The questions ALL diabetics hate to hear. I’m beginning to think of not answering these questions any more.
I don’t mean to disrespect my doctor, endocrinologist, significant others, et. al but hey, shut up. It’s MY diabetes. If this was easy then EVERYONE would have diabetes, but it’s not! I got the short straw. So just back off and let me deal with it.
Now, if I’m NOT dealing with my diabetes…then ride me like a 25 cent pony ride at K-mart and pull my hair please!
But I’m NOT a non compliant diabetic.
I eat right (96.4% of the time). I count my carbs. I adjust my insulin based on fat/fiber content, anticipated activity levels, learned internal rhythms etc. After 17 years, I’m at the point where diabetes is a constant background program running in my head. And just like a smart phone battery after 8 hours with a GPS tracking app running forgotten in the background, I do need to recharge once in a while.
I don’t hit the target every time. This is not a contest or sport. This is life. I’m pretty good most times but sometimes I miss. Sometimes it’s my fault. I get lazy and just “wing it” and other times I hit a bad injection site or the insulin goes bad or something else is going on that I don’t know about at the time. (i.e. coming down with a cold the next day or they put sugar in my coffee instead of Splenda.)
Even with all this technology and information, we with diabetes will NEVER be perfect with our blood sugar control. This is life and it’s messy sometimes. My control could be closer to perfect if I did nothing else but monitor my diabetes 100% of the time but it’s hard to make a living doing that. (But if someone will pay me to do this then I will gladly send you my resume!)
My A1C’s have ALL been under 7.0 since I was diagnosed 17 years ago except for ONE time when it was a 7.2. Cut me some F*&king slack and trust that I DO know what the hell I’m doing!
I acknowledge that you are on MY diabetes TEAM. My performance is based on my internal motivation to do well.
NOT on your WILLING me to do well!
I guess I wasn’t a self motivated person until I developed diabetes. I had to become self motivated to manage my diabetes because I felt like ■■■■ if I didn’t manage my diabetes. Diabetes taught me a DIRECT relationship with self motivation and feeling well, healthy, happy and better because with out self motivation life just sucks. Truly sucks.
There is nothing you can say or do that will turn my internal motivation on or off! I rarely need a reminder to do something with my diabetes care. I may forget my glucometer or my insulin but, because this is life, I’ve made a mistake and I will learn how to deal with my mistake and handle the situation. (I have actually, on purpose, done these things so I can learn how to handle these mistakes in the future.)
I WILL NOT DIE INSTANTLY OR GO BLIND OR BECOME IMPOTENT IF I MAKE A MISTAKE ONCE IN A LOOONG WHILE!
Now if these mistakes become a chronic event then something else is going on:
I’ve lost my motivation.
I’m developing Alzheimer’s
Something else is going on.
Questions such as, “Did you check your blood sugars/Why are your numbers high?” will do NOTHING to solve this problem in the above situations.
On Google they have spreadsheets for cats with diabetes…