Cannot handle highs with CGM. Ever want to go all Christian Bale on diabetes?

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In my last post, I talked about my frustrating morning. Then I thought things were better after lunch, then just to spite me, I go back up again. Not super high. It’s been hanging out at 150 all afternoon. Not incredibly high, but higher than I want. And it’s making me take too much insulin to cover it. If I wasn’t taking all the extra manual boluses, I’m sure I’d be in the 300s by now, the way this day is going.

I’ve already surpassed the total amount of insulin I took yesterday. And it’s not even 6PM yet. I haven’t eaten dinner.

I’M LIVID. Just angry as anything. I want to go off like Christian Bale, only at a physical representation of diabetes. Ha.

I think part of my problem is that I absolutely cannot handle highs with the CGM. I become obsessed. Seeing a high number constantly for hours on end throws me off the deep end. Especially when the trend starts rising MORE an hour after I do a correction bolus.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

You could tell me to just ignore it. But I can’t. It’s driving me crazy.

I’m too obsessed over it. And it’s just a 150. It seems stupid to be this bent out of shape over it; it’s not like I haven’t had my fair share of 300+s. But this sure is a persistent little ■■■■ 150.

The only good thing about my diabetes today is that my CGM has been within 5 points of my meter at just about every check. And I’m pretty sure I’ve checked my BS with my meter at least 15 times today.

Sometimes I think I’m too mental to have a CGM. But now I would go even more insane without it. I’m completely dependent on it. I HAVE to know what my BS is all the time. (Seriously, I get really anxious/panicky when I start a new sensor and don’t have readings for just 2 hours.)

It’s amusing what a change this is to how I was last summer when I would check my BS with my meter once a day and not give a ■■■■ what it said.

What is wrong with me.

Venting helped. And watching the Christian Bale video. Hot crap, that amuses me.

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hahaha christian bale… too hilarious, you sound like a tape recorder of myself when i get on my high bs rants and want some magic insulin powers to explode from my pancreas. perhaps your body is fighting some kind of infection or coming down with something, usually when i get those days where my blood sugar is stuck moderately high all day no matter what i do i FREAK OUT :stuck_out_tongue: but it usually turns out to be pms or something odd like that; i’m sure tomorrow will be better :slight_smile:

hale to christian bale that snazzy young snazzilicious man, i would like to see how he would handle high blood sugar if he was dia-beautiful like us