You know, Nat, everyone has bouts of depression occasionally when they compare their life to others'. Some people envy others' looks, or their love lives, or their jobs. There are lots of ways we can judge ourselves and come up short in our own eyes. It gets easier when you get older and discover that everyone is in the same boat. I'm 65 and I can't live my life like I used to, I can't ride my horse or hike or swim (I have severe neuropathy). But there aren't many of my non-diabetic contemporaries who can still do those things, either. It's not just T1s who get depressed, being an insulin-resistant T2 can be very depressing when you're trying to keep your butt size under control. People here are so right when they suggest finding your own ways to help work around depression. It sounds so Pollyanna, but exercising your other emotions can help put depression in a better perspective.
Thank you for all the replies,
I still dont know what im gonna do... im not sure if the depression is gone or not.. For now im fine but starting to feel like i wanna give up.. sometimes its just too much being a teenager and trying to look after yourself 24/7/365. Arent you all fed up with this?? I am ,but i guess it makes who we are
Yeah, this morning I was changing my pod and for that short time while I had nothing attached to my body I had a feeling of freedom but I knew that it was only a temporary feeling because as a T1 diabetic I am dependent of insulin and need it to live my life as normal as possible. I have my ups and downs but I've found that by better controlling my disease, I can live a more normal life style.
Nat
I completely emphazise with you ... I have been with diabetes for more than 10 years. I was diagnosed when I was 25 years old and now I am 35 yrs old...
The way I look at it is that is like LEARN TO LIVE WITH A LITTLE ROCK INSIDE YOUR SHOE .... sometimes hurts, sometimes you might forget is there for a little while, and sometimes you just think it wasn't there and sometimes you are thankful that you have that and not something worse ...
I have 3 healthy pregnancies, I am mother of 3 handsome boys ( 7, 6 and 3 years old) and I was always told that with diabetes my risks were higher of them having issues or miscarriages, etc ... I always give all my positive thought to things that make me good! ... and give myself some time when I feel I need it ... reach out for support on things you love to do ( or find what is that thing that can make you feel better) or be as healthier as possible ...
I know how you feel because sometimes I feel the same way . When that happens, I allow myself to cry or take that sad feeling and talk with my husband. He does not have diabetes and its not the same, but he loves me and he cares for me to find that peace. Its hard but not impossible. Lets have hope that the cure will come or think that before 1912 when the insulin was discovered, people used to die because of diabetes. Now, we know insulin is not the cure but at lease keep us alive.
I hope it helps!!
kind regards
Mariana
Thank you mariana for ur reply.
It really helped me look at it all in a different aspect.And i believe i will be fine.. its just the moments you get .. you cant handle at some point.
I know ... I get sad too but I just try to focus on doing my best or accepting I didn't choose the best decisions or I could have done it better ...
Even though I am very healthy, besides diabetes, every couple of years I struggle again and smoke cigarettes and I know they are really bad! specially for us w/ D. ... so I give a chance to make mistakes and forget myself and start again day by day! ... My last A1C was the highest ever ( 7.5 ) and that was the point that I said I have to reverse this cycle ( negative) and that is what I did. No smoking at all, working out, focus on the stuff I love ( besides being with my kids) and doing my best - I committed to have my next A1C at 6
I am doing my very best!!
Please don't give up! - We have the opportunity to do something about it.
I am here if you feel down ...
Thank you my a1c results were always good. Just lately they have been high, maybe because of this whole situation: stress, emotions.
But im hoping to bring it down :)
Hi Nat my name is Melissa and my daughter who is 10 was recently diagnosed with type 1 and although I don't have it myself I do see and understand how depressing it can get, I don't even have it and its depressing and stressful just watching my daughter go threw it so I can only imagine how hard it is having diabetes. All I can say as a person who cares for someone with diabetes is you have to remeber you are still the same person you were before diagnosis you just have more obstacles in your way than others and whatever you want to do don't let daibetes hold you back or beat you down. You look like a beautiful young lady and have your whole life in front of you. So all you can do is your best to take care of yourself and don't stress so much it's not good for your mind or body. I know I don't knew you but I hope you can take some comfort in my words and try to stay positive take care and I hope you are feelin better.
Hi Nat!
I agree with you. During my 3rd year of diabetes, I also got depressed. I even became bulimic. I gained weight because I didn't really take care of my diabetes, I was angry and frustrated for having one in the first place. I didn't understand "why me?", why I got diabetes. But as time passed on, I gradually accept the fact that I'm a diabetic and I can no longer change it. But what we can do is to manage our sugar, monitor constantly, and help others as well.
When I'm hyper, I get to talk a lot and do random things but when I get hypo, I do feel depressed and empty. But I realized the best way is to constantly check our sugar and manage it right away. So if you're away, inject some bolus. If you're almost getting hypo, drink moderate amount of juice to pull your sugar up. =)
You've got a point there. I believe you just have to accept that this is how your life is right now, and move on. I think in order to do that, you have to stop clinging onto the past and look ahead, at the future.
A good song about diabetes to listen to is I Choose To Live by Howza. If you listen to the lyrics closely enough, you'll learn that there are a lot of people affected by this disease, so you're not the only one. I used to think that I was quite alone because none of my family or friends truly understood how I felt, but there are loads of people who I can relate to here!
I think you need a good support system, especially from your parents. Mine are never frustrated at me when my BGs are low or high, they just remind me that I have to control it because it affects my memory and eyesight. I'm already starting to notice the effects it has on my memory, and to be honest, it's really starting to scare me. I'm only 15; I don't have to have short term memory loss :S.
I can't remember a day when I didn't have to do at least 2 injections a day, and it's now been 13 years. You've just got to be positive about it and think that you can do everything that a non-diabetic can do, and much more.
I've recently been telling myself that if a cure for diabetes (all kinds) can be guaranteed in the future, then I absolutely don't mind living with this disease until the day I die, because that means that future generations can live in the hope that a cure will exist.
Hey Nat. You and I met during the videochat on TuDiabetes last Friday. I'm so glad you're bringing your feelings and questions to this community! You've already received a ton of great input from your peers here, and a second so much of it. Here's another 2 cents :)
I'm 37 and have had diabetes since before I can remember (diagnosed at 3.5 years). People who don't have it sometimes say things to me like "oh, you've had it so long you probably don't even notice it anymore" or "it must just be like brushing your teeth at this point". Pffff. Not quite. I still have times when I'm angry, frustrated, grieving... but those times are shorter and shorter the older I get. AND I have a perspective on life that I think a lot of my "healthy" peers lack: most stuff isn't that important. I have friends who get freaked out about regular life things that don't phase me in the least, because my frame of reference about what matters is different from theirs, and I am SO GRATEFUL for my perspective. Got a bad haircut? So what. Parking ticket? Big deal.
Nat, you get up every morning and face down this dragon AGAIN. You may sometimes feel like you're not doing a good job at it, but just the fact that you get up and try again EVERY DAY is something to be incredibly proud of.
I have been going at diabetes for about 9 years. I think over the years the biggest challenge for me is not what I have to do to maintain numbers and the impacts of highs and lows but how things are processed in my mind and my perception of incidents during highs and lows. At one point things got really messed up for me mentally because of the combinations of pills i was taking. That period of time is when I learned that what is going on my head was worse than the disease itself. At that point I thought alot of things. What helped me get through things is how i thought of the situations and how to fight things in my mind.
Before I was diagnosed I used to be an avid cyclist. I would go for hours pedaling through out the day but work got hectic and I stopped for a little while. One thing I learned from long distance and endurance sports was the mind was the most critical portion in all. I could keep fueling myself and I could rest but once I told myself I was done I could not bounce back. At that time I learned mind games to keep me going through the distance.
So these days I used the mind games to keep me going. I try to think that what happened yesterday if it was bad did not exist. When I bike i took some nasty falls but i head that if you let a fall get to you, then you never get back on the saddle. I do have those days when I need to curl up in a ball and take in all the bad. I give myself one day to reset. After that I try to push through things and pretend that 5 minutes ago did not happen. So that is how i learned to live with this. I accept the highs with the lows and in between and just work for a better number every day.
Sounds like a great attitude, PatientX!
Excellent post, Emily.
Thank you for all the replies
I will accept at some point, i just gotta figure out the way of how to accept it and live with it. Only had it for 3 years, got really upset today,. How do you not let yourself to cry?? I will be strong and posititve :)
I constantly feel up and down like happy and then sad.. what do i do about this?
Nat, concentrate like crazy on the happy, play happy music and dance to it. Leave the darkness and sadness behind, you have a whole future to live, make it a happy one. Hugs, Maureen
For me, you learn to "live" with it by not resigning yourself to it. Type 1 diabetes is a condition that I fully believe modern medicine can cure within our lifetime. The question is when, and how much do we need to push the nonprofits to listen to our demands for a cure?
Basically, live as best you can, but never resign yourself to a life always with diabetes.
I believe that everyone with Diabetes goes through so many emotions..Emotions you never thought you had until the Blood sugars got out of whack!!! But we learn that we need to take control of a bad situation and try to deal with the fluctuations of highs and low's.. It's normal to feel depressed:( Start gaining control of it instead of it controlling you...I hope you feel better soon:)
Hello x thought I would let you all know I'm happy(even the whole depress thing is gone) thank u for the help ;)