This was originally posted to my blog, Diabetes Odyssey.
I hate to see my mom cry. It hurts to see her hurt. She’s going through a really trying time right now. She’s always a trooper, she does what needs to be done. She stays tough. So when she does break down and weep, you know she’s really hurting.
I want to take her pain away. Fix her troubles and make it all alright again. But certain things can’t be changed. Certain events in life must happen and all we can do is live them.
So I held her for a moment and let her cry. I cried with her, for her. She broke down several times throughout the morning. She would only let go for a minute, and then gather herself again. I kind of wanted her to just let it all out, but I know she couldn’t…at least not in public. I’m pretty sure she will cry herself to sleep tonight. We’re the same in that respect.
After leaving the hospital, Mom and I picked up a family friend at the bus station. Another person who could be there for support during this time. We went to lunch. Things were refreshing and happy for mom, if only for a couple of hours.
When it was time, Mom dropped me off for my group therapy. Today there was only one other person in my group that I recognized from previous groups. The other few people were new to me.
When it was my turn to share I told them all about how shocked my husband was that on Saturday I got dressed and asked him to go with me to get some groceries. In other words, I was the one who wanted to go out in public, around other people!
That’s big progress for me.
I also talked about my morning and how seeing my step-father’s deteriorating condition, and also seeing my mom in pain, broke my heart.
After talk time we went to art time. I chose a new picture to color, this one of butterflies.
I am happy to report that I actually actively joined in on conversation with two other patients and the therapist.
That’s big progress for me.
After therapy I chatted with one of the patients as we both walked out to the parking lot. I enjoyed it.
That’s big progress for me.
