We went to the Health Educator yesterday, my newly diag. husband and I. I have been diagnosed since 1999, and he just three or four weeks. It took an act of God to get him to go, but I was hoping we'd learn something that we didn't already know. He has been with me to all but two of my appointments in the last 11 years. He is an organic cook and baker who uses all naturally grown, and non-processed foods (healthy) in his meals at home and 95% at the restuarants he has worked in. We had approximately 8 eight questions we wanted answered...and we would have been on our way. But 90 minutes later, we left feeling about as knowledgable as a slug, and as angry as a bull in the ring. She told us nothing we didn't know, didn't bother to answer our questions, and treated my husband like he was a child. My husband is not the type of person who likes or wants to be touched by people he doesn't know. Everytime she brought up the subject of weight, which he knows more than anyone that he is overweight, she'd pat his stomach! He moved her hand once and asked her not to do that again, and yet she still continued. Our questions had to do with # of carbs he should be eating, his medications, times of testing, any of the things that wouldn't apply to me, or be general question, question about his circumstances. He left ticked as could be and has sworn he will NEVER go back, he will find his own answers from others in the field. I am so angry, I am considering writing her a letter so that I don't embarass myself by screaming.
So the reason for my message here? Find a person who treats you with respect and will answer your questions. If that is not a medical person, so be it. Many people have told me we find our own way through diabetes and use the medical people for our scripts etc. I was hoping this were true yesterday...that we had found that person...now I have to talk dh into following what we really knew already. Thanks for letting me vent here before I write her letter. We will be fine, he has checked his FBS this AM; took a good snack with him for work, and is planning on stopping at the gym about a membership on the way home. No thanks to her.
If someone touched my stomach after I asked them not to, I'd lock their elbow and show them how easy it is to destroy their elbow once it's locked and tell them not to do it again. Maybe I'm more sensitve about my abdomen with all the junk plugged into it though?
Well, maybe not but that is **really** obnoxious. I applaud your husband for joining a gym, that's a big hurdle to overcome. I hope he can keep at it. I only did a gym for a little bit but kind of liked it as you have different options for working out. We got some gym equipment *free* with a treadmill and I like to use it. If you do it seriously, I think that it's a decent workout and I feel very fortunate to have one in my basement.
Hi Cathy. Well, actually I'd hold off on that letter. You will need to find a medical person to help out, and really, there are some good ones out there. What you don't need is that letter following you into the future. When you find a compatible and helpful medical person, you can tell him/her about that experience if you'd like. Anyway, my two cents for what it's worth!
To many people just consider that they have a job and once they get comfortable in that job they just stay there. There's no reason to be helpful or learn anything more about their job to be really helpful to those who really need to know. You must of ran into that type of person. Sorry it happened, I know many in the medical and diabetes profession that are really knowledgeable and helpful. When they give you their 24 hour a day cell phone number and say call anytime you've found the right guy. I've found such people I hope you find one too.
Cathy, I'd be mighty pissed off too! I agree with Trudy though - give a bit more thought to sending a letter as it WILL follow you. Maybe write it and file it away.
There really are good endos/CDEs out there who can answer your questions, give good guidance, etc., though as you know it's mostly up to you. Will he come on here? If he asks a few questions he'll get tons of input on carbs, substitutions, recipes, etc. from which he can choose what will work for him.
Had the exact same thing happen to me on my 1st visit with an "Educator". Had this woman sitting across from me telling me that I needed to eat 150 to 180 carbs a day, when eating 40 in a meal put me over 200 ( and feeling like crap). It does take a lot of switching educators, doctors etc. until you find one who actually knows their buisiness. Love my Endo now but dealing with the nurses in her office has left me frustrated. (And I'm a nurse myself.) NOBODY should be treated like you were.
I think a lot of times dr's are good for Rx's and a tool...that might point you in the right direction, and Im not saying this about ALL Dr's or CDE's. But D is especially tricky to manage and as we have all experienced there is not a generic treatment plan that fits all of us. D is really one of those illnesses where the patient has to be the researcher, take a very active approach in his/her own management, and learn unfortunately from trial and error. For me I can even years of diabetes can still manage carbs fairly well, on average for me, I average around 50 to 60 grams per meal, for others that # would run them way up. I tend to be very insulin sensitive 1 unit up or down for me can send me way up or crashing REALLY fast. That is one of the most frustrating things about this disease is there is no rhyme or reason to it at all. I'd suggest though to at least maybe look around for a different office or practioner to deal with. If you are lucky enough to have a decent choice where you live. The most important thing while the CDE or Dr might not be all into low carbing, etc is to find someone who at least respects the patient and tries to educate them to the best of their ability without being patronizing. You always have to be your own best advocate and it is always learning, and researching and trial and error finding a treatment plan and a diet plan that works for YOU.
I'd definately encourage your husband to check out this site. Definately a lot of good advice and years of experience and what others have found works good for them to gain some insight from.
Unless that DE is examining something, she has no right to make touches. Everyone has a personal space that is only invaded by special people. I agree that you should just pleasantly walk away from this person and investigate another CDE or endo. There is no reason for that treatment and disrespect.
Having said that, did you have specific questions that you needed answered and did you directly pose those questions to the educator and press her until you were satisfied with that answer. Sometimes I have a list of questions, and bring those questions to the appointment. When my CDE sees that paper, she asks what I have and immediately addresses them. That keeps me in charge of the appointment. As patients, I believe that we should always be in charge, or at least, in control.
Another thing to look it, is what he is consuming every day. Eating all natural ingredients is a good thing, but diets such as that can be rather carb heavy, and some things may need to change within that diet. I hope you understand carb counting and are practicing it within the foods eaten every day. I suspect your educator was trying to get that point across, but did a poor job of explaining those concepts to you.
I have had a similar experience, when a dietitian told me how to cook everything and after her presentation, I told her that I didn't cook. She cried, I learned nothing and didn't return to that endo/DCE clinic. One more thing, don't be afraid of insulin.
First I do think you have a legitimate complaint because unless the CDE was performing a physical examination (which I highly doubt) touching your husband like that in the first place was inappropriate. Continuing to do so after he specifically asked her not to was absolutely inappropriate even if she/he was performing a physical examination.
So I would write that letter but not to the CDE and not while you're still angry. I'd wait until you've calmed down and can do it rationally and with facts rather than emotion and take it straight to customer service or to her superviser. Normally I wouldn't go straight to the big guns but this is just too much over the top and totally inappropriate. Speaking here not only as a person with diabetes but as a nurse. That's absolutely appalling.
I ever send letters like that until a couple days after I have written them --- learned that the hard way ---- we live in a small community and they follow you around forever as you said. But....that being said, I will talk to her if I don't send the letter, just to let her know what the ground rules are if we should ever need her again. Probably not.
I have a PA I love dearly....and would love to see my dh see her, but he wants a man. The doc is okay, but very busy since he is a favorite with the big strong farmers in the area. We do have a dietician who has been t here since my diagnosis....so am sure we will be using her rather than this dudette....the diet. is also a CDE
Brian, thanks for the replay. I did e-mail her a list of things we wanted to be addressed, talked with her before the appt, gave her our stats and our history with "D". So she understood that we didn't have time to waste, hers or ours, yet, I think she has a job to do, has been doing it for so long that despite my questions to her, my husband's questions, also, she had to do her routine, and nothing was going to stop that. We don't have an endo within 200 miles of us, and that's a little more spendy and farther than we can afford to go in the winter. So for now we take our biz elsewhere and learn on our own....sad way to be introduced to diabetes.
