Difficult to race through this life as a person with T-1 w/o getting caught up in the pursuit of perfection. Every day, 10 to 12 times per day, I am scored on my ability to control T-1. Every 4 to 6 months, I get blood drawn and discover what my new HbA1 number is this time. Every 90 days I see my endo for an update at my skill as a practicing T-1. With all of these checks and balances, I could easily become focused on perfection instead of focusing on a life well lived. What’s a T-1 gal to do?
From 1980, when I recieved my first blood sugar machine, until about 10 years ago, I kept detailed logs of my bs and insulin demands and activities. Books and books of numbers that taught me how to live in the real world and still enjoy food, friends and fun. But my HbA1c left a lot to be desired. So I stopped! I didn’t stop checking my bs or bolusing, I stopped obsessing with perfection. I started to,enjoy my life in between taking care of the Big D and focusing on the little moments w/o worrying if I was being a “good” or “bad” peep with T-1.
A very cool thing happened. My HbA1c numbers came down, my health improved and I was able to experience more time in between the times I address T-1 responsibilites. I started to take trips by myself, on my motorcycle, in a car, walking, train travel in Europe . All kinds of adventures that allowed my new attitude towards inperfection to blossom. Nature is not perfect why should I be the exception?
Over the past 49 years, the medical biz has put a lot of pressure on this peep with T-1 to be perfect. They are wrong. No one is perfect, nothing is perfect and there is beauty in inperfection. So, try to stop beating yourself up when your numbers stink and just do the best you can. Be true to yourself and not to the impossible ideal laid before you by people who do not have to live like a T-1 or T-2.
Good luck my friends
Great post! I couldn’t agree more. I think I was a lot more of a “control freak” before diabetes arrived to show me the that certain things are uncontrollable. I tend to let other goals pull my diabetes management along rather than pushing myself to control, control, control. Just finished my 3rd half marathon this morning…started w/ a BG of 289 due to the race day adrenaline surge and rebound from overnight low. In a perfect world I would not have run since that BG was “over the medically recomended limit”. But I embraced the imperfection, bolused 1/2 a unit, cancelled my reduced temporary basal, finished in record time for me, and ended the race with a 135 blood sugar. I give glory to God for that because it was impossible to really even guess how to handle that. Yes, there is beauty in imperfection!
Cheers to the beauty of imperfection!
Boy that made me stop! And think! I am not at all perefect, whay do I give my Diabetes such heck when my numbers aren’t what I expect…gosh I am hard on me, stress and worry about it… Gosh I will have to stop and wack me when I do this. I mean really 39 yrs of this and where has worry got me, NOWHERE good…Thank you:)
So, I am laying in bed this morning thinking about life and it dawned on me that I had imperfectly spelled imperfection incorrectly as “inperfection.” Perhaps I am trying to tell myself something eh? LMAO
Love the comments!
Log book? Ugh too much like school home work. I’ve not kept a log book since I was a child living at home back in the 70’s. I just do what I have to do keeping myself in line with my diabetes and not obsessing about my numbers to the point that diabetes is ruling my life, it’s my partner in life, we work well together most of the time.
Here, here on your statement - " No one is perfect, nothing is perfect and there is beauty in imperfection"!
Jackie, I agree! I had to find this out all on my own. Too bad they don’t teach this in the diabetes courses we are offered during our “sweet” careers. Attitude is everything and I believe there has to be a good balance. Obsessions are fatal.
Thank you, this is just what I needed to read! As a recently diagnosed type 1 diabetic, I am struggling with the idea of perfection and diabetes ruling my existence. As someone who is independent and also loves to travel, as someone who specializes in preparing gourmet desserts, as someone who has high dreams and hopes for myself, it has been difficult to picture myself doing this for THE REST OF MY LIFE. But I know I can, especially when I read posts such as yours.
I love love your blog. You are starting today with another way to take care of your health. You have such a great team in your corner and we will always have your back, with laughter and tears, and that is OK. forever your mom
You rock! Great Blog. It's so hard because there are so many people out there who haven't a clue who are constantly telling you it's your fault and you need to do better. Then they throw at you all the complications if you don't. The usual scare tactic. I just want to yell at them sometimes, scream to them that I KNOW the complications. They are in my head constantly and I don't need the reminders. I know what this disease can do to me. Thanks for the wonderful blog.