“A Las Vegas woman told police she was “happy” her
2-year-old son drowned in a backyard pool, because she wouldn’t have to
worry about treating his diabetes, according to an arrest report. Mary
Jane Lopez, 22, was arrested Monday, eight days after the boy’s death.”
http://www.lasvegassun.com/news/2010/may/12/police-mother-said-she-was-happy-son-drowned/
“I think it will be easier that I don’t have to worry about him
anymore, about him suffering from diabetes and measuring his insulin."
http://www.ktvu.com/news/23530872/detail.html
Criminy, I want to throw up.
I am just speechless.
I read the story a little more closely and I’m starting to think her statement might be taken out of context.
It’s inexcusable that she left her child unsupervised like she did, but i’m not sure her statements were as selfish as they’re made out to be. Some people are inarticulate and throw out their words in the wrong order or without any nuance. Possibly she thought her child’s life was going to be one of misery and pain and she means to say that she’s glad he won’t have so suffer. That may be ignorant, but it’s not uncaring.
But then there’s the part about not having to measure out his insulin every day. Still, at least she was doing it, pain in the ■■■ that it might have been.
None of this makes it any less tragic. If she didn’t want to care for her child, i’d have taken him.
Terry
Horrifying on many levels.
While I think some of it was taken out of context, the statements made are appalling. You know just as well as I do that diabetes doesn’t have to be a pain in the ■■■… it’s just about the attitude one has about the situation. While I don’t know the situation this family was in, I feel like some diabetes education could have helped change this mother’s perspective.
Even though it can be a struggle, I feel that a mother should never says she’s happy that her son is dead.
What bothers me the most, I think, is that there are other stories about irresponsible parents.
This one always stands out in my mind:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/1583169/Diabetic-girl-dies-as-parents-pray-instead-of-calling-for-medical-aid.html
I’m with Terry on this. I did not read anything suggesting that the woman held malice towards her child or wished him harm, diabetes or not. Sure, she may have neglected the child and this tragedy ensued, but the media seems all to ready to leap on this young girl and declare she “murdered” her child. A truly sad story, but the real tragedy is that the poor child drowned, not that he had diabetes.
well, she was negligent. she should be prosecuted for that…i can’t put myself in her place to try to understand or guess where her statements come from. that poor baby.
It’s hard to say, in these news articles sometimes, what a situation is like… She seems like an exhausted, tired out, teen mom. Look at her, she’s 22, and she already has how many kids now? 3 or 4? She has done nothing with her late teens, and young adult life, except have kids… and if she’s from my culture, well, it’s very likely that she may have gotten knocked up, and forced to be with someone because it was ‘the right thing to do,’ and eventually the guy took off. It’s a scenario that plays out day in and day out…
She’s more to me as a neglectful mom, who is completely worn out, and has no sense of how her words are coming out to those who hear them… We know that Diabetes can be a manageable disease, and not a life sentence, but who was around to tell her? Who was around to help her with her child day in and day out? It doesn’t strike me as like her grandparents did much… Not that any of this was their responsibility to begin with, but… I can’t fathom not helping my kids through something so overwhelming. [Anyone ever seen that show “Teen Moms,” on MTV? Or “16 and Pregnant?” There are parents there… who stop completely doing anything else to help their kids at all, letting them basically drown under the weight of their mistake. There’s a time and place for tough love; I don’t think it’s appropriate when a scared teen is clueless, and having a kid.]
The comment about being relieved… It can be embarrassing to admit relief when we are taking care of someone’s health, day in and day out, and that suddenly ends. It’s very hard work, sometimes… and to admit it to someone is to be subjected to insults… because some people thought we weren’t glad to help that person, or devoted to them. (This is most common among those who have to help a person through a terminal illness, every day, for months or years, until the end.) I am sure that to her - young, worn out, inexperienced, and clueless, and on her own - it was extremely difficult to deal with on a day to day basis. I see the frustration when I hear many moms talk about their child, on here… and they are older, wiser, with a husband or partner, and some have a good job, or don’t have to worry about a good job… Now, how much harder would it be if you were just a kid, on your own, with nothing… without a job, or on government aid, with no spouse and no help? Trying to help another kid…
It’s sad, and awful… It really is. Everything about it is just awful. But I’m not going to call her a murderer, or a monster… or anything worse… Who knows if any of us, in those kinds of shoes, would’ve been prepared.
My first thought also was that this sounds like a horrible mom. However, all the posts on here made me realize how important diabetes education is for diabetics and those caring for diabetics. This is a horrible disease for a child to have to go through however it can be done as shown by many of the members here who were diagnosed as children. I only hope that I can use this disease to help someone else.
Yep, some diabetes education would have been in order. We may know that diabetes doesn’t have to be a pain in the ■■■, but this young mother didn’t. As Lizmari says, she’s basically a kid taking care of a kid. What we understand to be manageable she may only know as a lifelong burden with only bad outcomes.
That’s the extent of my sympathy for her, she should be prosecuted for neglect. I think the media, as it is wont to due, and the police are sensationalizing her statement, which comes out of ignorance rather than malice.
“Never attribute to malice what can be fully explained by stupidity.” - I forget who.
Terry
Shocked…
OMG WHAT??? Poor baby!!!
She is a horrible mother. They also mentioned that she was mad because the baby’s father was not doing is part, in addition to that, she told a lie on her mother (grandmother) to police. This ■■■■■ is wicked. Plain wicked.
Any Mom leaving her two year old unattended in a pool is neglectful and it is right she has been arrested. Not sure of the details, though. Mom could have been depressed since the child’s dx and unable to cope, needing psychiatric treatment. I disagree that treating a two year old’s diabetes is not a pain in the ■■■… niece dx’d at eight but I have read it is very difficult to take care of a toddler with D. Taking care of a child with D is heartbreaking at first. Difficult to adjust in the beginning. Most parents spend many sleepless nights making sure their child is safe. I wonder how many children with chronic illnesses fall through the cracks because their parents are not willing to do this. Sound to me like she was saying, he is better off with God, at least he won’t have to suffer anymore… that type of statement. Because the ten fingersticks a day and multiple injections often required is suffering for a two year old. Children are resiliant and will get over this and adjust but it does not sound like the Mother had adjusted
The article says she left for a walk without telling the other adult in the house that she was leaving. So her 1yr old twins and the boy were unattended. She also said that she knew the sliding door leading to the pool was open when she left.
It also says that he had been left unattended for 3 hours.
I don’t care how depressed or overwhelmed you are, you don’t leave 3 children that age unsupervised.
I cannot fathom that kind of outright neglect, diabetic or not. Completely unacceptable.
No matter which way I look at these stories, they still make me sick to my stomach. Children are dying needlessly.
My Mom looked after 3 little Diabetics plus my Sis who was not. My Dad only came home for week-ends usually during the Spring, Summer and Fall when his job took him to various areas not near our home. Sure Mom made many mistakes with our dosages, types of food, etc. since she wasn’t educated properly about Diabetes and since little info was available back then.
I’m sure that she must have suffered some depression because it is not a Happy event to have even one sick Child with a disease/condition. My Siblings and I, did move away from home still alive and mainly healthy. I am Thankful and I do appreciate the many years of my Mom’s(and Dad’s)Love and caring for us and the scary times and stresses that they endured, in hopes that we would be able to live a “normal” Life and go on to outlive them.
God Bless all the Children.
I don’t think anyone is excusing her conduct that led up to this tragedy. It’s her comment afterwards that’s under scrutiny. I think she’s desperately searching for some way to make herself feel less guilty or offer some explanation that will ease the pain. Nothing will excuse her neglect.
It’s not unusual for people to say that a person is ‘better off’’ after they’ve died or that they’ve gone to a ‘better place.’ I think that’s what she’s trying to say in her sad, misguided and inarticulate way.
Terry
I think back to my childhood… I know my mom and dad loved me, but they were scared to death of diabetes, and shots, and urine testing (later bg testing). I was diagnosed in my early teens but I got to take care of all those mechanics by myself and my mom and dad never had to bother. But I’m sure I worried them senseless lots of times.
Yea, I agree. And the press loves to jump on those types of statements.
Inexusable that this happened & a preventable tragedy.