Congratulations on taking charge of your own body! Unfortunately, living in a big city and going to a big hospital doesn't always guarantee decent health care. When I was diagnosed, I was in a well-known hospital in Boston for something else, for which they gave me massive doses of prednisone which, in turn, caused the diabetes. Around the fourth day that I was there, a nurse appeared with a syringe and a small bottle of insulin, announced that I was now a diabetic, and showed me how to inject myself. And that was it! No education, no information. It wasn't until one of my daughters discovered my ignorance and bought me some books on diabetes that I began to learn. And I have a graduate degree! Maybe the nurse thought I already knew about it.
What you may need to do is start planning to cook two separate meals, one for you and one for your husband. It's a lot of bother until you get used to it, but you can fix your plate with a smaller piece of meat and two lower-carb veggies like broccoli and summer squash. Do you get Breyer's Carb Smart down there? It's ice cream that has 4 net carbs, 11 total carbs per half cup. I use that and No Sugar Added puddings for my desserts. Use plenty of seasonings like garlic powder, onion powder, herbs, etc., so that nothing you eat is bland. Keep giving him what he wants and you keep eating what you want. One day, he just may ask to taste or try to eat the way you do if he sees it long enough.
I also use Benecol instead of butter or margerines. I was told to eat at least two tablespoons daily because it helps to fight diabetes. I use it on veggies to help the flavor and dryness.
It's sad when a spouse refuses support. But men are such babies when it comes to taking care of their bodies or seeing doctors. I have a son-in-law who has just been diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins lymphoma and had it for a year, probably because he was too macho (or frightened) to see a doctor. Now, it's in a more advanced stage and not responding to treatment. I think women are more flexible in accepting and changing lifestyles due to medical necessities. Good luck to you! Stick to your guns! It's your body - right?