My Trial Matters Too

Hello friends, I need some prayer. I am dealing with a recurring sin in my life right now. Jealousy. We are members of a wonderful church that is doing God's will in being adoption focused so many families are adopting. My problem is that sometimes I just get weary of these parents being elevated when no one has a clue how hard it is to have a kid with diabetes. It feels like because my bio kid is the sick one and I did not pick him from an agency, he does not matter and our struggles are not valid. I didn't get to pick my trial, they did.

I'll pray for you, but I don't consider you to have sinned. Perhaps it is because I am jewish. Your feeling are your feelings. I don't think it is a sin to have feelings. To me, it is more important how you choose to act in life. And I see nothing in what you say that suggests you have done anything wrong. It those who have a difficult life and still persevere along a righteous path who I think we need to admire. I'll still pray for you knowing that you do have a difficult journey.

sounds like they are putting themselves as 'more righteous and nearer to god', by adopting a medical or socially disadvantaged child.

the group have made it made in to a competition. I wonder about the welfare of these kids when the novelty wears off

Thank you for you prayers.

I appreciate your perspective.

I disagree, at least from the little information I have.

I do not have reason to believe that the people recognizing and celebrating these adoptions are being anything but sincerely happy and congratulatory. Sunshine, does anyone say anything comparative juxtaposing these family's acts against those that, because of natural children, don't adopt?

Or is the issue simply that you are not being publicly recognized, prayed for, and praised for the burdens you bear incognito, while their newly acquired trials are being given public support in your church family?

I suspect the latter. As such, there are no villains here. The people that are being recognized have done something wonderful. The rest of the fellowship is celebrating it, and supporting them.

Sunshine, I completely understand where you're coming from. It IS unfair. Your burdens with a diabetic child, and your faithfully meeting those burdens successfully, is no less of a good work, nor any less deserving of recognition and support.

Yet, unfair things like this -- forged in the crucible of innocence -- are routine in life. Your church is responding to events that are part of a church program to do good. your struggle is just part of your family living its life.

None of this is to diminish the just praise you deserve for what you do. Rather, to simply understand that there are no baddies here, no one neglecting anyone, just simple innocent ignorance.

The DOC is probably the best place to get some "we understand", and some support. This is the way it will always be, as the public will never, ever, understand what it really means to be a diabetic, or to be responsible for one that can't take care if themselves.

Hi, I can understand how you feel. I don't think that you are being bad and I it is understandable to feel angry, and I suppose jealous, at times. Partly the problem is that the problem you are struggling with is less public and more private. People do not know, nor understand, the difficulties you face. Your family will look like the swan, appearing graceful on the surface but paddling furiously underwater. People know that the other families have adopted and anticipate their difficulties, therefore it is public and thus the sympathy is given. Were people to know your struggles I'm sure the sympathy would be there in equal measure. However, the privacy has its advantages as, in the future, your son will be glad that he had a normal childhood and he will be able to develop properly and not under the magnifying glass of the gaze of other.



Thank you all for your prayers. I prayed during communion a couple of weeks ago for Jesus to make this jealousy from me. I confessed that I was totally unable to do it myself. The next day, a little girl I taught second grade to 20 years ago found me on Facebook! I tutored her a her sister and they were such joys! It was God’s way of reaffirming to me that adoption or not, he
Allows us all to serve each other in powerful ways. I am very fond of the story of Hagar now. As she also first hand knew “the God who sees.” He truly sees our sorrows and is there with us and does not leave us. Thank you again!

Remember if you believe in Jesus... your salvation is by His grace....none of these adoptions or Church activities will bring or deny your salvation...If your a true believer then the Holy Spirit will guide you through your life...He does not guarantee your life will be easy, only that you live by His word ( love Him)...and you will have Salvation....:-)

Thanks John G. That does help.