that you are teased about something, people will just stop teasing you.
My child has to deal with self esteem issues even at 6 yrs old. It is very difficult to handle, but I have never had a self esteem issue personally, so I just try to show my daughter the attitude I have about myself and hope it will reflect on her.
I understand that We’re the parent, not the one who has to deal with the diabetes. I have talked with Katie l., she is now an adult, but was able to shed some light as to what she went through and felt as a child. check out her blog, maybe she could give you some insite. i enjoy her stories
I don’t know why my reply got deleted, so here goes again, I’m sure it was operator error.
Has Annaliese ever been to diabetes camp? My daughter is only 10, almost 11, and has always enjoyed it. But more importantly in hearing the counselors story’s it seems to have been very instrumental in turning around their behavior and attitudes when they were teens and going through that stage in their lives. We love diabetes camp (we go to family camp) because we’re normal there. Everyone is testing and bolusing or giving shots. They have carb counts on the white board at meal times, the counselors carry glucose and meters, glucogon, and insulin.
You should consider it. Check Children with Diabetes. I believe they have a list of diabetes camps all over the country. And I bet most (ours does) have reduced rates or scholarships or something to help out if you can’t afford it.
Good luck!!
Kathy
I agree that Diabetes camp is good on a deep level, esteem wise, but it has never changed my son’s motivation or actions. He has never come home and changed his ways. I have even said, because he likes sports, to make it a challenge to understand the numbers, and make it a goal to keep the numbers in range.
Remember the doctors aren’t raising the kid or living with the disease. What is the difference of rewarding the positive or taking away a privilege? Whatever you do to motivate/ punish or reward a child for anything can be used for his duties associated with the disease. It is in how you approach it an explain it. If you don’t show responsibility ( for anything—like getting your chores done), then you cannot go out and have fun. One of his responsibilities is all the tasks associated with his disease management: testing at certain intervals, taking certain prescriptions, and documenting the numbers.