Beautiful Disaster

Life is way too much to handle sometimes. All my friends are still fighting, Elizabeth still wont talk to me, I just found out that one of my friends lost her house so her and her family are comming to live with us for a while and to top it all off yesterday morning I found out my grandpa has cancer. They did surgery on him yesterday and it has all his organs except his liver and 2 of his arteries.
He’s actually not my biological grandpa. My grandma and him didnt get married until I was 8. So for that whole part of my life I knew I was missing something. As a kid, all I wanted was a grandpa. When my grandma married grandpa, I was excited. I latched on. The other grandkids werent as happy. After that, I was pretty much his favorite grandkid. So this is harder on me than on my brother. My cousins dont even know yet. We’ve decided to keep them in the dark for a while because most of them are pretty young. If we do tell the other older one, Will, then all the little ones will find out from him.
So since my friend Cora and her family are comming today and my room isnt completely clean yet (which i did spend time cleaning it yesterday so its not that bad) my mom is making me stay at home and clean while she gets to go see grandpa. Thats not fair, because Im the one he actually wants to see. I know because last night when everyone was saying bye, he stopped me and asked me where I was going. He didnt do that to anyone else.
On the bright side, my friend Mariah lost her grandpa because of cancer, so she knows exactly how I feel and what to say to make me feel better. So everytime something happens, its my first instinct to text her. Whats better is she lives right down the road from me, so if I needed her that bad she can just drive up.
My life feels like a beautiful disaster…

I’m sorry, brandi, to hear this bad news. Send him some cards, or a letter, and tell him how special he is to you. I lost my grandmother many years ago, but I still think about her all the time, and how she treated me and inspired me to do well in school and college. I was just looking at some letters from her the other day.