Well, I have not posted in a VERY long time. I don't want to start writing and have it be blah blah blah poor old me. I try and be an upbeat outgoing person. But lately, it's been hard and I feel like it's all a great big act. I am soooo out of control with my eating, weight and diabetes that's it's ridiculous. I have no idea what to do or where to start. I am going through way too much insulin trying to bring my BG's down, and it's not even working. I filled my resevoir on my pump up on Saturday (it's a 3ml i think) and I had to refill it again today!!! That;s a lot of insulin in 2 days. Plus, almost 2 weeks ago my 'good' eye (I haven't been able to see out of my bad one since September) decided to go on me. Of course, I have to contiue working, but I can't even drive. I'm a Correctional Officer in a maximum security jail and should not even be risking it coming in here with my eyes like they are, but there's nothing I can do. My boyfriend has been amazing, driving me in to work and picking me up even though it's a 20 minute drive and it's at either 6:30 at night or in the morning. But still.....usually my eye clears up within a week, but I think that because my bg's have been up and down that my eye is having trouble healing. I suppose at this point I should mention that I have diabetic retinopathy in both eyes, I also had 2 cataracts removed this year. I thought that my eyes were good till my left one went in September. We tried laser surgery, (god how i hate laser surgery) but it didn't work. Since September my good eye has gone 4 times, but like I said it comes back about a week later everytime. Just not this time. I couldn't even see on Christmas. oh well.
Well, sorry to boo hoo for so long, but it is great to have somewhere to rant where people completely understand. There is nothing in my town , they even closed the canadian diabetes association here. so there really is no support. I hope that all of you are doing well and wish you a happy new year!!!