I can definately relate to that.
yep – and when my beeper goes off in the middle of a meeting reminding it’s time to test and adjust – gotta take my little bag and go someplace private (most bathrooms are way to icky for this purpose).!
I’m with you on this one too – just got stablized on two major long-term things with docs I finally like and trust – now my insurance is changing and neither doc is on the new plan!!!
Mike-
I understand what your saying…lol that’s why I used the Sundae because I couldn’t think of anything that makes me mad about Diabetes.
Dear Mike
Hmm, I was tempted to react by saying something sarcastic in response to your message.
But in all honesty, I can’t imagine that you never have feelings of frustration with this very high maintenance and challenging disease. It’s expensive, it’s time-consuming, it creates all kinds of dangerous circumstances when you try to live a normal ordinary life – geeze-o-pete, I can’t even sit through a two-hour meeting without running into something that could really set me off kilter (like not doing my follow-up testing right on time).
Seriously, man, take a look at things and be honest with yourself. It makes sense to take a generally optimistic outlook like, I’m thankful for the treatment options I have now (especially the pens and shorter needles and the easier testing supplies). And I’m thankful for the motivation to do this thing that does keep me healthier.
But this particular discussion is about frustrations – can’t tell me that you never have any – get real!
Just a friendly remark
j
Dear Debb
oo – what a jerk to do that – what happened to “in sickness and in health”?
glad to hear you are not holding on to the resentment.
i hope you have others standing by you as you work through such a burden!
hang in there
j
Yes I definitely agree Janet… I try to be as optimistic about this thing that I am now stuck with for the rest of my life but it gets really really hard some days. When people give me that “poor you” look, I tell them, that I’m actually very grateful because I am healthier than I believe I ever would be and I am the most knowledgeable about my health and food, than most people I know. We should all be attentive to our health but us with diabetes don’t have a choice. I also try to remember how terrible I felt right before I was diagnosed and the thought that I would give anything to feel better (even “normal”) again… I hated being told that I was going to have to take shots (I hated needles) but man, did I feel SO much better. It was like a weight was lifted off of me and I felt like myself again… now about 5 years later, it’s a little different and much harder to remember that feeling because I am not around many (if any) other people with diabetes and it makes me feel very alone with this disease, even more so when I have to check my sugar all the time, hold off on snacks at the office, be the last person to start eating because I’ve had to check my sugar and then take my insulin all the while watching everyone else scarf down their meal… What’d I give to just not have to be constantly thinking about how I feel, what I ate, when I last checked my sugar, when I must check it again, etc… Not that I would give feeling different, since I feel so much better physically (I feel healthy) but to take a vacation from all this!! THAT would be super nice.
I HATE this… it makes me sooo angry. But then again, they sometimes feel bad like “whoa, wait, am I being a pig right now?” ummm, yes, you are!!
Me too… It is great when they care, but I hate putting in on other people… I’ve had some pretty bad lows (28) where I NEEDED someone to help me because I was falling down the stairs… and I feel like it’s my responsibility not anyone else’s but yet I can’t rely on just myself.
Hi guys, most the time I don’t resent the D1 too much. However, I love to spend time in my garden and don’t like wearing gloves, especially when planting something. I know with all those little holes in my fingers I need to protect myself, but I resent it!!!
Jonathan, I really like how you’ve taken this approach and outlook about our condition… I like how you rephrased the question!
I agree too, Janet. Resentment isnt something that is always laced through anger. I am not angry about having diabetes. Its more a frustration than anything else.
I just wish sometimes that I could wake up, eat breakfast and be on my way. Instead I, wake up and check my blood sugar. I Inject 30 Units of lantus and read how many carbs are involved with an english muffin, cheese and an egg. I calculate the ratio and inject humulog to cover that and any correction factor. I wait 5-10 minutes and then I can eat and go to work. I know that there are a million other things a lot worse than diabetes. But like Jessica said…some days it just gets really hard.
Ladies, I respect your points but you bring uo some great ones yourself. This IS my normal ordinary life. I’ve met plenty of disabled people that don’t have arms legs or both and they don’t resent not having a limb. It’s their ordinary life. I picked up that angle a long time ago and I guess it just stuck.
i resent being treated like i’m broken. when people know i have diabetes they assume everything that’s wrong with me (if i’m unhappy that day or don’t feel well, for example) is related to my diabetes. it’s taken me many years to be diagnosed with problems i’ve had since even before diabetes because doctors thought i was just a child depressed because i was sick. people think i can never have children. when people treat you as though you’re so sick and fragile sometimes that’;s what you become (and so i did). i once dated a man who called me his “China Doll” because he felt i was so delicate and hand to be taken care of and treated as such. it’s taken me a long time to understand and then make others understand that i will not break. and now there are people who didn’t even realize i have diabetes until they happen to see me test or do a covert site change. there are still always people who will never stop thinking i am made of glass though and will never stop thinking they know what’s best for me.
i also miss just being in the rain. thousands of dollars worth of electronics hooked up to your back can put a damper on walking in the rain.
Debb: Same thing happened to me, though only 16 years if marriage, and “all my fault because I was not able to keep myself in perfect control” and did not embrace her diet and exercise plan religiously. Life gets better, though. It really does. In lots of ways.
My husband isn’t bothered by my diabetes.When I was on injections I was having alot of problems with hypos during the night.My husband is a light sleeper and would feel the bed shake or he would put his hand on my face to see if I was clammy.He has brought me out of Hypos many times throughout nighttimes.He even saved up and got me the pump which we had to pay for out of pocket.
I feel the same way when people think I’m fragile Bek, it’s so annoying, and doubly so because to be honest, I think diabetes makes us stronger. We think and do things differently to other people, and I think the realisation that you’re not invincible makes you a stronger person rather than someone who needs to be protected. Let’s face it, no one else has the ability to control the level of insulin in their body - their pancreas kicks in and does it without their knowledge, whereas we have the power to control it That makes us powerful, not weak.
In saying that, I resent diabetes the most when people pity me, misunderstand me or when I have a hypo at a bad time. During classes for example…I’m very much a perfectionist when it comes to my work at university, and now that I’m in my final year the stress levels are up and this seems to make my sugars rise and fall unpredictably. I just don’t like it when I feel like my education suffers, and I sometimes feel that the past 14 years may have been a little easier in that sense if I didn’t have to worry so much about that.
What I resent the most is thinking about what I’m eating (everytime) and how it is going to effect my readings.
Just once in a while I would like to binge on high carbs and still have desert.
I ususally get all resentful when: my site falls out, my sugar is high, wearing dresses and trying to hide my pump, when my pump wont stop viberating cause i have reminders like “low battery! low cartridge volume! missed meal bolus! site change reminder!” all at once at 7 in the morning. x)
I resent having diabetes during the holiday season especially or during special ocassions, i just had my 40th b-day and my parents got me a cake when we went out to dinner…I haven’t told them yet about my diagnosis. I ate some of the cake and felt guilty. I work at a nursing home and we are always having birthday cakes or some special treat and everyone else is eating it…and because I’m running the function I’m ususally handing out the goodies and it is so tempting…and I hate having to say no. I’ve just gotten in the habit of telling the residents that I have diabetes so they will not force me to join in, but I still resent it. I was never much of a sugar addict before but now that I can’t have it it is always on my mind. UHHHHGGGGGGG!!!