What a month! The month of March was very important to me because it marked ten years since diabetes had moved its unwanted self into our lives. I faced it with mixed emotions. My heart broke for the innocence that was lost but we celebrated good health and the amazing friendships that we had found because of diabetes. I made a conscious choice to begin to focus on the positives. Diabetes was here to stay so no sense crying over spilled milk. It was time to rejoice over the wonderful people that had been brought into our lives.
We had made friends with families from all over the world. We had connected and that was the best part of life with diabetes. The worst part also reared its head in March. For every parent who has a child living with diabetes, their worst fear is to have their child lose their life to this disease. A parent is never to outlive their child and in the past month it has happened to far too many parents. I am not sure why this has happened. Is it a product of technology that we are learning more about these deaths? Is it a product of the fact that we have become such a close knit community? No matter what the reason, we had heard of four death of children under the age of 21 who had either succumbed to a low at night or who ran into trouble with highs and slipped away from their families. There is no greater loss. There are no words.
These deaths cut me to the core. I was heartbroken to know that children, in some cases very close to my own child's age, and in two cases diagnosed at the same time as my child, had their lives cut short. I began to wonder about my own focus. I have always worked very hard to make life better for those living with diabetes now. As much as I would love a cure, I have never been able to see it happening in my lifetime. I felt it was better for me to focus on keeping those who have the disease healthy and in the best shape that I could. I felt that if a cure was found that they would then be able to move forward with only memories of life with diabetes and not carry forward the complications. These deaths made me wonder if my focus was wrong. Could it be that a cure was the most important thing of all? Could it be that I should be focusing on fundraising and getting people to really dig deep to help with this? I was truly at a loss. I did not know which way was right...until Monday.
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