Thank you everyone for the well wishes for my son, Jesse, who is attending Texas State University. He had only two weeks left of school and was hit walking across the street on campus in the crosswalk and green light for him to cross. He has broken his tibia on left and right side but is 1 1/2 inches of bone is crumbling so must heal before any surgery can be done. Jesse is not able to complete the semester. I am having his stuff moved out of his apartment next week and he won’t get to say goodbye to his friends that are graduating and moving on to other schools or employment. To say he is devastated is an understatement. The pain has not been manageable and keep having to go back to the ER to get intermuscular injections for pain and IV pain meds. He just lost his summer job at the local theater here where he had 4 productions scheduled plus other outside employment. I retained a lawyer yesterday after the ortho specialist said Jesse had to remain in a hardwire brace for a minimum of 3 months with absolutely no weight bearing so the bones can heal. We are waiting to hear if the school is giving him an incomplete for the semester or can work something out for him. Drafting class is out of the question at the moment. I am dealing with his nightmares and screaming flashbacks of being thrown onto the hood of a car and then backward flying onto the pavement. I am very grateful he is alive but his future plans are unknown. Thank you all for your replies. Judith
I am so sorry things have gotten so out of whack. i know this will work out, but it will take some time. three ideas I have:
Find his academic adviser and you and he approach them for advice. I suspect they will provide an incomplete and that way at least he / you will not have to pay for the same classes again, and more important he will not need to carry F’s
When you talk to the adviser tell them you need to discuss disability services. Chances are very good that they will assign a summer tutor or assistant to get him through his classes on time and in good shape. Even if there is not an assistant, he will get extra time for completion and likely wavier of any late penalties for taking an incomplete.
Finally, ask the adviser about allowing him to walk with his class. Generally, they will allow it even with an incomplete for an instance like this. i suspect if he wants to walk he will be able to walk, if the request is made.
One more thing, If this happened to me, I woudl not want to walk. Remember, the graduation ceremony is usually for parents. Yes important, but it usually means less to the student than the parents. If it were me, I would not want to walk until I knew i had earned it. He may feel the same and he may not. I suggest you let him make this decision.
Again, I wish you the very very best.
Am so sorry to hear Jesse’s sad news. I didn’t know what happened or I would have written.
Devastating to have all his plans put on hold on top of the pain. Pain alone is enough:( A brace–awful. Will they give him a pump for pain management?
Sending Jesse & his lovely mom all positive thoughts for healing.
Thank you Rick for the great advice. As a matter of fact we are working on these issues as we speak. The Chair of the Dept. has been left with the decision and said it would take some time. Jesse is an all honors student with a $5000 scholarship given to him for being gifted as his craft of lighting design in theatrical arts. Jesse was transferred to my hospital where I live about two and a half hours away. He is at home now but I am having to do everything for him. Gerri, the idea of a pain pump is a great idea. We have a huge hospital here which is a learning hospital for Baylor and Texas A&M with a pain management clinic. If he doesn’t get better in a couple days, I am going to have his ortho specialist send us that way. It’s very difficult to see your child going thru this. He is much luckier than his sister who was in a fatal car accident on her way to college when she was 20 and was not her fault. Thank you for helping me hold it together here.
Rick always has great advice! Since reading your discussion, I spoke with my husband about what would be done where he works. He’s an English professor at a state university & has dealt with medical emergencies with many students. They’ve all gotten incompletes without problem. He passed a couple of students without them completing the course because they were outstanding students & had extenuating medical problems. Others were allowed to complete work on-line, if they could. My nephew was in the hospital over two months due to his cystic fibrosis during his last semester in law school. He graduated on time & passed the bar.
Horrible to see your baby in pain, hurt & depressed. Hope you can keep his spirits up. Jesse’s talented & smart. Awful he’s had this terrible detour & he’ll get it through it with you at his side.
Crazy for Jesse to have to go to the ER for pain management! Hope he gets a pain pump pronto. Having this under control will help him emotionally feel better, too.
Hugs to you & gentle hugs to Jesse. We’re here for you!
Sorry about that.
My mother broke her tibia 10 years ago.
I wish you all the best too.
Hugs my dear friend…and to Jesse too. You both are in my prayers…for strength and courage.
i’m so sorry to hear that!
definitely contact the school and his professors…they should be willing to work with him/you for his class work and grades…poor thing! i wish i could give you both a hug!
Awww! How awful for Jesse and you also. I can imagine how I would feel, if it was my Son. You both will be in my daily prayers for healing. I hope that his nighmares end and his pain is Better controlled Really soon. I went through a similar accident and trauma with my Hubby a couple years back.
Thank you everyone for the well wishes. I just turned over everything to an attorney today as I am overwelmed by it all. Jesse is my priority. I appreciate you all so much. Judith
We are all with you in spirit and our hopes are high. If you can keep us apprised I know it will relieve how anxious we are for your son. Hang in there, this will be fine, but it may be rough before it gets alright. The pain management thing seems like issue one.
Oh Judith, I just hope everything works out for him! Always remember you guys are in my thoughts. Here’s wishing all is well for him!
Thank you Doris and Rick. Yes, pain management seems to be a key issue and sadly his orthopedic surgeon did not call back today but seems that my son is showing allergic signs to the pain meds. He gets bright red streaks on his body about 15 minutes after taking the meds. We also have been concerned and complaining to him that the burning under his knee and a knot behind his knee is hot and burning. I am very concerned about a blood clot but might just be the inflammation.
I was not expecting Jesse home this month and has taken all my financial resources. I have taken everything and put into his education so I live on a very low means for myself. I rented a UHaul today for Thurs. to move him out of his 2nd story apartment and some instructors and college classmates are going to meet me and help load up the truck. He lives about 2 1/2 hours away from where I live. Jesse just got fired from his summer job as he won’t be able to perform at the theater where he had worked the past three years as a lighting designer for live stage performances.
His depression and flashbacks with nightly screaming nightmares has broken me and he reached out asking for help last night. I got a lot of run around about being seen without insurance at my hospital. They sell their own insurance and is a very large learning hospital for Texas A&M and Baylor - Scott and White Hospital. I have an appt. for Monday for him but they are demanding payment as soon as he is seen.
I have retained a lawyer for all the tremendous current loss and future losses regarding this as there is no telling how long this will take to heal. He is an all honor student and workaholic and his world just crashed to a stop. He is not handling this well and never the kind to sit around. I appreciate the concerns and having someone to talk to about this. As a parent, this is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do and no one likes to see their child in pain whether physical, mental or both.
Thank you all so much.
Oh dear, that does sound like an allergic reaction. Awful the doctor didn’t return your call when Jesse’s in this kind of pain!
I am not happy and now it’s the weekend the way these things always happen. My lawyer was busy and said he would call me after 5pm and didn’t. Sigh…I am just lost and empty.
Keep calling the doc even though it’s the weekend. He’s either on-call or another doctor is. Between Jesse’s pain & a possible allergic reaction, someone needs to respond pronto. So aggravating!
Lawyers never call when they say they will.
No doubt you’re exhausted & drained:(
Thank you for being so understanding, Gerri.
I agree with Gerri here that sounds like an allerigic reaction! Do what she said!!! I just read this sorry about that but I go here before I check my mail. I wish the best for you guys. Yes seeing your child hurt in ANYWAY hurts you. Hold STRONG!! Come on over to my page anytime!! Don’t forget to take care of yourself too.
The last thing I feel like doing is jumping on the interstate for the next 5 hours but that is what I am about to do. My son only has the one set of clothes at my place so I am driving down to get his bathroom supplies and some clothes until we can move all his stuff out on Thurs. with a UHaul. Wish me well as I am thinking kind of fuzzy today and very overwelmed. Hopefully Austin traffic will be kind to me for once. Judith53
A couple of points, you might not have thought of. First remember the insurance for the driver should help with the immediate costs. In most states, I cannot speak for texas, it is very difficult for a pedestrian to be at fault in an automobile accident. Generally, the pedestrian has to have done something willfully wrong in order for them to be found liable. This is good news on the financial front because generally the driver will have to pay the cost of the accident including medical payments for recovery and services. Your attorney can advise on this issue, but I am guessing that he / she will likely put the insurance on notice immediately and the hospital will proceed with the idea that the costs will be paid for by the drivers insurance. This is not to suggest you should decline the med policy, but my guess is you will get along for at least a couple of weeks under that assumption, until it is proved otherwise.
Second, if the fault lay with the city or university who control and design the intersection, responsibility may be shared by or shouldered by that entity. Again your attorney will know how to proceed. Going to the attorney is job 1 or 2 on Monday with the doctors office being the other 1 or 2. My guess is that the parties will reach a good understanding of what will needed to get the doctors going. It may not be the final arrangement, and for goodness sakes do not agree to anything unless advised by your attorney to do so, but i suspect am accomodation will be reached pretty quickly next week.