Love and Diabetes

How does your loved one support you- or not?
What could he/she do better? How has he/she surprised you with actions of support?

Love is wonderful- let’s discuss!

EDIT:::

I just deleted this post. I shouldn’t be complaining about my wife in public. Never mind me, keep going.

Yeah, pretty much everything you said applies to my husband… he’s been there since the beginning but he just doesn’t “get it” and nothing I have tried to do to help him understand has really helped :frowning:

I try not to make it an issue in our marriage, but unfortunately the fact remains that is is, and likely will always be.

My Wife is the BEST Top Notch 100% always there for me even sometimes when i am not there for myself!! She Rocks awesome gives all she has and then more I couldnt have found a better woman to support me and help me in ALL things in my life even this horrid disease! MY WIFE RULZ

RenZ

well actually since it’s almost my diabverssary i would like to thank my ex boyfriend for taking me to the hospital when almost went into DKA. He really did help me, even though we didn’t know anything about diabetes he made me burgers and salad to eat because he was afraid i couldn’t eat complex carbs, on the day before the hospital. He helped me write sugars down and helped cook dinners for me. Now my current boyfriend is always there to help me. I even let him give me a shot once! When i was feeling low he made me a pb and j sandwich. Though he isn’t hundred percent involved or aware of my sugars he still tries to help remind me to take my medicine or get something to eat. He pretty much distracts me from overthinking my diabetes, but it makes me proud that he knows alot about diabetes and what to do in emergencies and he knows the medicine i take. The only thing i could ever ask from him is to continue to support me, because believe it or not i haven’t had perfect sugars while being with him. So i know it means the world to him that i’m taking care of myself. As for my family… well they haven’t really been around since i’ve been diabetic. My dad helps by finding out information or helping pay for test strips and my mom reminds me to take care of myself and offers to help when she can. My sister, who is 14, just asks me if i’m checking my sugars but i think she’s ready to try giving me a shot. Hey she wants to be a nurse some day and she will be well versed in diabetes care by me!

Pavlos,

That took a lot of strength…
Even though you deleted it, did it help to write it?

Dh has always been on the overprotective side of me and my diabetes…to the point I wanted to harm him physically. One day I barked at him when he told me one too many times I shouldn’t be eating this or that, and his eyes got all watery and he said “I just want to grow old with you”

Ever since then if he starts with his lecturing I stop him, give him a hug and say “I love you too”.

It did help, but it didn’t feel right to criticize someone behind their back to people who don’t even know her and without giving her a chance to speak for herself. C’est la vie.

such a good husband! :slight_smile:

I like how you thought about it and realized hey, maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. That truly shows character :slight_smile: Bless you Pavlos.

My wife is wonderful. We were still newlyweds when I was diagnosed in '97. I nearly widowed her. She balled her eyes the first time she gave me a shot, as she thought it was hurting me. I laughed and said “No honey, you’re saving me.” She never gives me grief for my high numbers, or the days I don’t take as good care of myself as I should. And she congratulates me when I do. And our three kids love to give dad fingersticks! They’ve all given me shots, although now that I’m on the pump, they only get to help put the catheter from my insertion set in. They are great and wonderful and 100% supportive. Diabetes ain’t easy, but they make it easier.

Cheers, Mike

Ah, it’s so hard sometimes to get out of the “diabetes focus”. It seems like everyone around us “knows” more about our disease than we do. I say “knows” in quotes because most people don’t have a CLUE, but they definitely don’t mind sharing their opions with us on what we should be doing better.

It’s worse than taking weight loss advice from someone who’s bigger than you.

So, I get that way too. Especially if my BS is high, I get really cranky, and if he says something, I will try my hardest not to snap at him… but if I do- like you do, I give him a hug too. Sometimes it’s like an all-out warzone around my diabetes care.

I think it’s just because he’s scared… maybe morese than I am.

I hope for a family like that.

My fiance, try as he might, is terrified of needles (as am I- haha!) so he has only given me one shot in 10 years. He tries, he’s just afraid of hurting me, like your wife is of hurting you. I don’t mind. It’s really intimate, though, like letting your wife shave your face. Your trust is completely in her. It’s safe.

I hope for kids who won’t be afraid of my disease and who will want to get involved in it and to learn.

you are very lucky!

I view the replies to this discussion as facts and not as criticisms. My hubby has his good days and his bad regarding my diabetes and treatment. When I’m not feeling well or need to discuss something new, such as a test result, doctor’s appointment, etc, he’s very supportive. But when I need to ruminate about my diabetes, doctors, treatment, diet, etc., his eyes glaze over. If I continue, he’ll basically tell me to shut up.

I wonder if he just doesn’t understand it? I know that my fiance has a hard time understanding my disease, and no matter how many times I’ve tried to gently explain it to him, for some reason it just doesn’t “click”. It took almost four years for him to finally understand that if I’m “high” then I DO NOT need food. haha.

He understands most of it now.

No, he doesn’t.
Complicated story…

My boyfriend has actually been amazing. When I met him, no one else in his life had any sort of chronic illness, he'd never had to deal with something like constant monitoring of glucose before. He is a lot better now with making sure that I test, or just asking what my numbers were. Gentle reminders that don't come off as overbearing. On my bad days, he is on point! if we have been more active than usual, he is making sure I test and is half-way through pouring me orange juice before I even get to tell him that I need it. He is terrified of needles, but now that I am on the pump he tries to watch me insert whenever he can. I think he is just trying to get used to the idea of a needle in me. He still flinches whenever he touches my infusion set, thinking that he has hurt me, but he is slowly getting used to everything. I am actually really proud of him (and incredibly grateful!)

I don't require support for my diabetes, but he always knows what food to bring me when I'm low!

My husband is my hero, he has been their for me since the day we met and has never failed to be supportive, caring, and on top of my medical issues. Read my blog post about how awesome he is!

http://tamragarcia.blogspot.com/2014/08/all-hail-lee-my-hero.html

This is a 5 year old post. I checked to see if I replied, so if I missed it, sorry.
My husband is the most wonderful man ever. He knew I had D when we married (38 years ago)

He has been my hero, my support, my love, and my reason to fight. He has cried with me when D has become too much, cheered me on with changes, encouraged me to try new things. He is my rock and I wish everyone, after 53 years of D, has the kind of rock I rely on.

Teach your spouse. Engage them. Take them with you to the endo or whoever you see. Help them understand by incorporating them into your care. Do not hesitate to do this--you will need their help as you age--I know. As a T1, I started to need that partnership when our son was born in 1977 and I was hospitalized for a month--delivering a beautiful son through a difficult process.

Honestly. it is all about love and commitment for me. I am truly blessed. I wish everyone the same.

awesome story! I am all over this site trying to get a handle on this new diagnosis and love hearing the good stuff. My hubby is also very supportive, we have a motorcycle and he even found this bag online that holds a freezer gel pack to keep my insulin pens and supplies in for the day trips that we take. We took an overnight trip recently and he even made sure we would be stopping when I needed for testing and Lantus shot time. We found out on Christmas night that he had bladder cancer so we went through all the treatments, he is a truck driver and he also lost his job because he needed to be home every Sunday night for treatments on Monday mornings (lovely company!) He is now cancer free!Yippee...Then bam! I am hit with D and he goes into dragon slaying mode taking care of me.