Person with bad sweet tooth

I have been recently asked by my sister not to have sweets around the house when she is here. My sister stays with me due to she travels and works in the city I’m at, otherwise, she will have to travel 100 miles each day. So she stays with me for a few days during the week.

My sister who is not a diabetic, but who is dieting. I am the one who is the type 1 diabetic.

I have been cooking foods that I find intersting from like dlife, diabetic cooking, along with other diabetic cooking resources. I have also have found that instead of going to the grocery store / or the local gas station to rampage the candy isle. I have found making deserts.

With this is where the issue comes into play. I have made angel food cake and it can sit on the counter for about 2 -3 days in the glass cake display when I’m only the one here. When my sister comes, I’m luck the angel food cake will last a shelf life of 4 hours.

(Keep in mind, both of us works nites)

I know my sister has a bad sweet tooth, due to I have had candy in my bag I take to work, or chips, and I’m sorry, but she sniffs them down like a blood hound dog.

I have been asked by my sister not to have sweets in the house when she is here. I in return have told her have some self control over the sweets I make.

One night on night off, I had made a frozen yugurt pie that is diabetic safe, was going to share it with people from work. Placed it in the freezer to set it, woke up in mid afternoon and found the whole 12 inch roud pan in the sink. Sorry, but I was pissed.

I had confronted but was told you should have had a note on it. Same thing when I had made 2 “Angel food Cakes” for a pot luck at work. They were savagely eatten.

I’m really not sure what I can or should do. I feel like I’m dealing with a child here at times that is out of control. I would like to have deserts that are for diabetics in the house, but when sister comes to stay, it comes to a dead stop.

I can’t imagine going into anyone’s house & doing what your sister has done, brother or not. You shouldn’t have to put notes on food in your house - it is your house and your food. Tell her that if she wants a piece of anything that she needs to ask permission first or she needs to find someplace else to stay. Either that or you will have to put a lock on the cupboards and fridge in your house.

I’m not trying to be offensive here at all, but it sounds like your sister has an eating disorder, and not just a “sweet tooth.” I used to work at a treatment center for women with eating disorders, and what she’s doing sounds a lot like binge eating. If that is the case, she might literally not be able to apply self control right now and she might need some professional help. Now, I could be totally wrong, but if you feel that this might be the case with your sister (please google it and look it up and learn more if you do), please encourage her to get some professional help, if you’re relationship is such that you can talk to her about that sort of thing.

Looks like sis definitely has issues with food, especially sweets. I would not give in to her request but a little understanding on your part would not hurt either. Sounds like she needs help, those type food issues are a result of another problem which I suspect is emotional in nature. Maybe some counseling is in order. I’m sure her eating addiction does not exist only when she is visiting your house.

I say help her to solve her problem then maybe you can have your cake and eat it too. ( Sorry I couldn’t resist )

Does sound like your sister has no self-control to have eaten an entire pie. Since she’s dieting & has a real problem avoiding some foods, it would be supportive not to have tempting things around for the two days a week she stays with you. Understand your anger at her devouring your pie & cakes.

Chadd, You are really to be commended for your diabetes-great-cooking!
Does your sister also vomit afterwards? This would move the disorder toward bulimia.
Do you have more family that would help intervene so that she can start meeting with a therapist?
Call her bluff and put notes on. My guess is she will still think she has a right to the food!
Think about how you might charge her for food. Track your costs for a week, then talk with her about the costs and how you need reimbursement.
Look up a therapist for eating disorders who is nearby - and give warning that she will not, starting in 3 weeks - give a date - be able to live with you unless she goes between now and then, and establishes a regimen of meetings with him - and tell the therapist you want to ensure she has seen him since she cannot live with you otherwise, so you want to know via a phone call to his office that she has been there. Tell him to get her permission.
Change your locks.

If this was my sister, I would make a big chocolate cake with a half dozen packages of Ex-Lax and that would put an end to the uncontrolled harvesting of sweets. But you are not me. And this is your sister, she is family. You have to decide on whether you want to intervene in her life or not. If you choose not to intervene, then you will need to compromise. This means that you can no longer trust that any food won’t be eaten in a binge by your sister. No more angel’s food cake and no more yogurt.



ps. And remember to put a note on the Ex-Lax cake reminding your sister not to eat it.

BSC, that’s what my brother did when he was living in a student dorm and got fed up with people stealing his milk! He got 2 cartons of milk and labelled them ‘one of these cartons of milk has laxatives in it, and only I know which one it is’. After that, nobody stole his milk anymore.



Chadd, I agree with the other posters who say that your sister has an eating disorder and that she should get help for it.



My question is - would she have done the same if she were staying at a friend’s house? In my experience, family members tend to take liberties with other family members which they would not take elsewhere. My little brother is used to being the baby of the family, so he just takes for granted that my parents or big sister will pay for everything. He still thinks that way although he’s now 28 and has a well-paid job. When he goes out for a meal with his friends, he would never dream of not paying for his share, but when he’s out with my parents (now both retired), he always expects parents to pay and gets huffy when I suggest that he should at least take turns to pay.

PS I hope you keep your hypo treatments under lock and key!

LMAO!! BSC, that was my FIRST thought when I red this! The Ex-Lax thing works well. It’s a good response for a thoughtless and rude house guest. I would do it and revel in my success. However, it does sound like she has some issues that take this beyond rude and thoughtless and she probably needs some help to resolve her issues. In this case a punitive prank is probably not in order… I would say though that a confrontation / intervention is. Taking a piece of cake is one thing, but devouring the entire UNTOUCHED item is way over the top.

I agree with the others who have said that your sister seems to have serious food issues that are beyond a “sweet tooth”. I am not going to venture to diagnose over the internet if your sister has an eating disorder (or which one) but there is little doubt she has little control over her behavior. She is not doing this to offend you and I’m sure it fills her with guilt and remorse. On the other hand it is causing a rift in your relationship. You don’t have a lot of easy choices here. If your relationship is such that you can talk about it you can, as others have suggested, do that and encourage her to get help if she admits she needs it which she may or may not be able to do. It rarely works to pressure someone or “require them” to get help, they have to want to do so. Just fyi if she is open to help, in addition to professional help that is available Overeater’s Anonymous (OA) is a free self-help group that has live meetings in most large towns or cities as well as online meetings. It is a great source of support and understanding.



Your other option is to only bake on the days she isn’t there. That will just remove the problem. It sounds like you have issues with being restricted in your own home, and I understand that, but I believe you have more control over your behavior than she does at this time. Which leads to a final option, asking her no longer to stay at your house which of course comes with its own impact on your relationship.



I’m a little curious as to what you consider “diabetic friendly” cakes and pies, but that is pretty beyond the point. Whether these cakes contain real sugar or not, her excessive consumption is causing problems. Just fyi I have 17 years recovery from an eating disorder and haven’t eaten sugar at all in that time. It no longer tempts me at all and I can be around people who bake or eat sugar items with no problem. When I first stopped eating sugar it would have been very hard for me to do so especially if it was somewhere I was staying and so had easy and private access to these foods. If your sister admits to having a problem and wanting help with it it would be very supportive of you to not have baked goods around. When I first stopped eating sugar I went to a gathering at the home of a good friend who is an excellent baker. She knew it would be hard for me to sit there while others were oohing and ahhing about the desert. She especially made me a cheese/fruit plate (this was pre Diabetes) and a cappuccino so I would have something I could enjoy at the same time. In 17 years I’ve never forgotten how much her doing that meant to me.