I’m a newly dx’d T1 who as a professional communicator can find no words to express how I feel. It’s been a little over a month since being told my BG was over 600 with a subsequent A1C of 15+. I can’t come to be angry because there’s no one to be angry at and I can’t come to cry because there’s nothing to really be sad about. That said I’m just stuck at a point of confusion wanting aswers where apparently none exist.
As a former elite distance runner who’s now 38, I’ve seen ups and downs and am no stranger to adversity. The crazy part is I haven’t found the nerve to tell my family and if I hadn’t been admitted to the hospital after finding out, I’m not even sure what I would’ve told my Fiancee. I know I have no reason to be or feel ashamed, but as someone who’s always been seen as the cool, calm, and collected one I’m just haven’t found the words to say, “I’m a T1 Diabetic”.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who finds it difficult to tell family. I am someone who, while not in the best of physical shape, was almost never sick. Once a year, maybe. So I find that I am unwilling to “label” myself as a diabetic. My sister knows, and one other friend, but I haven’t told anyone else. I also don’t want to be viewed differently…
I think (and this is just my opinion) that as you grow more comfortable with your new reality, you will find the words to tell other people who care about you. It will just happen naturally.
Well, NewT1Brotha, you’ve started on your journey to communicate a challenge that now presents itself to you. Yes, you can expect anger directed at nobody in particular and everyone at the same time. It’s the old “Oh why did this disease attack me”? Just what did all the good work I have done to take care of myself mean in the end? Why do I have to suffer and that "obviously out-of-control person over there seems to be free from this “monster?” Those are just a couple of questions you will come up with over the years. Since there are no outright correct answers, we just keep searching and researching. We all do this just because we are creatures that need to know things: the who’s, what’s, when’s, where’s, and how’s. You may not feel ashamed right now and I say …GOOD! Keep that pride but don’t let it keep you from asking and searching. We are all here for you. Although it is mostly not professional answers, we have gone through varying levels of this struggle and can advise you better than a professional at times.
I could go on trying to encourage you, but I think a little bit at a time will be better. Start with pamphlets from the DR’s office or the nurse educator and then graduate to other things like “The Dummies’ Guide to Diabetes.” (A really cool book.)
Get your rest and comfort from those around you and from within. Travel the road at a speed good enough for you to absorb the changes that you are going to have to make in your life.
Nice to meet you! Speechless is a good way to be. People who don’t have diabetes won’t likely even differentiate between T1 or T2 and probably will largely be very clueless about what it means to you or any of the rest of us. You can still be cool, calm and collected though…
T1Brotha,
We share a couple of things. I’m a type 1 diagnosed in my 30s and I’m a professional communicator (I teach now).
I was lucky in as sense…my mom was diagnosed with type 1 in her 30s and I grew up with an awareness and an excellent role model. Still, I hid it from people as much as I could after I was diagnosed. I was mainly worried about job discrimination. At one point I was working as a food journalist and my editor encouraged me to “come out of the diabetic closet” to do a feature on working as a diabetic restaurant reviewer. It was one of the best things I ever did.
It takes some getting used to…but you’re not alone and you’ve joined a great community here.
That’s too bad. It can also be a bit challenging to be calm, cool and collected when your BG is in the 30s. It will likely be then that the people who are clueless will all of a sudden pay attention to you? Any coaching you can do ahead of time will likely help everyone’s level of cool calmness considerably!
Thx for your thoughts. I really don’t feel like I’m embarrassed or ashamed, I think it’s more that I’m not in a position to educate others with questions at this point. I’m doing a lot of research daily and feeling stronger with the information and insight I’m collecting.
Your story definitely helps and I will keep your experience in mind as I continue to get comfortable with poking my own skin.
i was diagnosed a few weeks ago so i sympathize. i’ve found that the best solution is to be very matter-of-fact about it, recognize the limitations it’s put on me, and understand what it doesn’t limit me from doing. the most important thing to do is to avoid being alarmist. it’s not a death sentence and is eminently manageable, especially with current technology. i’d also learn to cook if you don’t know how already.this will vastly expand your flexibility to eat delicious, healthy food, which i’ve found to be really important for keeping my blood sugar down and helping me stay upbeat.
You’ve come to the right place to communicate with others who understand how you are feeling and what you are going through. Take things one day at a time. As you learn more about diabetes and how to care for yourself, you may find that you are more comfortable with the thought of telling others. If you have questions (about anything) just ask - SOMEONE here is bound to be able to help
There is nothing to be ashamed about and there is no reason why you should not tell the family. However it is vital that you do tell them! They need to know and then they can help you with diet changes, what to look out for when you are going high or low and will, when it is explained to them know the importance of a good diet and at the right times!
I am sorry that you are struggling. I should think for most people it is a bit of a shock, but for me it was a relief to know why I had been feeling so ill for the previous ten years and had lost a shocking amount of weight - 2/3 of my body weight and people thought I had either got cancer, was on drugs or was anorexic or bulimic!
Try to think it out. Tell the family that you had been poorly for a while but could not put a finger on it. Tell them that you were checked out (you do not have to say that you were in hospital) and it was discovered that you were diabetic. Tell them that there are various changes in your life and diet that are necessary. Write a letter if it would help more. Tell them that at the moment you are in the early stages and that things might go wrong until you have established what is going to work with you! And that what works now might not work later on. Tell them it is not a death sentence any more and that there are many things you can do and that they can do to help you. It is not always hereditary. Sometimes it can come on quite suddenly due to a virus, or for no reason and that they should not panic.
I wish you well and if you need to talk, then talk to us! We have all been there at some point in our lives. I had it for 10 years (all the symptoms) but was only diagnosed just under 7 years ago!
Welcome to Tudiabetes. Sorry about having to join Club 1. Yea, it’s weird at first. I’ve sort gotten use to it. Like you mine came out of nowhere. My bs was 672 at dx. And just to show how open Club 1 is I joined at 52, 21/2 years ago. I didn’t have much choice on the family as I was staying at my parents at the time and I wound up in ICU.
It has been more than five years since I was diagnosed and I am still coming to terms with having diabetes. I still harbor anger. Yes anger, not just at being struck with a chronic disease, but at things that have happened along my journey. I felt kinda like I had died after being diagnosed and in truth, I had to leave my previous life behind. In retrospect, I went through the five stages of grief outlined by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross; D’Nial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. I’m still not really done with all the stages and I may never be done.
And please understand, it can be difficult coming to terms with having diabetes. Not everyone wants to disclose that they have diabetes. Elizabeth Hughes Gosset, one of the first people to recieve insulin, daughter of the then secretary of state and eventually famous for starting the Supreme Court Historical Library, hid her diabetes (Breakthrough). When she died at the age of 73, few of her friends or associates knew of her diabetic condition, she systematically destroyed most of the material documenting her treatments, and had expunged all references to diabetes from her father’s papers (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elizabeth_Hughes_Gossett). It is understandable that you may not wish to disclose your diabetes, I think we all struggle with wanting to be identified as a person by who we are, not by our diabetes. In my case, I’ve personally not been entirely forthcoming with my brother who was diagnosed with diabetes two years ago. I started insulin in December, and don’t wish to disrupt his life right now with that information and start him with worries that his diabetes will run the same course as mine.
Please feel that you have every right to feel anger, to mourn and to grieve what has happened. But also realize that in the scope of things, you still have every opportunity to live a full, happy and healthy life. You will figure things out, but with everything that has happened, you may find it helpful to just sit and tell youself “Everything is going to be ok.”
