Responses to Loved Ones


#21

Wow DrBB, this is the absolute best explanation I’ve ever read.


#22

:joy: I loved this, thank you.


#23

Or how about in a movie (or even in real life) when someone asks if you need insulin because you are hypo. sigh.


#24

Or when they ask what you need for a hypo and you reply candy or food and they try to give you something that’s sugar free or diet coke :rofl:. Of course my entire family knows exactly what to do in any situation where I actually need help but acquaintances often don’t have a clue.

To the OP though I find it odd that people who know you well are accusing you of using your lows for attention when really all most any of wants is to not be low anymore without having a rebound high. Low and high bg’s have a big impact on my personality and my physical well being ie; headache, tiredness, cranky, emotional. Maybe they need a refresher on what lows and highs actually make you feel like.


#25

I just try to manage it myself now because family is useless, even detrimental at times, especially when I’m actually in a bad low. Although at other times they are asking how is bg etc and are sympathetic to my long stories of a crash etc. I shut my basal off, drink the sugar etc. and test away, lie down etc if it’s bad, rest if milder. My cat Wiz was the best, my current kitty, not so much, he is more self centered but he can be very supportive too.


#26

Thanks @Firenza, I’m pleased to note this morning that I have been fortunate enough to step back from this person and move on. I’m grateful for a close family support team!


#27

As I’m thankful for my bull boxer Rocco, he can sense when I’m not feeling well and tries to console me (unless he is really salivating over my low blood sugar treat). :joy:


#28

I hate the judgement. Mine are not with lows, but with highs. Anytime my parents come over to my home or I go there, I am super conscious of what I eat. My dad, who can lose weight by thinking about losing weight and does not have sugar issues, is the most unhelpful. My dear mother made me a cake for my last birthday. She worked really hard, and I, as a diabetic was prepared given the face that it was my birthday and assumed we were having cake. I knew what I was doing. My dad gave my mom a really hard time for making THAT cake for a DIABETIC. How dare she? I felt really bad for my mom. I was disgusted he thought he had to police my birthday meal. Ultimately, however, I really believe he is just worried about me. But geez, find a different way to show it :slight_smile:

We know our bodies best. I think most people are acting from a place of concern and lack of knowing what to do. They want to help, but they don’t know how. They offer suggestions that are not usually appreciated, because again, we are the experts, not them.

I feel like I’m rambling, making arguments for both sides, but it can be complicated. Especially with family who are already complicated…eye roll


#29

Navigating the landscape of a close relationship was a lonely trek in the beginning. 18 years ago, at the age of 40, I became T1D and for the first few years, I felt I had to hide my lows because the reactions of family members felt too extreme. But hiding it was never right for my condition nor fair to my wife. Clear, honest, and open communication is the only way to right relationship. I’m still working at this continuing challenge. It’s difficult sometimes, but at least the two of us are on the same path.


#30

Now obviously we know as type 1’s that this is not the case

As usual, I am fascinated by the trouble Elyssia Reedy took to add those three words. I am also aware of what my first professor of logic would have said about them, that they are added to distinguish between this subject-group, “type 1s”, between some other group, maybe type 2s or type 3s, to whom such covert attention-seeking behavior can indeed be reasonably attributed.

As a type 2 (with some other major endocrine disorders) I could probably describe to Elyssia Reedy some HG signs and symptoms which she would find amazing. As a researcher, I could probably supply some truly amazing statistics (admittedly decades old) on the death of type 2s from HG.

But all I’d get would be a proliferation of excuses, and who would listen, anyway?

It’s no wonder the world looks the way it does. I could quote Donne, I could quote Niemoeller, I could quote Romain Gary. The point is, it is always somebody else.


#31

This is the response I get from my husband accusing me of not eating enough. I have Reactive Hypoglycaemia and am currently seeing an Endocrinologist. I don’t eat much because small amounts of carbs send my glucose levels up then crashing.


#32

Eating/drinking simple carbs and laying down is the proper way to handle low glucose when you haven’t passed out. and having someone monitoring you is ideal. Your heart races during low glucose events which one reason why it’s so important to lay down and not stay active which could lower your glucose even more. Moving around also sets you up for hurting yourself if you collapse. Great self management with the help of your monitor!


#34

@mohe0001 I wonder why you say it has to be a man to tell these people off??Women are quite capable don’t you think?


#35

@Elyssia_Reedy @Becky_G

I’ve always found the judgement associated with us as T1D’s experiencing hypos is just human nature. Unless you’re lucky enough to have a partner who’s also T1, there’s no reason to think they’d actually understand what it’s like walking “the blood sugar high wire” (hope @DrBB doesn’t mind my using his analogy).

We’re referred to as “brittle diabetics” because our loved ones somehow think that that vial of insulin contains a complete cure, rather than just a stopgap measure to attempt to keep the roller-coaster in the park.

Even my (now adult) kids think I’m a diabetic failure because I’m not perfect. Those expectations are pretty darn hard to live up to. :disappointed:


#36

I think its just easier. We’ve had this conversation before. Its just been my experience that difficult personalities are more often to obey boundaries when there is a greater underlying physical threat to their person. Sometimes thats what it takes. LOL.

As an example, take the insulin manufactures. They were not motivated to do the right thing until they felt threatened. That took a federal hearing.

A large, dangerous looking friend can do a lot to improve ones quality of life…especially, if you are kinda pretty or have a sweet, polite affect that makes people feel comfortable behaving badly. They do it unconsciously.


#37

Heehee, I’ve seen some large dangerous looking women whom I would never want to meet in a dark alley.

I consider myself smaller than average and I am pretty but I make my presence known when I feel there is something to defend. Havingsaid that, I do understand what you are saying in general. Especially with the older generation. It’s a different generation of women now who know how to stand up for themselves and I believe it comes from self confidence and upbringing.


#38

Thats true - I’m from the Nordic north. Lots of us are large. Its also true that not just any man will do. You need the type of person that, if they were to walk into a bar, people would freeze and you hear people inhale suddenly with fear. Some very nice people, just have that look about them. I call it, “the sculptured bone structure of old Russia.” Sharp angles and large features. They make great friends for those of us with somewhat smooshy faces.


#39

I just let them know how serious t1d is. And completely disregard any negative pokes at me - remember don’t be offended by stupidity ( / just not knowing )


#40

I hate to ask this but how did you manage to hide it? I get so spacy eyed that it’s always a given. :joy: Again I hate myself for even asking because I shouldn’t want to hide it. (Sigh)


#41

Much support for you Jim_in_Calgary!