Perfection? i think not

Today I went to the endo. The person I usually see, Kelly, is gone now so I saw another lady. She made me want Kelly back.

This lady (forgot her name) started out pretty nice, saying things like “I think you should start measuring your food” to thing more offensive like “If you would take this seriously, you could have perfect blood sugars!” (she meant never too high and never too low. ever.) She went on a whole rant about measuring food and how I could be “the perfect diabetic.” She proceeded to tell me about Tammy, another lady that used to work at the office, who measures EVERYTHING and who’s A1C is in the 5s. But theres a HUGE difference between Tammy and I. She’s an adult. I’m a teenager. I have more hormones bouncing around and messing up my blood sugars than she does. Of course my A1Cs gonna be higher.

Why on earth did she plant this idea of perfection in my moms head? My mom actually believes it! If even a “normal” person isn’t perfect, how can I be? A “normal” person has the potential to go low by skipping a meal or vigerous exercise.

So basically, I now have impossible expectations to live up to. Honestly, it makes me want to give up, because I know I’ll never meet this expectation and I’m not having any progress with convincing my mother that theres no way that I’m never having a bad blood sugar day


I am sorry to here this. People without diabetes even those that care for us can sometimes believe that it is so simple to be diabetic and that if we would just do this or just do that it would all be perfect. It is going to take time for your mom to come to the understanding that this is going to be an everyday battle and no matter how hard you try sometimes you will still lose out. I am surprised a endo office seems to believe a type 1 could have perfect A1C’s all the time much less a teen. you are just going to have to remember this is your disease and you do everything you can to keep it under control and when that “bad” number pops up just tell yourself you can’t win them all and go on taking care of you.

Maybe you should have your mom take a look at the site and see how perfection is a pipe dream and we do the best we can. My internist was shocked when I told her that I will have a low once a day or so. When she raised her eyebrow at me I shut her right down. Dr. Perfect Pancreas has no idea how tricky it can be to get this chemistry right. Especially when you are growing, subject to hormonal changes, and have varying degrees of physical activity. You can be the perfect diabetic if that’s all you do and never leave the house. Frankly, we don’t all have the same reactions to food and exercise. Weighing and measuring is good when you are learning to carb count. But you do get to the point when you can look at an apple and figure it’s about 28 grams and not be far off the mark. But you have to realistic about that from the standpoint of being in school, out and about, etc. We have enough to carry around as required equipment; a portable scale is where I draw the line.

Arrrgh! Man, is that aggravating, not to mention false. Please ask your mom to check out discussions here to see how we all struggle & how far from perfect we are, despite best efforts. If only it was as easy as measuring food.

On your next visit, tell this woman how you feel about her philosophy of perfection & how unmotivating it is.

Set your own goals & don’t allow one person’s unrealistic expectations dampen your spirit. Hugs, sweeite. Keep your head high. We all think you’re perfect just as you are.

Honey, Sweetie, put your Mom on here,oh boy… I was a teen Type 1, and am now a Old Lady of 54 with it still. Back then if I had tried that, I am human, I will have highs and Lows, its natural for us to have this. It is a shame that a Dr has to build up a lieing story to you and your Mom about perfection. Come on Diabetes is a Disease, even when we do all we can do to try and keep our numbers good, it drops and goes high too. We can’t help it.
I guess its going to hard, since your Mom doesn’t understand Type 1 as it would help her understand the reality of it.
My Mom didn’t care one bit, she told me it was Mine, and for me to deal with it. She wasn’t going to do a thing to help me. That was hard too.

So eat healthy and do what you can, its all you can do:) Hugs Debbie

Oh i hate when doctors expect perfection when they themselved don’t have it. My teen years were up and down more than i would of liked. Measuring does not equal perfect numbers for all. I know i have tried and i still have crazy drops. I would talk to the doctor next time you go in. Explain how you are doing the best you can. There is always so many things that can affect blood sugars not just measuring the food properly.

Hey guys! Thanks for all the comments/support! I’m thinking maybe I need to show my mom a few comments? Just to prove that I’m not the only diabetic that says perfection is impossible, especially in a teenager…

It is false statements like this that make everyone in the diabetic community suffer. My guess is that “Tammy’s” pancreas is still working a bit. Everyone’s diabetes progresses at a individual pace. I too had “great” blood sugars for an extended period of time…I now understand that my pancreas although “mostly” dead was still functioning a tiny bit, just enough. Now that my pancreas is “all” dead, I am having the dreadful problems many T1 have from day one. Tell your mom there is no way that I am “taking” worse care of myself than I once was that is dumb!! PEOPLE ARE ALL JUST DIFFERENT. NOT BETTER NOT WORSE. NOT RIGHT NOT WRONG… Repeat after me JUST DIFFERENT !!!

I’m sorry to hear you went through this. As a parent of a diabetic I can kinda see where your mom is coming from. She probably doesn’t want to see you struggle with blood sugar and maybe thinks it all in your control, when in reality, it isn’t. Just the 3 years of dealing with Chloe’s diabetes, she will have a good few months and then all of a sudden, she’s all over the place again. It’s frustrating but part of the disease and I’m surprised your doctor doesn’t see this. I hope your mom relaxes a bit, it’s hard sometimes though, she just wants to do whats best for you. :slight_smile:

Thanks, Lori :slight_smile: