How do you guys do it??? and not let it consume your life??? I do feel very much alone…I lost everything since the diagnosis and I’m trying to rebuild my life but I’m not the same person…I don’t feel that I have nearly the emotional, physical and mental strength that I had in the past Any help will be appreciated. Thx
Hi Marga: I am so sorry that you are struggling. As I always say, diabetes sucks and anyone who tells you otherwise is not being truthful. That said, I am at 22+ years with Type 1, and even though it is a challenge at times, I am living well. I think for me a big deal was that after ~1 year of grieving and trying to find my way, I came to a place of acceptance that this is my new life. The old life is no more. The acceptance was everything for me–I didn’t try to achieve it, but it was something that happened. I was fortunate to find a therapist with Type 1 diabetes who really helped me find my way. Have you considered seeing someone? Finally, a big hug through the Internet. I think that TuD is a great place to ask questions and get support from people who truly get it.
I appreciate your response and admire your attitude toward life I do have a therapist and I believed that her young daughter has T1D but she doesn’t share about her life and I respect that. In fact just last week she told me the same thing…“acceptance”…now…how do I get there??? I appreciate your help
The always&perpetuity characteristic of D is a real drag, to say the least. Stay strong, be patient.
I too have had diabetes for 7 years and did eventually find acceptance, but have to admit that some days I am grumpy and kicking against fate. Although you can’t change the diagnosis there is a lot you can do to help yourself. Please take time to learn how to manage your diabetes, how to eat well and how to ensure your future is a complication free as you can manage. Do this one little step at a time, things will slowly get easier. (((Hugs)))
I hit my 7th Diaversary in July. Since being diagnosed I got married, worked a few different jobs, than had a baby and now I’m a stay-at-home (hard working!) mom, and I’m pregnant with my second.
Diabetes certainly affects everyday, and I’m not who I used to be either. I was a strong distance runner, I ate anything I wanted and didn’t think about it. Of course, many life changes later, I’m finding new ways to enjoy exercise and taking care of myself and my family. Although I certainly hate “the betes” it has taught me how to eat better and be more careful, and it makes me consider my long term life goals more.
I hope you can find some, or any, positives that the betes has shown you.
Maybe best of all, you are certainly not alone in your struggles. This forum has been an life changer for me, and I only discovered it two months ago. Please use it, and use us like crazy.
We’re all in this together!
Acceptance…whew! I would say that yoga and meditation really helped me to get there. Plus I exercise a lot–it really helps my mental attitude. There is a great book by Jon Kabat-Zinn entitled Full Catastrophe Living that I would recommend, and Jon is the founder of Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), which is a great program. I would try to find a way to embrace (as best as possible) your New Life. I would take a sheet of paper and write out what my New Life is. And with Type 1, planning is key, because it is challenging to be spontaneous. So have your diabetes kit in order, and carry snacks that will help with sudden exercise. And do you have a Dexcom? I found that was really life changing/life improving. Just a few suggestions, hope some help.
Consider helping others in some capacity. Being meaningfully involved can help you. I have TD2, but must deal with celiac disease. I get the non-stop th vigilance constantly dealing with a life-long illness. It can be overwhelming at times.
I am presently at 25 years with T2 and 5 years on insulin. In hindsight I wish I’d asked for insulin sooner than I did, but that’s another, different conversation.
Having been prone to depression even before diabetes entered the picture, I know that landscape. Too well.
Diabetes is a life- and game-changer, full stop. Like everyone, I have good days and bad. Some days it’s just another chore, like taking out the garbage, and other days it’s infuriating beyond words. The good days far outnumber the bad ones now, but the bad ones haven’t disappeared and I know they never will. I just live with them when they pop up, like I do with the aches and pains I’m collecting with increasing age.
There are lots of suggestions here, all good ones. I would particularly endorse @Cyclinglady’s. We (my wife and I) are both involved in a number of volunteer activities in the community. Diabetes isn’t the only serious cause of stress in our lives right now, and helping others not only helps you feel good about yourself (which is an anti-depressive all by itself), it also gives focus and an outlet for your energy that would otherwise just turn inward and stew. It works. It really does.
I was diagnosed ~10 years ago. I accepted it right away but over time that just wore down. I have been struggling for the past 5 years or so. I find that I find peace with it for a few months at a time now. I am seeking therapy right now and trying to get more exercise.
You live as best you can. I’m coming up on 55 years and struggle.
I agree with Melita that acceptance is a real key in moving forward with diabetes. Like everything else we are all different. For me, it took a very pragmatic evaluation of my life and how I might move forward with diabetes.
I realized that I was going to have to do the work that my body is no longer doing. Instead of being able to eat whatever I wanted whenever I wanted to do it and have my body just make the adjustments on its own, that responsibility now falls to me.
I must determine the appropriate intake to match my expected activity. I can use insulin to adjust the ratio as I need, but forevermore it will be MY JOB to manage the equation. My body can’t do it anymore and no one else can do it for me. So this is my life from now on. Simple really, it is just an unavoidable reality. But no less a pain in the ■■■.
If I can accept this and do what I need in order to understand what is required of me to be successful, then it becomes like any other learned practice or activity. I don’t like doing dishes or picking up after my pets or shaving, to name just a few. But, all these things still need to be accomplished and nothing else nor no one else th do will be doing them either.
Acceptance, I never really accepted the disease, I don’t accept diabetes as my identity, what I do accept are the things I must do, what I must do to live a happy existence. Like someone else said having D is just part of life.
What I have accepted is Life despite diabetes, I don’t have a life with diabetes, I have a life in spite of diabetes.
Thanks Melitta You’re right! So far mindfulness is the only thing that helped me and being around my meditation group is my only support. I did take the MBSR a couple of years ago but it seems that I got amnesia about what I’ve learned I’m afraid to go to yoga…swimming etc…I’m very good at preparing my kit and I just got a CGM which is a lifesaver…but I don’t know why I’m so paranoid about working out…I know that I dropped easily but I always have sugar with me and I had so many low’s in the past that I know how to take care of them…so I don’t know why I’m so resistant to go out I know how to swim so I won’t drown but the idea that a lifeguard would’ve to get me out of there with a low…I just feel that I’d drown out of shame…I know it’s irrational…but so far I couldn’t get motivated to work out…in fact I should start physical therapy for my back pain…of course due to tension…
I appreciate your suggestion to “think” about my new life…it gave me hope
Thanks Randy5…your pragmatic approach toward it makes a lot of sense.
Thanks for the hugs Pastepainter I’m just frustrated because I feel that I probably have a Phd in T1D by now after everything I learned…but my other med issues…back pain, stomach…depression and anxiety have a huge impact no matter what I do I know that exercise and having a new life will work but how do I get myself to move??? I have no energy…it’s a catch 22…if I’d exercise I’d be more energetic…etc…but it seems that my mind is working against me instead of supporting me in getting better…I do know what helps but have absolutely no motivation to do it…it’s like I don’t have faith that it will get better…sorry for wining…
WOW!!! That’s amazing!!! Having babies, work…family and T1D…amazing!!! I lost my job and my whole career after I was diagnosed and I had to get on disability fro PTSD…for loosing my whole family to illnesses and my siblings to T1D…very early in life…Work was my escape from the grief…and with the diagnosis all the pain that I was hiding for years it blew up in my face…I tried like crazy to hang on to my old life and couldn’t…I worked like a maniac all these 7 years to make progress but I feel that my mind is pulling me back…no motivation to get better the T1D drag became quite overwhelming…I wish I would be as strong as you are!!! Keep it up
Thanks cyclinglady I agree with you…helping others is the best…I’ve always done that however…now it’s very hard to commit to a schedule to be somewhere at a certain time since I never know how would I feel that day until I wake up Sometimes I can’t even drive to my meditation class and I feel very angry at myself for not being able to function So far I can’t plan…is only one day at a time. I hope you’re doing well
Thanks David_dns. 25 years is a lifetime…and I do get it since I grew up seeing my brother self-destruct with T1D since I was a kid…I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling with depression and aches and pains…I’m in the same boat…and it sucks! However I appreciate your willingness to get better and keep going strong!!!