So, today was my 6 month endo appt. No big deal, right? Well today while talking to her, I was overwhelmed by so many emotions. Pride. Joy. Luck. Amazement. And guilt. Why guilt? Ill get to that.
I dont really blog much, but wanted to share this with my TuD fam.
Endo (after looking at my blood work): Well, your cholesterol is about 25 points too high, and you could probably stand to lose about 15 pounds.
Me (after all these things hit me): Uh, really? Thats it?
Endo: Were you expecting something else?
Me: You know what doc? Ive had type 1 for 48 years now (this is my diaversary, give or take a few weeks). And after 48 years all you have to tell me is my cholesterol and weight are a little too high?
Endo: Well, yes. Your A1C is good, your fasting BG is good, calcium is good, kidney function is at 100%, and Im not seeing any other issues.
Me: Thats friggin' AMAZING! FORTY EIGHT YEARS with NO complications!
Endo: Well, yes, it is.
And we spent about 20 minutes talking about my almost half a century with D.
We talked about about how I didnt even take my first home blood glucose test until I was 19 when they first came out. We talked about how I still remember as a child boiling my glass and stainless syringes, and having to manually sharpen the needles. We talked about test tape and pee tests, and now, how funny it is they even used those for recording control.
I told her about the times as a teen when I didnt give a second thought about walking up to the neighborhood Safeway and buying a pound of Kraft caramel, and eating it all within 24 hours. And not bolusing for it.
I told her about the 3 times I woke up with an EMT in my face after losing 3-6 hours because of a severe low, and twice in the hospital.
We talked about how funny it is (now) that NPH and Regular on a sliding scale was the treatment of choice back then.
I told her how excited I was was Humalog first came out, and what a miracle it was. Lantus, also.
It really is truly amazing what Ive been through, and how Ive escaped complications. Here's where the guilt comes in.
I really dont micro-manage my diabetes. I mean, sure, I watch my diet, test 8-10 times a day, etc. But if I have a fasting BG of say, 225, I shrug it off, correct, and move on. And to anyone reading this, I honestly believe THAT is the key to a happy life with D. Do the best you can, and move on. Dont fret about what MIGHT happen, just deal with IS happening, and move on.
Its always been my belief a successful life with D involves 3 things: good care, luck, and good genes. I have been incredibly blessed to have all 3. Not everyone does. And yes, sometimes I feel guilty about that.
So, in closing, its really been an incredible emotional high for me today. The incredible life of D Ive had. Ive been through SOOOOO much. And even though Ive been though so much, there are always people who have been though more. Two members here, shoshana and richard157, are examples. They too have so lucky. I am proud to stand with them in the long-timers club, and hope to be here for another 40 years.
To those who are newly diagnosed and scared, take my word for this. YOU CAN DO IT! You have so much technology at your fingertips, and with a community like TuD alongside you, you can have a healthy, happy, D life.
Like I have been lucky to experience.