24 Hours

24 hours…I just want 24 hours to be normal. 24 hours with no insulin shots…no blood sugar checks…no Highs…no Lows. No feeling tired…no feeling worn out…no feeling stressed about what my next blood sugar is going to be…no worrying what my next A1c is going to be…no worrying about what my next eye exam will reveal…no worrying about what my next kidney function will show.

24 hours…Just 24 hours to be a normal person. 24 hours to be able to enjoy life. 24 hours to be me again…24 hours where I don’t feel like this disease is robbing my life of so many important things.

God, is 24 hours too much to ask for??? I just want 24 hours…

I was thinking about that today. It’s a 24 hour/7day a week job. No vacation, no time off, nothing. It’s just life.

I’m pretty sure it’s normal to get overwhelmed at times with having to live with diabetes. It’s not a consequence of anything we’ve done, not a punishment, it’s just our “luck.” The nice thing is that we’re not alone. Maybe we’re not “normal,” we DO have more to pay attention to, more responsibility, more challenges, more odds against us, more to handle…but all of what we go through is normal in the life of you, me, and every other T1. That doesn’t make it suck any less…but it certainly helps me to feel a little bit better that I’m not the only one with the suckiness. :slight_smile:

And it’s not gonna happen!

Blunt words, but there is a silver lining there all the same. It is still possible to live our lives with a measure of fulfilment, as long as we work with the limitations and restrictions that diabetes imposes on us. It’s all a question of knowing what’s important to you in life and what you’d like to do and achieve. Diabetes simply means that we have to be a little more realistic and prepared. The fact that we’re faced with limitations is a kind of silver lining in a way. Most people aren’t faced with the kind of limitations that we are until they reach older age. That means we have accrued so many decades of prior experience to help us deal with our bodies and their limitations and that as we get older ourselves we can hopefully take a more measured view of health issues and not feel too keenly that our world is falling apart.

I’d take even 4-5 hours normal… enough that I could just eat a meal, make it through my run and not have to worry did I eat enough, is there enough insulin, is this run going to make me go high or am I going to drop? did I pack everything that I need just to step outside of my house? I feel so paranoid that I’m going to forget something and that it’s going to be the mistake that costs me big time

But I think that we get to make the choice to have all the important things, regardless of the disease. I don’t know what your important things are, but I know that I"m not going to let diabetes win mine. It’s not going to take away my relationship with my husband, it’s not going to take away the kids I want to have. I am going to run my half marathon, I am going to keep the job that I love.

It sucks, that’s for sure. There’s no way around it, and no way to make it into a positive, because diabetes will always be a negative, but you don’t have to let it win. And won’t those important things mean that much more when you know that you did it all and in spite of having diabetes?? I"m sorry you’re hitting a rough spot where it seems like this is an all consuming thing… and if you find a way to get those 24 hours let me in on it!!

“One more day
One more time
One more sunset, maybe Id be satisfied
But then again
I know what it would do
Leave me wishing still, for one more day with you”

Corny, I know- but it’s what I thought of while reading your post- that sweet, yet kinda lame song by Diamond Rio.

T1D is hard. Just yesterday I cried myself to sleep because the morning before I woke up at 48, but didn’t have the wherewithall to get out of bed and drink something. Scary. I’ve experienced insulin shock comas so many times, but it’s been three years, that I’m terrified of going back there.

T1D is just something that you “deal with”. It gets a little bit easier, and a little bit harder, sometimes… but mostly it really is just annoying.

But, I’m with ya, Ryan. Me too.


Goo luck with your marathon!!

Oh I know Ryan! It gets so frustrating. Some days I just feel like giving up. But I know that I can’t do that. I know that there are too many consequences that I would have to face. I just have to keep going and live day by day. Somehow.
Just know that when you are having those hard times, you can turn to TuD
Hang in there Ryan!

Thanks Christina

I think that so many of us feel the same… if we don’t, we are probably in big-time denial and will end up suffering the consequences. I think that your attention to your health will pay off for you. Being a conscientious diabetic is stressful; however, having to suffer bad complications is stressful, too. I’m choosing the 24/7 stress right now to avoid the complications later on, if I possibly can.

Hang in there!