Maybe I didn’t read the same thing you did. I didn’t see an “expressed desire to harm others”. What I read was someone obviously having a hard time and going on a verbal tear. Typically when I see someone angry enough to write what Z Money wrote, Compassion is the ONLY response at that time. But, I took the time to read INTO what Z Money was writing and think about what may have caused him to do so. I guess I’m just more interested in making a comment that might help than commenting for commenting sake. I’m sorry that we didn’t read the same thing. That’s what’s so hard with posts, one can always interpret it differently than the next.
It was a rant Tom… and apparently a long overdue one. Again, compassion is what’s needed at this time. Obviously Z Money is having a hard time, and taking a hard edge stance may NOT be what he needs. Encouragement is what he needs. This site is to SUPPORT people. I think that is what we are trying to do here.
Hey Z Money,
My life sucks too and not just because of the D either - so many other things are wrong. But I keep thinking about the other people who have it worse than me. Like being crushed under a building during the Haiti earthquake or trapped in that mine explosion and waiting to die a painful death - Ew.
I have don’t believe there is anything wrong with death - I would just hope mine isn’t painful - I think I hate pain more than I fear death. And I don’t really fear it - I don’t think there is much going on after death. If there is, you are just moving on to something else and if you do I certainly hope it is better than this. It would be easier being dead honestly.
Just like Jim Morrison said " Life hurts alot more when you die the pain is over."
But it also seems like a big hassle to try to “get dead” right now so I am too lazy to bother right now so I think I’ll just stick around for a bit longer and see what happens. What have I got to lose right? Plus who would take care of my cats? I wouldn’t trust anyone else to do it right so I’ll have to wait until they die first - than I will be all free and clear to die if I need too. 
If I am going to die because of diabetes oh well - what can I do about it if it is really meant to happen, you know? I do my best and if that isn’t good enough, oh well. At least I tried. Either way dead is dead - no matter how it happens. I have decided not stress about it anymore and the only person I have to answer to is me.
There are some good things around I guess at I can still enjoy while I am here. But in general, for alot people, life is a big struggle - no question. But no we are ALL not happy so your not the only one.
Kimberly,
To me, dead is dead also. Over, kaput, the end of the road. If there’s some afterlife, that might be a pleasant surprise, but I’m not banking on it or believe in one. Actually, I think this world would be kinder, far better place if people didn’t believe in concepts like heaven or hell.
definitely a three beer discussion
i would choose cancer or a 45 to the head maybe OD on some haroin
forget it
sorry for what i said im just a quitter always have been i just cant do this all alone sick of the lonly feeling inside
Z Money …what can we do to help ??? …some of us here have lots of life experiences AND living with diabetes …are you willing to accept some suggestions ??
Why do you think you are a QUITTER ??? …maybe start saying : I AM NOT A QUITTER …just may help …
In the end, we are all equal - whether you quitted at things in your life will not matter at the hour of your death so don’t stress about it anymore. Do you know who makes us feel guilty and sad about things we do (or don’t do)? The rest of society. Don’t fall into that trap that you have to be this big successful person every second of the day - Only the score you keep matters.
The same goes true for being sad - there is nothng wrong with being sad esp. when you have things to be sad about. If we weren’t supposed to feel sad, we would not have that emotion. Do not feel bad for being human. It is bad enough we have problems to feel depressed about but than we have everyone else telling us that we need to get happy and if we can’t they want to medicate you. Here comes more guilt than. Guilt because you think you aren;t keeping up with the rest of society - that everyone else is doing better than you. It is all psychology - all in the mind. I have a psych degree so I know.
With the millions of people who apparently have diabetes in the world now, there is NO way one could be alone about this disease. I think you would be surprised at the people who have it and those who have it an don’t know about it.
And , I can guarantee you somewhere there is someone that is doing 10 times worse than you - which means you are doing pretty damn good!
If nothing else, you got a cool user name on Tudiabetes and a cool looking sweatshirt in your pic - scores you two points already in my book!
Z- I can’t even count the number of times I gave up and pretended I was normal. It’s NORMAL to get down with this disease. It’s crappy, it’s not fair, but we’re stuck. When you need help, you have to do what you did. That was a cry out for help and that’s what we are here for. It’s not the same as having support in your every day home life, but we can be as supportive as you need us to be. Let us help you. As you can see, we are willing.
Well said Kimberly. And to Z Money, I just want to add, you are not a quitter because if you were, I don’t believe you will even be on this site.
HERE HERE!!!
Hey Dude,
About your health and how you feel today:…
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
It’s just normal
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
Thats life
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
You cant ‘always’ feel good
You cant ‘always’ feel bad
I like that, Michael… Acceptance, at it’s best. Embrace life as it is…
dude… I think you just wrapped up your feelings in one word “Alone”. I was diagnosed later in life with “LADA” ,which is T1, with my family and life established so have “D” at my age wasn’t a great life changing experience. I also have a son who is 16 who was diagnosed Aug 2009 with T1. As a father I wanted to make sure that diabetes wasn’t going to control his life but he was going to control his diabetes. I have supported him through these past months to make sure that he monitors his sugars and he takes his insulin. One of the best things I have done for him was the Omnipod system. I am not sure of your financial situation but if you can move over to the pump you will find much better control and a new way of life that is so much easier to manage. Again my son is 16 and there are many times when his friends didn’t realize he had diabetes because they never seen him give an injection.
Now I say this because it is so important, especially at your age, to have a support system to help you through. Is your family involved in your diabetic care? I can only imagine how scary it would be not to have a support system and to feel alone. Not to be able to ask question and to always feel that death is around the corner. But you know having diabetes is not a death sentence but more like daily mainteance. Take it one day at a time and set goals for the day. I think the first goal today is to establish a support system whether it be Mom, Dad, older sibling, Aunts, Uncles or even a local pastor. Take with your CDE to see if there is any mentoring programs in your area to help you better manage your diabetes. Once you BG levels off and you get things under better control then you will start feeling better and your anger and fear will subside.
Like others have said on this site we all have “D” and we all have up and down days. We may all seem positive but trust me every one of us have down days where control is difficult and wish we could give up. I have a family, I have a career, I have people who count on me so giving up is not an option. You have many people who count on your and trust me care about you. So giving up is not really the best option.
So please… if anything… post on this site daily and let us know how you feel (just watch the language). I think once you push through this low you will feel so much better.
those exact thoughts go through my head almost everyday z money. You’re not alone hey
Diabetes freaking sucks, everyone know that.
to be honest… If your going to smoke, do drugs and all that other crap your just going to be a bloody idiot. diabetes doesnt define a person but if you do that you’re letting it win. Use that anger for motivation to take control… make diabetes your b**ch and not the other way around
Z - seriously, yes - it sucks to deal with it all day after day after day… no argument. Been here in this life frame for 39 years - I have stories, if you want them… If you need to unload, to yell, to scream, without judgment, feel free to contact me via email. I’ve done truly bad crap in my life, as well as tried some that didn’t work. You are important. I want you to live. Let me know - I’ll be here for you.
My 7 year old son is Diabetic and it bothers me that I have to give him injections everyday, etc. but you know what? I’m so happy that he can walk, play soccer, be a normal boy. I knew someone very close to me who broke his neck and he could not even go to the bathroom without help. Now THAT sucks. My point is, yes being Diabetic sucks but there are a lot worse things that can happen to you than this.
You have the strength within yourself. You just don’t know it. You’re not giving up otherwise you wouldn’t be on this site. You’re young and you can do anything you want to. The world is yours even though you don’t feel it. Don’t let Diabetes destroy your life. The choice is yours.
Hang in there and continue to talk to us. We are all here for you to listen.
Z Money you are right it stinks. I have tried to act normal ( like there is any real normal way to act) by not taking care of my diabetes and that did not work. I think it is a cycle that some of us go through it get better. Talk it out with someone you trust. We are all here to listen, and help where we can.
I don’t think you are a quitter! Stay strong.