So, I’ve never blogged ever…
I’ve written many blogs in my head, but there have been so many things of so much magnitude going on, that they have all turned out to be self-reflective-beyond-the-point-of-being-cool, or poor-me-and-life’s-not-fair, or woops-that-would-have-been-a-good-one-but-I’ve promptly-forgotten-it. So I’m trying this…
I bought some new clothes and shoes a month or so back. I love them all. It was time for a change. Other than that though, I am for all intents and purposes completely unchanged externally. However, inside I am so different it is unreal.
In a nutshell: My hubby was diagnosed with Type 1 in January 2005. That fateful Friday the 13th we learned of diabetes and that a bs reading of over 800 meant time in intensive care and a life-overhaul. For all I’ve bitched and moaned about my life at times, and marveled at it’s awesomeness other times, I never really quite realized how wonderful it was until just about everything about it has been changed or challenged. My Life = Good is something I intellectually knew and even could verbalize somewhat, but still a fact that I couldn’t quite appreciate the hugeness and realness of until I’m now forced to see it in the rearview mirror.
One year into our marriage and David is diagnosed. This was a very humbling experience. I realiize how much I took and still take for granted being able to just pop something in my mouth without even thinking what is in it or how it will affect me. There is nothing quite as bonding as going through diabetes education and learning what to do for survival. Despite his sometimes depression at not being able to function 100%, this whole diabetes thing has actually been a fun, challenging, growing time for us as a couple. Our first ER trip together, let’s make a scrapbook page people! Not saying I would ask for this, but it’s made us aware of how much we do for and mean to each other. It’s good to have a constant someone in your corner.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to today’s round of…. Your Life! Where big things make you realize the small things are both unimportant, and also all we have. Where you have to live each day one day at a time, no matter how insurmountable the big-picture future seems. Where hope and joy abound when you are careful not to focus on the unfair, difficult, or hard to believe things. Where each day is a gift, not in the corny overused saying way, but in the Oh My God! if you really think about it, it will blow your mind kind of way. Where things are crappy and yet still so so good. Where even if you do find out good news, people you love still have bad news to deal with, but you can help them with their burden. Where even if you get bad news you have to keep on keeping on. Where nothing is black and white, and worry and anger is wasteful. Where no matter what your problems, you can get through them, and could probably find someone in a worse off situation that could be helped by fortunate you. Where every time a door seems to close in your face, there are unlimited other possibilities that if we only could seize and appreciate them, could lesson our sorrows and bring us new unplanned joys. Where family pulls together when you need them the most. Where friends step up to let you know your friendship is deeper than the good times. Where people all around you rise to the occasion and remind you that even though it sucks too…. life is good.
This whole blog was brought on by an event that happened on my way to work…Stay tuned. Thanks for reading.