Emotional, physical, nutritional planning help needed stat

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I just have to break down and ask for help. I have been extremely depressed lately and, despite trying to help others out of the gloomies, cannot seem to get myself out of the muck and mire. Just yesterday, my DR yelled at me for lacking commitment to losing weight and keeping the diabetes under control. He said I don’t want to cooperate with the local Metabolic Clinic with what they want me to do. They want me to (1) journal what I eat; (2) eat no less than 3 meals a day; (3) do the “Sit and Be Fit” program on TV.

I NEED SOME VERY PESONALIZED HELP!!!I Despite my trying to help others by scaring them about what could happen to them with complications that I have incurred, I can’t seem to help myself. Pretty hypocritical of myself, huh?

I hate cooking! It is boring for one and also it is painful for me. If it can’t be put into the micowave, I really don’t want to do it! I don’t think that anybody can help me with that because I don’t have the funds to keep that stuff in the freezer.

I hate planning meals. Mostly because I don’t have a whole lot of the extra stuff that makes planning easy. I’m mostly the kind of person who goes to the fridge, opens it and stares in to see what is available for a meal. I also run out of ideas on what to do. I may be creative in some ways, but not this.

I hate writing down meals, carbs and when I eat. Maybe I could convert to the computer since I type faster than I think and my hands won’t get too tired!!

It’s not that I hate exercise, it’s that it is very painful… I have a number of physical disabilities that make it extremely to get any sort of meaningful exercise. Arthritis has set in on one knee and it is making me miserable; I have a grade 4 spondylolisthesis and that has made me miserable for 30 years; I have little or no feeling in my lower legs and no feeling in my feet which causes me to not have any balance. I fall very easily. So, you see, exercise is not a pleasant experience for me. (I sure wish I had an exercise program and a buddy to do it with!)

What I see through the depression is that, if I don’t get outside help, I’m not going to do it myself. And who better to get help from than the people who are going through it!! Not that the professionals don’t know, but they don’t KNOW!!!

Please, help me…somehow.

Lois La Rose
Milwaukee, WI

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Thanks so much for taking so much time. I will wait to print this out because I am sure I’m going to have lots and lots to print out.

Love,
Lois

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Hi Lois, I think it is easy to feel overwhelmed by the thought of doing all these things. But in the long run, it will be worth it. My philosophy is to try to do better but not worry about being perfect.

I also hate cooking and meal planning. I’ve tried to inspire/motivate myself to meal plan. I’ve signed up for services that sent me weekly shopping lists and menus. But it would end up that I didn’t want to eat what they were telling me to.

Now I have a different approach. I don’t try to do a real meal plan. My current system is basically to eat the same dinner every night but with variations. Basically we have a big salad and a protein (meat or seafood). For the salads I just buy big containers and baby spring mix and baby spinach every week. Proteins I might marinate and then bake or broil. Or find a fairly simple recipe (my fave recipe site is allrecipes.com). This system has made things much easier for me. I hope you can figure out what a good system for you might be. What kinds of food do you like to eat?

I think Amarilis had a lot of good suggestions. Could you cook up a batch of chicken breasts or whatever to have for the week? it’s probably the about the same amt of work to cook 1 or 6. Also eggs are easy and can be cooked in the microwave (be sure to stir well first so you don’t end up with an explosion, i speak from experience). Also stuff like canned tuna/chicken don’t require too much prep.

As for keeping a food journal, we always hear that it’s a great tool. I would just track breakfast and then sort of forget about the rest of the day. But last week I made myself track a couple complete days and it was an eye-opener. I saw that I was eating way too much, sigh. There are lots of free online food tracker sites that will keep track of calories, protein, carbs, etc. but not sure if they have the kind of format you need. There are also programs you can buy for your computer. It can be helpful to see what kind of nutrition you are getting or not getting. Also it can help you keep up with your goals. I personally have been using gyminee.com b/c the interface works well on my iPhone but it’s not quite what I want.

Exercise is vitally important and I think not only helps physically but mentally as well. The human body is really quite amazing and can do so much. But you have to use it. Maybe you could just work on being consistent rather than focusing on how much. Like just try to exercise 4 times a week, even if only for a few minutes at a time. Try to build the habit at first. Do you like the Sit and Be Fit program?

You can do whatever you set your mind to. :slight_smile:

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HE GUYS AND GALS:

Please don’t stop. I need help and I need it structured and fast. I’m going under for the last time, I think, and I don’t want to stay down!!!

Lois

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Would it help for you to be accountable to us? Like maybe you could use the blog function here to post your food journal/meal plan/exercise?

What kind of food do you like? Maybe we could help you find recipes.

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Sweeter:

How did you get your moniker? Funny story behind it?

I’m going to go to your page to respond to this for confidentiality reasons.

Lois

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It’s actually the name of one of my daughter’s Webkinz pets. She thinks of funny names sometimes (she’s 4yo). I thought it was a cute name for diabetes sites.

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Cute!

Lois

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Sweeter:

OK. Here’s what the DR thinks are my hang-ups in getting the weight off:

  1. I hate cooking.
  2. I hate planning meals.
  3. There’s a few diet-like foods I hate: cottage cheese, fish (Unless cooked by another and breaded. Lake fish tasks too fishy.) and a few others I can’t remember right now.
  4. I can’t get off diet soda. It’s either that or stuff my face with food!
  5. I eat for comfort … a big one!!!
  6. Finances preclude buying good, fresh and cheap foods a lot. In the world of low finance there is no such thing a low carb!!!
  7. I’m stubborn!!

Well, what can we all do?

Lois

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Lois: Just by writing all this stuff down and venting has to help. I feel the frustration ALL the time. For me, I hate cooking, too. I’m just not disciplined enough to do it and I’m not very good at it. I’m also just about to be divorced and now have to take care of my own food (and my daughter’s, but she’s really easy) for the first time in almost 20 years and, frankly, living in a big city, I would prefer most of the time to just order something to be delivered.

I’m also lazy about exercise. I know what I should do, but, honestly, most of the time I really don’t feel like doing it.

I know that I am under my best control when I am logging all my carbs and calories, and keeping a food log. I know that I will need it when I go to the endo and nutritionist. And, I do it for a little while, then I slip up (eat something that I should have resisted), and I stop doing it.

Where does this leave me – sometimes down, at a loss for how to motivate myself, unhappy that I give in to that package of Mint Milanos that is calling out to me.

I don’t plan meals, but I guess I am fortunate in that I am comfortable having the same thing repeatedly. There are certain foods that are relatively low calorie/low carb that I can eat day after day, and they are easy to make, and I think that ease of making them is a huge factor in getting me to actually cook something. I do a lot of omelets (egg whites, usually; I can buy pourable egg whites by the carton at my local grocery, so I don’t even have to mess with cracking the eggs – see how lazy I am), with vegetables, some sliced turkey or salami from the deli or anything else I can find. Sometimes, I will do them scambled in a wrap bread.

Amarilis and Sweeter have great suggestions. I’m going to adopt some of them. I grill chicken often – it is the only protein my daughter eats (lunch and dinner, every day), so I always make more than she will eat and save it for myself. Canned tuna and salmon are great (I mix them with a little bit of vinagrette salad dressing).

Don’t aim for perfection. Just take baby steps and see if you can make things a little better. Set small goals so they are easy to get to. Then, when you reach it, set the next one. Our lives are always a battle. We cannot stop working hard, and it sucks that the rest of the world goes on around us and, at least superficially, it seems so easy for them. Eat whatever/whenever they want, exercise or don’t.

One other thing: Get a new doctor. I had one who sounds like yours. “Had” being the operative word. Find someone who understands you and understands your personality and is willing to work with you within the confines of what you are able to do.

And keep the OC posted on how you are doing. We all struggle. Often. Godspeed!!

P.S. What’s wrong with diet soda? I just finished lunch, and my sixth of the day.

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Jonathan:

I was goiing to respond to this comment three times and got interrupted each time. Frustrating?!

I know there are a lot of things I could do if only I hadn’t convinced myself that I hate them. Many of those “hates” are just because they cause pain. I could try to get meals on wheels but they are not only expensive, but I hate hospital food and white bread and lunch meat! Get it?!

I could, but … I could, but… if only … All sorts of language; all sorts of excuses. I guess I should really just put aside one day a week to cook things and freeze.

The DR that yelled at me was my primary, not my endo. But I can understand his frustration with me. He only wants me to get beyond what’s blocking me and get moving.

Diet Coke? Nothing really wrong, but it has been stated that it is actually harder to lose weight drinking soda. I just heard this from a physical therapist friends of mine. Also, the salt must not be too good for me with the lymphedema. Speaking of Diet Code, I was going to go out and actually get a 12-pack.

Hey, I dropped my keyboard just now and everything got much larger. Actually, it’s great because it’s been hard for my eyes to read it.

Lois La Rose

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Lois, I want to ask you 2 things.

  1. Do YOU want to get more healthy or is this something you are thinking about b/c your doc yelled at you? And I mean really want. Are you mentally in a place right now where you can make changes. Well maybe not b/c you did say you were depressed. The thing is that it sounds like you are trying to resist outside forces acting upon you. We all know that saying, Change comes from within, blah blah blah.

  2. Let’s say someone else had written your original post – what would you say to them?

I got your msg. I will reply but must tend to kidlets right now.

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Oh Sweeter:

I just KNEW that someday, somehow my own words would come back and bite me in the butt! Since when did anyone listen to me??? :slight_smile:

Actually I don’t know where it’s coming from. I’ve been disgusted with my body in a major way for quite a few months now but I seem to be stuck in the mud. I guess I would try to encourage that someone to get professional help on all levels, including psychological – to knock out those barriers to me getting off my fat duff and actually doing something.

I guess I need a plan that will be practical and get me started on the road to success. I know that I cannot do this alone. That’s the problem. I KNOW a lot of things, imiplementing them is hanging me up. Since I am a visual person and usually quite organized, I think I need some “aids” to get it all down in a visual way.

Yet, I know I need a strong “circle” of friends for support … not nagging … but support and encouraagement. I don’t mind suggestions from all around, but I think I a little bit shy to keep it open for the more intimate, day-to-day events. Especially since I mentioned a certain person’s input!!

I had better shut up in the future! You never know when your own words are gonna come back atcha!!!

Talk to you later.

Lois

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This is very true. I think most of us know what we should do. Why is it doing it so hard? Maybe you could write a list of reasons why. Or make a vision board that could serve as a visual reminder. Could be a fun creative thing to do even.

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I will try to think of more tips, but just an idea for now. I don’t have time to cook during the week. So I cook a big portion on the weekends (usually two different dishes) and eat them all week. It doesn’t bother me to eat the same thing everyday. If I make two dishes, then I alternate. It is hard to cook for just one, but cooking a bigger portion and eating leftovers is a good solution.

More ideas to come later (as I think of them!!)

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Kristin:

Thought of that already. Wwould have to force myself to cook but I think it could be done.

Keep the ideas flowing.

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Life’s really philosophical questions!!!

Yes, definitely need to buy a display board with my tax money and put it up somewhere I can see it EVERY day!! Good Idea. Don’t let me forget this one. It’s worth spending the money.

Lois

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Amarilis:

I’m going to have to print out and highlight things on these messages to keep them organized and making sense in my head. Too many thoughts swimming around in there will only cause collisions! I can see where a display table board wowuld really help! Right on my kitchen table!! Get plenty of colored index cards, markers, push pins and recipes and I’m all set! Lucky I have most of these things. Now you know what I mean by visual, don’t you. I meant it, too. Sometimes (since I got sick in '04), the abstract drives me crazy and only gets me to turning in circles like a doggie trying to trample down the grass for a bed.

Actually, this is kind of getting me a little excited! NOT IN THAT WAY, SILLY! If I didn’t seem to get excited by what the Metabolic Clinic told me to do, is because they only said to lose weight, eat three meals or more a day and exercise. NOT HOW!! Nothing practical except for, maybe, writing down what I eat. I think y’all have succeeded in getting me a bit more excited than 6 months at the clinic.

Keep it coming. Maybe I will take the chance of exposing myself to y’all. Unless, of course, we can develop a subgroup of a few with off and on reports going out to the general community. Sweets, you know why!

Lois

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do you have a slow cooker, Lois?

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good info here!