My Journey

I was diagnosed when I was 14...I am now 35...you would think I would have this under control by now...but I don't...and I wonder all the time why not...I know the dangers both long and short term...I've been in the hospital in intensive care on several occasions...I'm well aware of what I face as the years go by...so why in the world can I not get it together?

I was lucky enough to qualify for a program that enabled me to recieve a pump...at the time I was like "wow its about to get easier" and in many many ways it has...but in many other ways its gotten more difficult!

I think all the time "u have the tools to live a good life so why aren't you?" Is it just laziness? Do I not love myself enough to do the things that I need to do?

Since the 1st of the month I have had 10 low BS...we r only on the 11th...and I'm getting very tired and angry...

So today...today is the day...I'm going to start again

I will be contacting my Dr. I will be honest and admitt that I need help...and I will start over.

Hopefuly today is the first day of the rest of my LONG life!

Wish me luck!!

GOOD LUCK .. YOU CAN DO THIS .. JUST TRY LIVING EACH DAY ON ITS OWN :)

How are you defining Low BS? 10x where you required assistance would be concerning but I run down towards the lower end pretty regularly and am sort of used to it. One thing I noticed when I got the pump is that I can run very closely to where I want to be but, if the doses are a bit off, it can make things a lot more comfortable to make very small adjustments one way or the other.

Signing up at Tu may be very useful because it may be easy to talk about particular problems and get solutions from people here. It may seem odd if you haven't done it before but some of the conversations are pretty detailed, in many ways more detailed than what I get from my doctor, since you can post every day since every day is an adventure.

Yes I've reading how open members are on here and I love thier honesty! My lows have all been under 4. I had a 1.9 the other day that really scared me...I have sent an email to my diabetic nurse requesting an appointment...I'm thinking I'd like to start all over again with my settings things are so out of wack!

Thank you for your encouragment Shahenda...every bit sure does help! :)

Diabetes is as much a disease of the mind as it is something wrong with our bodies. Sure, sometimes it is like a difficult challenging problem, but the hardest part is paying attention, making compromises and not letting it get you down. You aren't alone.

As to helping improve control, there are people here with a great deal of experience who may be able to assist you. In the end, I think you are most successful if you become self-competent. That you know all that is required on how to adjust you basal/bolus regime and all of your pump settings. That you know how to do basal testing, make adjustments to your ratios and deal with problems when encountered. A good book you might consider is "Pumping Insulin" by John Walsh.

You are absolutely right Brian...thnks I will check out that book!

hi thanks for your input on jacobs situation, you are absolutely on target. i will work on my suzie sunshine everything is fine approach!, i can so see how your mom tried this, but we need to allow our loved ones their own emotions. as far as you, i love your line start over, i am a yoga teacher and i use that line all the time. so empowering no mater what has happened we always can start over new, and try not to make more than one (hopefully healthy) decision at a time. pumping is definitely more complicated than MDI but it is worth learning all the tricks, only you can put the effort in and yes you can smile inside one decision at a time that brings you closer to the healthy you that you are, and when you fall down START OVER! best wishes! amy