This is getting harder

It’s getting tough with this kid . I know she is struggling but this isn’t easy on any of us. Every meal Is a battle. She is taking advantage of our worring about her and is just starting to lay around not helping with chores and slacking in her school work. If I try to talk to her about it I just feel like a jerk that should let her be. But I do worry about her and want her to make the right choices. I know it’s her diabetes but it’s hard to accept

How old is she? Maybe talking to other kids her age with diabetes? Maybe nutrition specialist? Kind of age dependent for ideas. Best wishes, it is not easy on any of us.

I am not the father of a T1 teen but I have seen this discussed before, I always admire the parents that continue to treat their teens the same as before, Sure you treat his or her diabetes but continue to have the same expectations as before. T1 places very few limitations on what is possible, if you would not allow such behavior before diabetes I suggest you not allow it now.

T1 places very few restrictions on what a person can do in life, the trick is to help her to realize it. .

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Make sure both parents are in agreement. Kids will look for any crack. Whether you agree what the other parent says in relation to the situation of not - you have to back them up 100%. Discuss differences of opinion later and well out of ear range.

Pick your battles. You can’t win them all so don’t try. Only fight the ones which are the most important.

Don’t make any threats under any circumstance. Don’t try scare tactics. These all backfire and ultimately sow discord and cause harm.

This is a waiting game. These teenage years don’t last. Might seem like forever but really - 2 or 3 years and you will be out of this.

My opinions. Every family is different. Teenagers respond in very different ways. Play the Long Game.

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Lack of discipline and boundaries makes kids unhappy. Relaxing things because of a diagnosis of D might be confusing to a kid, make them think that D is worse than it actually is.
When I was diagnosed, my parents were not devastated, depressed ot guilty, and my discipline continued much as it had before diagnosis, however, at school I was treated more carefully by the teachers, and got out of sport and so on, which was very confusing to me initially, then I just made the most of it (hated sport ++++). My parents sorted that out rather too quickly…